It is Wednesday, May 6 and this is the greatest bit of acting and writing on an episode of Law & Order: SVU that I have EVER SEEN:
This is the best name and job description in all of tv writing history. pic.twitter.com/Yb1D5w6fId
— Alison Leiby (@AlisonLeiby) November 21, 2018
David Chase, bored in lockdown, imagined The Sopranos characters in quarantine, and I guess the big news is that Tony is still alive? Michael Imperioli and Steve Schirripa’s “Talking Sopranos” podcast has the script, and Vulture has transcribed it if you’d rather just read it.
TONY SOPRANO: Sports betting? Fucking gone with the wind, along with professional sports. Me and my friends are dying over here. The president might have a point. Let’s get business and manufacturing going again — by Easter, May Day, whatever the fuck.
The next couple of weeks should have been Upfronts Week for the networks but then, well … you know. So ViacomCBS and Disney are making virtual plans, and I’m sure more are to follow. ViacomCBS’s virtual upfronts will take place on May 18 and 19 (with CBS and CBS All Access on the 19th), and Disney’s will take place between May 26 – June 1. (I assume ABC’s will be before this, but WHO KNOWS.)
This is kinda cool: The Blacklist‘s season finale will be partially animated in a graphic novel style as the episode was halfway through filming when the shutdown took place.
Discovery has set up a lineup of COVID-19 programming.
Group Chat the Show and Game Face, two series both produced remotely, are coming to Nickelodeon this summer.
NBCUniversal’s senior leadership will be taking a 20% pay cut thanks to the virus.
The Brits are coming up with plans for how to film in the time of COVID-19.
President DumbAss went to a mask factory in Arizona … where he didn’t wear a mask … and “Live and Let Die” played at FULL BLAST. This is a fucking metaphor.
The Sociopath-in-Chief also gave an interview to ABC’s David Muir, where he shrugged off the impending death toll. Also, this was the best he could do in response to a perfectly predictable question:
ICYMI: Trump's response to ABC asking him why he wasn't more prepared for the coronavirus was, "Well, I'll be honest, uh, I have a lot of things going on."
Yes, that's a real quote. pic.twitter.com/7l9v3dgrOz
— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) May 6, 2020
President Got Nothing Better To Do Than Watch TV and Tweet, also went after late-night hosts for some dumb reason:
Wow! Congratulations to Greg Gutfeld, a one time Trump Hater who has come all the way home. His Ratings easily beat no talent Stephen Colbert, nice guy Jimmy Fallon, and wacko “last placer” Jimmy Kimmel. Greg built his show from scratch, and did a great job in doing so. @FoxNews
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) May 5, 2020
He’s not wrong — technically: 80,000 more people watched Gutfeld’s show than Colbert’s. But here’s the thing: this is comparing apples to oranges. Gutfeld’s show is not in direct competition with the others in any metric. He airs once a week, on Saturdays, at 9 p.m. They air four times a week, during the week, at 11:30 p.m. And there’s a reason we don’t compare late-night shows ratings to The View‘s, or to NCIS‘. Because that’s not how ratings work.
Happy Cinco de Mayo Mr. President! Thanks for the shout-out – now get back to work royally fucking everything up! https://t.co/aa3VKeePJv
— Jimmy Kimmel (@jimmykimmel) May 5, 2020
The New York Times staff will be working from home until at least early September.
But Shanghai Disneyland is ready to reopen five days from now! Which seems like not a great idea, but OK!
Good News:
The Irish have been stepping up to help Native Americans who have been hit hard by COVID-19, raising at the time of this writing some $2.5 million, as thanks for what the Choctaw Nation did for them during the Potato Famine. This is a beautiful and virtually unheard of story, and here’s the GoFund Me to help the Navajo and Hopi Nations if you are so inclined.
Several of our recent donations for our GoFundMe campaign have been inspired by the Great Hunger Famine in Ireland which started in 1845.
During this difficult time, in 1847, the Choctaw Nation provided $170 of relief aid to the Irish to help them (today that is the equivalent of $5,000). Not long before the Great Hunger Famine in Ireland, 60,000 Native Americans, including the Choctaw people, had suffered through the experience of the Trail of Tears. The death of many people on the Trail of Tears sparked empathy for the Irish people in their time of need. Thus, the Choctaw extended $170 of relief aid.
