It’s another Friday which means another weekend which means … well, who even knows anymore.
— The Portland Beehive (@OregonProgress) August 14, 2020
The Curb Your Enthusiasm showrunner on that amazing episode with the MAGA hat and President Humorless’ response:
It prompted a tweet from the president. Is that considered a victory?
It’s so funny — when we were shooting it, someone on set was like, “When this comes out, he’s definitely going to tweet about this.” And I said, “No, that’s crazy.” And then he did, and he pinned it at the top of his feed, and it just stayed up there. This guy is so stupid, he doesn’t realize we’re making fun of him. Larry and I talked about it, like, is there a response we do? But we decided to just let that orange-haired baby sit in his own messy diaper.
Apparently, President Twatter attacked Joe Scarborough and Mika Brzezinski again, and Mika wasn’t having it:
“What’s your thing with women?” asked Brzezinski, who shares the show with husband, Joe Scarborough.
Brzezinski claimed the President had been “completely strung” out over presumptive Democratic nominee Joe Biden’s pick of Sen. Kamala Harris (D-Calif.) as his running mate in the 2020 election.
Trump gets “really” stressed out by women, Brzezinski said, adding that he went scurrying off “like a little baby” when confronted by female reporters.
Brzezinski then took Trump to task over his coronavirus failings:
“I just wonder what ditzy means? Because if I’m ditzy, you’re disastrous. This has been a disaster. 167,000 people are dead, Donald Trump. Stop tweeting about Morning Joe and Morning Mika and do your damn job.”
John Legend, The Chicks, Common, Billie Eilish, Leon Bridges, Jennifer Hudson, Billy Porter, Maggie Rogers, Prince Royce, and Stephen Stills will all perform at the Democratic National Convention. But no Kanye West.
Black America Votes: The VP Choice a special about Kamala Harris will air on BET on August 16.
Listen to me: they are literally pulling mailboxes up off of the street to hamper this election.
The USPS is literally backing up trucks to mailboxes and taking them away. Here are photos of mailboxes being “decommissioned” in SE Portland and Eugene, Ore. Check out how many are already on the trucks! But today's news is probably going to be about "golden showers" instead. pic.twitter.com/qROzgpZS0P
— Janet Harris, M.P.Aff. (@ThinkUpstream) August 13, 2020
Look. This dismantling of the postal service must be dealt with, but the depressing fact is the chance we can stop it from happening before the election is slim. We are 81 days from Election Day and I just learned that here in Texas, early voting has been extended, and will now begin on October 13. That is 60 DAYS AWAY, TEXAS.
I know I yelled about this not that long ago, but it’s vitally important that everyone figure out how they are going to vote in this election, as President Disruptor has made it explicitly clear he is going to fuck with it. I’m not saying that people shouldn’t vote by mail — by all means, do so, but be sure to mail your ballot in as far ahead of Election Day as you are legally allowed. The bottom line is that right now is the time to make a plan on how you will vote, and you can not necessarily count on the post office as being a part of that plan.
1. Early voting in person when the crowds will (presumably) be smaller than on Election Day proper. Here’s a state-by-state calendar of early voting (if your state has early voting).
2. Drop your absentee ballot at an election office or polling location, if allowed by your state. Check here to find out if your state allows you to drop your ballot off at a local polling location.
3. Drop your absentee ballot in a ballot box. There are only a handful of states (as of right now) who allow ballot boxes (Texas not being one of them, obviously), check here to see if yours is one.
4. Community ballot collection. This is an option I had not heard of before, but most states have some sort of law that allows family members, election officials, or designated organizations to deliver signed and sealed ballots to the proper election authorities. CHECK YOUR STATE’S LAWS CAREFULLY because this one feels to me the option most vulnerable to shenanigans but if you have health risks, or have relatives at health risk, this might be the safest option to make sure their vote counts.
Of course, none of this applies to President Hypocrite who just requested a mail-in ballot.
Meanwhile, professional athletes might save us all. Thank you, LeBron James, the Los Angeles Dodgers, Atlanta Hawks, Milwaukee Bucks and Detroit Pistons. YOUR MOVE, ASTROS/ROCKETS/TEXANS.
