HELLO IT IS THURSDAY FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO WERE WONDERING.
Today is the third anniversary of Tom Holland’s classic performance of “Umbrella” on Lip Sync Battle, so be sure to mark the occasion:
TODAY MARKS 3 YEARS SINCE THE INFAMOUS LIP SYNC BATTLE AIRED ON NATIONAL TELEVISION AND THE WORLD WAS BLESSED WITH TOM HOLLAND PERFORMING UMBRELLA BY RIHANNA PERFECTLY! and from that moment, I knew he was our perfect spider-man. pic.twitter.com/Np3EwyW5Li
— bell⋆ (@spiderlingdaya) May 7, 2020
Saturday Night Live is doing it from home again this weekend — and it will be the season finale. While I hope things return to normal and they are back in 8H next fall, I’d be lying if I said I haven’t been enjoying these quarantine episodes.
Love in the Time of Corona, a limited romantic comedy, has been ordered at Freeform.
Hollywood Game Night will compete while social distancing on May 12 on NBC.
Regular Heroes, a docuseries focusing on heroes of this pandemic and hosted by Alicia Keys, is coming to Amazon.
Cooped Up, a rom-com about a coronavirus quarantine, is coming to Crackle Plus. Did I mention it was made in 2016?
Artificial: Remote Intelligence is being remotely produced and will stream on Twitch on May 21.
Meanwhile, Fox News will be airing a special episode called America vs. China because Fox News is gonna Fox News.
Here’s some stuff you can stream tonight thanks to this whole mess, including Frances McDormand, Oscar Isaac, John Turturro, Jeffrey Wright, Frankie Faison, David Strathairn reading Oedipus Rex and a Dead to Me table read.
The Czech Republic says it’s ready to allow filming to resume. Carnival Row and The Falcon And The Winter Soldier both film in the country.
President Cheeto news:
- His personal valet has tested positive.
- He said wearing a mask would make him look ridiculous and make it seem like he’s “preoccupied with health.”
- He also said it was the media’s fault they didn’t see him wear the mask at the mask factory that he didn’t wear.
- He contradicted a nurse on whether or not PPE was available. On National Nurse Day.
- He suppressed a CDC guide to reopening businesses because it was too restrictive.
- He promised to “terminate health care.”
"What we are doing is we wanna terminate health care, for … under Obamacare, because it's bad." — Trump's latest word salad about health care featured some unfortunately phrasing pic.twitter.com/5Stf99SbMG
— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) May 6, 2020
Oh look, it’s my governor who is, apparently, not incompetent, just cynical, and does not care if your mother or grandfather or you die from this thing.
BREAKING: As @GovAbbott reopens the state in the midst of a rising infection and death rate, leaked audio from a call with Texas Legislators reveals that he knows reopening puts more Texans at risk. #txlege pic.twitter.com/kTK4M8gpSY
— Progress Texas (@ProgressTX) May 5, 2020
In the category of “How Much Weirder Could 2020 Become,” I offer two new items:
1. For the first time ever, a toilet was flushed in the middle of a Supreme Court hearing.
2. Axl Rose and the Secretary of Labor had a twitter fight. Embarrassingly for him, Steve Mnuchin, a cabinet secretary, punctuated his comeback with a Liberian flag instead of an American one.
Axl Rose definitely noticed:
My bad I didn’t get we’re hoping 2 emulate Liberia’s economic model but on the real unlike this admin I’m not responsible for 70k+ deaths n’ unlike u I don’t hold a fed gov position of responsibility 2 the American people n’ go on TV tellin them 2 travel the US during a pandemic.
— Axl Rose (@axlrose) May 7, 2020
We are in the weirdest, worst timeline y’all. I will not be surprised in the least when an old Simpsons clip emerges showing McBain getting into a war of words with the Secretary of Education. They’ve already predicted a lot of 2020, after all:
Gerald Slater, a PBS pioneer, has died from COVID-19.
Alamo Drafthouse is launching Alamo on Demand, a VOD service curated by their employees.
Dish Network has lost more than 400,000 subscribers — which was surprising to me at first: aren’t more people watching TV? It turns out they’re losing airplane and hotel customers, which is a wrinkle I hadn’t considered.
Some over at Fox News are telling protestors to stop showing up with their guns because they are undermining their message. Also, some over at Fox News have apparently forgotten who, exactly, their audience is.
That idiot James O’Keefe is alleging CBS News staged a line of cars at a testing site to make it look longer. CBS News denies the claims.
Please do not cheer on people violating stay-at-home orders while taping from your home office.
Please do not brag about wanting to kill my grandma because you want to go to the zoo.
YouTube has launched a series called Celebrity Substitute in which celebrities serve as substitute teachers for virtual high school classes. Ken Jeong, Bill Nye, Camila Mendes, Janelle Monáe, Karlie Kloss, Ken Jeong, and Terry Crews will participate.
