As the Traitor-in-Chief calls for his political opponents to be arrested for treason, the whistleblower to be exposed and A GODDAMNED CIVIL WAR, his toadies insist everything is fine.

Hi kids, and welcome to another installment of Impeachment Corner! Because this is ostensibly a TV blog, and not a political blog (but who are we kidding?) we will start with all the president’s lickspittles’ terrible appearances on the Sunday shows trying to tell us that there’s no there there with this Ukraine story. 

Here’s Rep. Jim Jordan trying to direct everyone’s attention to Hunter and Joe Biden only to have Jake Tapper not only call bullshit on this story but also remind us all that Jim Jordan has his own scandal that he might not want to talk about. 

 

Here’s Rep. Kevin McCarthy on 60 Minutes revealing that he didn’t read the damn transcript. (And let me remind you that Rep. Justin Amash, the guy tweeting this, is the former Republican who called for Trump to be impeached and was chased out of the party):

Here’s Fox & Friends‘ Ed Henry pressing Mark Levin on whether he thinks it’s appropriate for the President to press a foreign counterpart for dirt on his opponent and Levin losing his damn mind:

And here is Stephen Miller completely incapable of answering Chris Wallace’s questions:

Side note: LOOK AT THE REPORTERS FACT-CHECKING THESE ASSHOLES IN REAL TIME AND NOT JUST SWALLOWING THEIR CRAZY TALKING POINTS! JOURNALISMS!!! And predictably, President Lawless’ other cronies are SO MAD that journalists ask their guests hard questions (otherwise known as “doing their job”) and are calling NO FAIR. Lol.

Also on the teevees yesterday morning: Robert DeNiro, who was on a promotional tour for his upcoming movie, The Irishman. On CNN, Brian Stelter asked him his thoughts on Fox News, and his response was “Fuck ’em. Fuck ’em.” Except it was live and uncensored and Stelter grasped his pearls.

 

Then there’s the Joe Biden part of this. His campaign has asked network news presidents, chief anchors and Sunday show executive producers at ABC, CBS, NBC, MSNBC, CNN and Fox News to no longer book Rudy Giuliani because he’s a lunatic and a liar who goes on their shows to spread disproven conspiracy theories.

There is ZERO chance they are going to stop booking Rudy Giuliani. He’s TV gold.

But, it should be noted that one of the other Bad Things that happened to the President on the TV this weekend was his former Homeland Security advisor, Tom Bossert, went on the This Week to say that not only is the Biden/Ukraine conspiracy theories a bunch of nonsense, but that he SAID AS MUCH TO PRESIDENT FUNGUS BRAIN TO HIS FACE. He also notes that one of the five ways the president could get himself impeached is to “hire Rudy Giuliani.” 

As you can imagine, our leader is handing all of this with his typical dignity and reserved calm. Wait, I meant he’s decompensating faster than ever. He’s been tweeting and retweeting (sometimes retweeting people who only have two followers, bless his heart) like a maniac all weekend, so I’m just going to point out the most alarming-hilarious-batshit:

First, he called two Jewish congressmen and four congresswomen of color “savages”:

He demanded to know the identity of the whistleblower and the people who gave him the information in the first place — because that is definitely how it works, and I’m sure the whistleblower and their sources would be perfectly safe — AND called for Adam Schiff to be tried for treason all in one particularly unhinged Twitter thread:

But then if that wasn’t dangerous and insane enough, he threatened a civil war if he’s impeached:

TOTALLY NORMAL AND HEALTHY. (Add it to the list, Nancy.)

He called openly for Adam Schiff to be arrested for treason because he does not know what treason is:

“Treason against the United States shall consist only in levying War against them, or in adhering to their Enemies, giving them Aid and Comfort. No Person shall be convicted of Treason unless on the Testimony of two Witnesses to the same overt Act, or on Confession in open Court.”

Then he repeated a bullshit conspiracy theory that the whistleblower law was changed right before this report was filed because that is exactly how laws work. 

And he’s trying to get this hashtag trending, lol:

He also retweeted anything he could find bashing Ed Henry of Fox & Friends (but I’m not going to bore you with those because whatever) because HOW DARE ANYONE ON FOX & FRIENDS DO JOURNALISM?

Oh, and have I mentioned that new polls are showing that the majority of Americans (but just barely) are in favor of impeachment? Can’t imagine why President 45.9% would be sweating.

Meanwhile, a few other related stories that broke over the weekend: 

The State Department is investigating Hillary’s emails. Again.

As many as 130 officials have been contacted in recent weeks by State Department investigators — a list that includes senior officials who reported directly to Clinton as well as others in lower-level jobs whose emails were at some point relayed to her inbox, said current and former State Department officials. Those targeted were notified that emails they sent years ago have been retroactively classified and now constitute potential security violations, according to letters reviewed by The Washington Post.

Nope. Nothing political happening here.

Kurt Volker, the “special envoy” to the Ukraine who was mentioned in the whistleblower report as having facilitated communications between the Ukrainians and Giuliani, has resigned. GEE, KURT, WHY?

