Dear Nationals Fans: Thank you, sincerely, for your patriotic performance last night. Signed, an Astros fan

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The first official renewal of the season is … unexpected.

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What you need to know before you watch the Watchmen.

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You have officially survived 1,000 days of this shitshow, give yourself a round of applause.

But also, buckle your seat belt because it’s only getting worse.

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Pour one out for the first cancelation of the season

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There’s a whole lot going on at the White House, but the only thing Late Night can focus on is Stephen Miller’s hilarious “hair.”

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