All Other TV News
The Peabody nominees are out and it’s hard to argue with this list. The full list of nominees can be seen here:
- Chernobyl (HBO)
- David Makes Man (OWN)
- Dickinson (Apple TV+)
- Fleabag (Prime Video)
- Float (Disney+)
- Good Omens (Prime Video)
- Our Boys (HBO)
- Ramy (Hulu)
- Stranger Things (Netflix)
- Succession (HBO)
- Unbelievable (Netflix)
- Watchmen (HBO)
- When They See Us (Netflix)
ViacombCBS had a call with investors where they announced they would be rebranding CBS All Access this summer. They are adding more than 100 Paramount films to the platform as of today, and planning to expand going forward. The shows, so far as I can tell, are all safe (for the time being). Also, ViacombCBS made a deal with YouTube to make CBS and Viacom programming available for streaming, including MTV, Pop, Smithsonian Channel and The CW.
Ryan Murphy convinced Macauley Culkin to join the cast of American Horror Story by telling him his character would have “crazy, erotic sex with Kathy Bates.” (But I suspect it wasn’t that hard to get him to sign on, honestly.)
Jason Alexander was offered a bribe by his own publicist for details about the Seinfeld finale. I wonder how often this happens considering how well-connected publicists would be to the media …
Here are a bunch of pictures from a Netflix show I know absolutely nothing about.
You will be able to stream Peacock on your Apple devices when it launches (full-scale) in July.
Sinclair Broadcasting has to pay a $48 million fine to the FCC for pulling shenanigans when it tried to acquire Tribune Media. However, their licenses weren’t pulled, so it’s all pretty much for show.
- The Masked Singer has been renewed at Fox.
- LEGO Masters has been renewed for a second season at Fox.
- After Life has been renewed for a third season at Netflix.
- The Food That Built America has been renewed at History.
- The Men Who Built America has been renewed at History.
- Live PD has been renewed at A&E.
- Project Blue Book and Knightfall have been canceled at History.
- An anthology series from BJ Novak is in the works at FX.
- Dark Days at the Magna Carta starring and produced by Blake Lively has been bought at Netflix.
- Just Beyond, a horror series from R.L. Stine, has been ordered at Disney+.
- The Horror of Dolores Roach is being developed at Amazon.
- Bill Clinton is producing a documentary series about the presidency for History Channel.
- How We Sleep at Night: The Sara Cunningham Story, a movie starring and produced by Jamie Lee Curtis is being developed at Lifetime.
- An untitled Christmas movie starring Betty White is also being developed at Lifetime, and Kelly Rowland will star in a Merry Liddle Christmas Wedding.
- History has ordered two more presidential miniseries: Lincoln and Theodore Roosevelt, you know, those guys no one ever hears much about.
- What’s It Worth? Live and The Quest for Lost WWE Treasures have both been greenlit at A&E.
- Emily in Paris might be moving from Paramount to Netflix.
- A White Collar reboot could be in the works.
- Christina Aguilera, Tituss Burgess, Sabrina Carpenter, Jennifer Hudson, Lang Lang, John Legend, Katy Perry have been added to the performers for The Disney Singalong Volume II on ABC this Sunday.
Mark Your Calendars
- Yellowstone will return on Paramount on June 21.
- Snowpiercer will debut on TBS on May 17.
- Game On! will debut on May 27 on CBS.
- The 100 will return for its final season on The CW on May 20.
- Blackballed will debut on Quibi on May 18.
- Saturday Night Live will air a Mother’s Day special during primetime this Saturday.
- The Wonderful World of Disney will return on ABC on May 20 with Moana.
- Robbie will debut on Comedy Central tonight.
- Da 5 Bloods will debut on Netflix on June 12.
- Bernie Blackout will premiere on Vice on May 13.
- One Man and His Shoes will debut on Vice on May 25.
- The Substitute Top 10 Wildest Pranks will debut on Nickelodeon on May 9.
- Celebrity Family Feud returns on ABC on May 31.
- Buried Worlds with Don Wildman will premiere on Travel Channel on June 8.
Florian Schneider, Co-founder of Kraftwerk
Brian Anthony Howe, Lead singer of Bad Company
Michael McClure, Beat poet
Celebrity Watch Party: Hey, remember that Bravo show, The People’s Couch which would watch people watching TV? It’s that but with celebrities, including Rob Lowe, Meghan Trainor, Joe Buck, Raven-Symoné, Master P and Romeo, JoJo Siwa, Steve Wozniak, Curtis Stone, and Robert and Kym Herjavec. 7 p.m., Fox
Blindspot: Jane must rescue Rich Dotcom from a secret black ops site in the final season premiere. 8 p.m., NBC
Tommy: There’s a CONSPIRACY! Season finale. 9 p.m., CBS
- Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon: Queen Latifah, Pete Davidson, Judd Apatow, James Taylor
- Late Night with Seth Meyers: Kelly Clarkson, Rep. Ayanna Pressley
- The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: Christine Baranski, Tame Impala
- The Late Late Show with James Corden: Laura Linney, Ellie Goulding
- Jimmy Kimmel Live: Courteney Cox
- The Daily Show: The Daily Social Distancing Show
- Conan: Lizzy Caplan
- Watch What Happens Live: Kristin Chenoweth, Tinsley Mortimer
- A Little Late with Lily Singh: Mark Cuban
|ABC||Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?
|How to Get Away With Murder
|Man With a Plan
|In the Dark
|FOX||Celebrity Watch Party
|NBC||Council of Dads
|Law & Order: SVU