Rudy canceled his plans to make a paid appearance at a Kremlin-backed event in Armenia next week which Putin is going to attend. GEE, RUDY, WHY?

The House Intelligence Committee has secured a deal to hear from the whistleblower. Let’s hope their identity isn’t compromised between now and then.

AND NOW IT’S TIME TO GIMME ALL OF THE TELEVISED HEARINGS. MOMMA WANTS MORE TELEVISED HEARINGS. LET’S DO RUDY FIRST.

Other Actual TV news

Supernatural teamed up with Hot Topic to raise money for the non-profit Random Acts of Kindness, which provides relief for Hurricane Dorian survivors, through the sale of a t-shirt. They managed to raise $280,000. Which is great! Good job, everyone!

This is just a very weird reminder that Peaky Blinders returns on Netflix this Friday.

I am including this article about the upcoming second season of You mostly as an excuse to complain that some friends of mine here in Houston recently hosted Penn Badgley at their home AND DID NOT LET ME KNOW. Still pissed.

Bob Iger, the chairman and CEO of Disney, has been on a book tour for the last couple weeks, and in talking to Oprah, he says firing Roseanne Barr was a no-brainer. Yeah, no doubt.

Sorta a How to Get Away with Murder spoiler sorta? But it looks like Karla Souza won’t be back for a little while at least.

Saturday Night Live‘s Aidy Bryant gave a shoutout on her Instagram to the stagehand who accidentally wandered into the sketch I am going to refer to as the “Rice University Sketch”:

This is a very specific story for very specific kind of reader, but if you’re interested in who is writing Saturday Night Live these days, here you go. And for those of you counting: 6 of the 22 writers are women. 6.

This is only sort of related to TV, and it wants makes me want to burn down all social media. So, a guy who went viral on ESPN’s College GameDay holding a sign asking for beer money raised an unexpected ton of cash, and he said he would donate the money to a children’s hospital. Aw! And in fact, he raised $1 million to date. Which is impressive! So the Des Moines Register did a story on him, and in the process dug up some racist tweets the guy made when he was 16, and asked him for a comment about. Instead, the guy held a teary press conference apologizing for the tweets. Unfortunately, the revelation of the tweets ended a partnership he made with Anheuser-Busch to raise money. Boo! BUT THEN, people pissed at the Des Moines Register for ruining a feel-good story looked into the reporter who looked into the guy and GUESS WHAT: he also made racist tweets back in the day, and so the Register fired him. And in conclusion: don’t be racist shitbags and DELETE YO TWEETS.

Holy shit, Batwoman, be careful out there!

Renewals

  • Stranger Things has been renewed for a fourth season at Netflix, because NO DUH.

Cancellations

In Development

Casting News

Mark Your Calendar

  • BoJack Horseman returns on Netflix on October 25.
  • Mrs. Fletcher will debut on HBO on October 27.
  • The War of the Worlds will debut on BBC One sometime this fall.
  • Charmed returns on The CW on October 11.
  • Haunted returns on Netflix on October 11.
  • Deon Cole: Cole Hearted will debut on Netflix on October 8.
  • Ghostwriter will debut on Apple TV+ on November 1.

R.I.P.

Linda Porter, Actress known for her work in Superstore and Twin Peaks, but also a ton of other projects.

Jimmy Nelson, Ventriloquist known for his TV appearances in the 50s and 60s.

José José, Legendary Mexican singer

WATCH THIS

9-1-1: TSUNAMI! 7 p.m., Fox

The Outsiders: Stay golden, Ponyboy.  6 p.m., Sundance

The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: Hillary and Chelsea Clinton swing by to chat with Stephen. I can’t imagine what they might have to talk about. 10:30 p.m., CBS

Late Night:

  • Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon: James Spader, Ruby Rose, Elvis Duran, DaBaby
  • Late Night with Seth Meyers: Chris Hayes, Sean Casey, Kevin Millar, Avril Lavigne, Roy Mayorga
  • The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: Hillary Rodham Clinton, Chelsea Clinton, Wilco
  • The Late Late Show with James Corden: Christian Slater, Kaitlyn Dever, Gary Clark Jr.
  • Jimmy Kimmel Live: Jonathan Van Ness, Lucy Boynton, Jon Pardi
  • The Daily Show: Mark Sanford
  • Lights Out with David Spade: Erin Foster, Sarah Foster, Kevin Nealon
  • Watch What Happens Live: Anastasia Surmava, Aesha Scott
  • A Little Late with Lily Singh: Barbie Ferreira, Alexa Demie

 

MON. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC Dancing with the Stars
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The Good Doctor
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CBS The Neighborhood
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Bob Hearts Abishola
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All Rise
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Bull
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CW Penn & Teller: Fool Us
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Whose Line is it Anyway?
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Whose Line is it Anyway?
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Local
FOX 9-1-1
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Prodigal Son
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News/Local
NBC The Voice
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Bluff City Law
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