Clever clever clever:
While he and Jada have been working from home, Will Smith’s production company employees have been working from their offices and last week 10 of them tested positive for the virus. GOD DAMN. I also learned in this piece that DJ Jazzy Jeff got the virus. Hope you’re feeling better, Jazzy Jeff!
Jojo Fletcher is taking over as the host of The Bachelorette for two weeks so that Chris Harrison can quarantine for 14 days after dropping off his son at college. (TCU, in fact. Go Horned Frogs!)
NCIS and NCIS: Los Angeles are set to restart production next month.
Emmy nominees are being asked to pretape acceptance speeches to make for a smoother telecast, and some people are freaking out about it apparently.
I almost posted an article about how Hollywood is hiring COVID safety coordinators yesterday, but then I didn’t because, eh. Who cares. However, this interview with an entertainment lawyer about restarting productions got my attention because unlike safety coordinators, lawyers have real power to SHUT SHIT DOWN if need be.
Your School District’s Reopening Survey.
This is what happens when the leader of the free world discourages people from wearing masks and taking the virus seriously.
Oh, look: how a real President would respond to this virus, with the MOST OBVIOUS THING IN THE WORLD.
The White House released a document crowing about all of the administration’s great successes in dealing with COVID-19, and you’ll be surprised to hear it was full of broad generalizations and horseshit. Here, Medium writers do an excellent job of breaking down point-by-point all of the lies.
Black Lives Matter
CBS has signed a deal with law enforcement and public safety advisory group 21CP Solutions to consult their writing staffs of their crime and legal procedurals, in the wake of the Black Lives Matter protests. “The group is made up of police chiefs who have “turned around troubled police departments and renewed the community’s confidence in their agencies,” lawyers and community leaders who have overseen public safety and reform efforts, and social scientists and academics studying public safety.” OK. Let’s see.
HBO Max has added a contextual notice to Blazing Saddles.
What is wrong with people? LEAVE STANLEY ALONE, YOU MONSTERS.
View this post on Instagram
For those of you who don’t believe racism is still alive in the world… here’s the proof. Our goal has simply been to entertain and give the fans a quality series. These rants are evidence that there is still a great deal of work that needs to be done here in America regarding racism. Bigotry and hate will not be allowed to irradicate art or Black people. Enough said.
“Of course Black lives matter,” Parton told interviewers, before adding, delightfully, “Do we think our little white asses are the only ones that matter? No!” GOD BLESS DOLLY PARTON.
Viola Davis bought the plantation where she was born as her 55th birthday present to herself. Beautiful and powerful.
The above is the house where I was born August 11, 1965. It is the birthplace of my story. Today on my 55th year of life….I own it….all of it.
"May you live long enough to know why you were born.”
-Cherokee Birth Blessing- pic.twitter.com/CatJK405BL
— Viola Davis (@violadavis) August 11, 2020
Carla Lalli Music, a video host at Bon Appétit, quit the company over diversity issues.
It’s Clayton Bigsby IRL
(And he can see)
— Andreas Hale (@AndreasHale) August 13, 2020
As always, Tucker Carlson can go fuck himself.
The family of Elijah McClain is suing the city of Aurora, Colorado, and some of its officers over his death. Good. All lives taken by the police are a tragedy, obviously, but there is something about this case that hurts my heart in a deeper way. I see my own sons in his face.
All Other TV News
Apple might be making a deal to bundle Apple TV+, CBS All Access, and Showtime, which is an interesting development. CBS All Access is one of the few streamers I’m not subscribed to as I’m not a big Star Trek fan, but depending on what the overhaul of the service looks like next year, this might turn out to be a decent deal, especially if you are a subscriber to Showtime on cable and you are willing to drop it from your cable package.
This article is a very interesting look at Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz’s marriage (and how he was a philandering asshole), but I also learned that Lucille Ball invented reruns so that she could spend time with her kids. PIONEER.
Team Jaime. Let’s redo the ending.
Teddi Mellencamp’s baby daughter is recovering from neurosurgery. Here’s to hoping to continues to go well!
Congratulations to America’s favorite family.
- Celebrity Game Face has been renewed at E!
- The Other Two and South Side are moving from Comedy Central to HBO Max.
- The Upper World, a sci-fi movie starring and produced by Daniel Kaluuya, is coming to Netflix.
- So Others May Live a drama about the Coast Guard is being turned into a TV series.
- People are Awesome, a series about ordinary people doing extraordinary things, is in the works.