173 years later to today, the favor is returned through generous donations from the Irish people to the Navajo Nation during our time of crisis. A message from Irish donor, Pat Hayes, sent from Ireland across the ocean: “From Ireland, 170 years later, the favour is returned! To our Native American brothers and sisters in your moment of hardship.”
The heartache is real. We have lost so many of our sacred Navajo elders and youth to COVID-19. It is truly devastating. And a dark time in history for our Nation. In moments like these, we are so grateful for the love and support we have received from all around the world. Acts of kindness from indigenous ancestors passed being reciprocated nearly 200 years later through blood memory and interconnectedness. Thank you, IRELAND, for showing solidarity and being here for us.
All Other TV News
Damon Lindelof breaks down his writing process in this Variety video. Note: it’s filmed in a room covered in art by Hunt Slonem, an artist who made an appearance on The Real Housewives of New York City last season. My TV worlds = colliding.
It took Steve Carrell to convince Greg Daniels to not kill a horse at Jim and Pam’s wedding.
How dare anyone question Trixie Mattel, Bob the Drag Queen, or Sasha Velour’s wins. ABSOLUTELY NOT. But Manila Luzon was robbed three times over.
Renewals
- CBS just renewed practically all of their shows — some 18 of them.
- Fuck, That’s Delicious and Most Expensivest have been renewed at Vice.
Cancellations
In Development
- A dark comedy starring Jean Smart as a Las Vegas diva created by the Broad City creators and produced by Mike Schur has been ordered at HBO Max and JUST TAKE MY MONEY ALREADY.
- The Terminal List, a conspiracy thriller produced by and starring Chris Pratt, has been ordered at Amazon.
- A miniseries based on former Toronto mayor Rob Ford starring Jim Gaffigan is in the works at AMC.
- The Midnight Club is being turned into a series at Netflix by the guy who created The Haunting of Hill House.
- Charm City Kings, a film starring Meek Mill among others, will debut on HBO Max.
- Bright 2 is coming to Netflix.
Mark Your Calendars
- ESPN is moving up more sports documentaries on the heels of the success of The Last Dance: LANCE will premiere on May 19; Be Water will debut on June 7; and Long Gone Summer will premiere on June 14.
- TBS and truTV will air an I’m Sorry marathon on May 10, and I strongly urge you to watch if you haven’t seen this hilarious series.
- Game On! will now debut on CBS on May 27.
- American Soul will return on BET on May 27.
R.I.P.
Else Blangsted, Film music editor and Holocaust survivor
Millie Small, Jamaican singer
WATCH THIS
Becoming: This documentary follows Michelle Obama on her 30-city book tour. Premiere. Netflix
Riverdale: Jughead writes revenge porn in the season finale. 7 p.m., The CW
SEAL Team: The terrorist leader they are after is related to someone in Jason’s past. Season finale. 9 p.m., CBS
Late Night:
- Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon: Gabrielle Union, Henry Winkler, Brad Paisley
- Late Night with Seth Meyers: Ice Cube, Sarah Kendzior
- The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: Robert De Niro, Alison Roman
- The Late Late Show with James Corden: Beanie Feldstein, Machine Gun Kelly, Travis Barker
- Jimmy Kimmel Live: Kevin Bacon, Kyra Sedgwick
- The Daily Show: The Daily Social Distancing Show
- Conan: Kristin Chenoweth
- Watch What Happens Live: “Summer House” Reunion Show
- A Little Late with Lily Singh: Christina Hendricks
WEDS. | 7:00 | 7:30 | 8:00 | 8:30 | 9:00 | 9:30 |
ABC | The Gold-bergs (new) |
Schooled (new) |
Modern Family (new) |
Single Parents (new) |
Shark Tank (new) |
CBS | Survivor (new) |
SEAL Team (new) |
CW | Riverdale (new) |
Bulletproof (repeat) |
Local |
FOX | The Masked Singer (new) |
News/Local |
NBC | Chicago Med (repeat) |
Chicago Fire (repeat) |
Chicago P.D. (repeat) |
Kinda bummed out about Broke being cancelled. I really liked it and it was definitely coming into it’s own. No idea what the ratings were but it’s getting harder to invest time in these good shows that the broadcast companies are only giving a year to find their footing.