- Gina Prince-Bythewood and Reggie Rock Bythewood have signed an overall deal with Touchstone Television.
- Angela Bassett, Oprah Winfrey, Courtney B. Vance and Phylicia Rashad are set to star in Between the World and Me on HBO. Damn. Those are power hitters.
- Sara Haines is returning as a co-host on The View now that her show with Michael Strahan and Keke Palmer collapsed. (BRING BACK SOAP OPERAS. NOBODY WANTS 18 HOURS OF DAYTIME TALK SHOWS.)
- Will Kemp will star in Christmas Waltz on Hallmark Channel.
Mark Your Calendar
- The LEGO Star Wars Holiday Special will premiere on Disney+ on November 17. It will be a sort of sequel to the notorious 1978 Star Wars Holiday Special.
- Bad Hair will debut on Hulu on October 23.
- Singletown will debut on HBO Max on August 20.
- Trinkets returns on Netflix on August 25.
- All or Nothing: Tottenham Hotspur will premiere on Amazon on August 31.
- Scare Me will debut on Shudder on October 1.
- L.A.’s Finest will return on Spectrum on September 9.
- Rising Phoenix will debut on Netflix on August 26.
- Masaba Masaba will premiere on Netflix on August 28.
- The Idhun Chronicles will premiere on Netflix on September 10.
- Class of ’83 will debut on Netflix on August 21.
- Two Weeks to Live will debut on Sky soon.
- Four Blumhouse movies are coming to Amazon: The Lie on October 6; Black Box on October 6; Evil Eye on October 13; and Nocturne on October 13.
- Don’t Be Tardy … will return on Bravo on October 6.
- The School Nurse Files will debut on Netflix on September 25.
- Black Love will return on OWN on September 5.
- Big Hero 6: The Series returns on Disney+ on September 21.
- Help! I Wrecked My House will debut on HGTV on September 12.
Boys State: Every year, 1,200 high school juniors converge on Austin for a leadership program. This documentary explores the event through a handful of teens, including one Katy kid, Steven Garza. Apple TV+
Project Power: Jaime Foxx and Joseph Gordon-Levitt star in this action film about a drug that gives the user temporary superpowers. Netflix
Ted Lasso: Jason Sudeikis stars as an American football coach who is hired to coach an English soccer team. SORRY, “football” team. Series premiere. Apple TV+
Teenage Bounty Hunters: Twin teen sisters balance high school with their jobs as bounty hunters in this new series. Series premiere. Netflix
World’s Toughest Race: Eco-Challenge Fiji: Bear Grylls hosts this new adventure race in which 66 teams race across Fiji. Series premiere. Amazon
3%: Fourth season premiere. Netflix
Birds of Prey: And the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn: Harley Quinn teams up with Black Canary, Huntress, and Detective Renee Montoya to save a young street thief. 7 p.m., HBO
Parenthood: Remember young Keanu? ~sigh~ 7 p.m., Showtime Family Zone
Lovecraft Country: Atticus travels with his childhood friend Letitia and uncle George across the country looking for his missing father in this new horror series. Series premiere. Can not wait. HBO
The Circus: John Heilemann, Alex Wagner, and Mark McKinnon are back to cover the presidential campaigns as they head into the conventions. Or “conventions.” Season premiere. 7 p.m., Showtime
Last Week Tonight: The 200th episode. 10:20 p.m., HBO
- Watch What Happens Live (Sunday): Phoebe Robinson, Karen Huger
|CBS||The Greatest #AtHome Videos
|CW||Masters of Illusion
|Masters of Illusion
|FOX||Friday Night Smackdown||Local|
|ABC||AFV: America This is You!
|The Good Doctor
|CBS||NCIS: Los Angeles
|SEAL Team||48 Hours||News/Local|
|NBC||Stanley Cup Playoffs||News/
|Saturday Night Live
|ABC||America’s Funniest Home Videos
|Celebrity Family Feud
|Press Your Luck
|CBS||60 Minutes||Big Brother
|NCIS: Los Angeles
|NCIS: New Orleans
|The CW||Local||Fridge Wars
|FOX||Last Man Standing
|Bless the Harts
|Stanley Cip Playoff
One thought on “They are literally pulling post office boxes off the street. That’s how scared they are of your vote.”