Do any of these people who are whining about corporate “wokeness” understand how capitalism works?

It’s Thursday again, and people are out here actually giving their dogs mullets. I have never been more disappointed to have a short-haired dog in my life.


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Black Lives Matter

Last week that main character was Jonathan VanBoskerc, a Las Vegas resident who wrote an editorial for the Orlando Sentinel complaining that Walt Disney World has become too “woke,” and threatening that he and his family won’t be going back. (They will totally be going back.) His evidence of said “wokeness” is that the Pirates of the Caribbean took out a sex trafficking scene, the Jungle Cruise ride took out a racist character, Splash Mountain will change its design scheme from Song of the South to Princess and the Frog, and employees will be allowed to have tattoos and horror of horrors, cut their hair the way they choose. With all of these changes, how can he, a white middle-aged Christian man, be expected to enjoy himself at the park?

“Disney, please return to the values and vision of Walt. The customer experience should be the core of your business model. Immersion should not be sacrificed on the altar of political correctness and appeasing the Twitter mob.”

See, the thing is, the “customer experience” IS the core of Disney’s business model and they’ve determined there are more customers who would like to experience less racism and misogyny in the parks than there are old white dudes who are angry and scared that the world is changing and they aren’t at the center of it anymore. Overhauling rides is an expensive proposition, one that Disney is not going to undertake just to appease a few loud Twitter critics. They must know that it will benefit their profits down the line or they wouldn’t bother doing it. Also, at least two of the changes listed above were to incorporate more synergy between the theme parks and Disney’s more recent movies. It’s called capitalism, something Mr. VanBoskerc and his fellow whiners like Marco Rubio should look into sometime.

A Jeopardy! contestant was accused of making a white power hand signal on the show, and he vigorously denies it, saying he was just signifying his third win.

CNN contributor Rick Santorum is a racist idiot.

Eric Andre claims he was racially profiled at the Atlanta airport recently.

And he got a response from Atlanta Mayor Keisha Bottoms:

Oh, HFPA, y’all really have to do better than this, guys:

I’m going to let this filmmaker’s post speak for itself, just like she let these people speak for themselves:

Things the G.O.P. stands for: giving immunity to people who choose to drive their cars into protestors, you know, like the neo-Nazi who murdered Heather Heyer in Charlottesville, Virginia. Many bills are being passed across the country that are being labeled “anti-riot” bills, but are really thinly disguised attacks on the First Amendment right of freedom of assembly. And here’s Fox News idiot Brian Kilmeade arguing that protestors against police brutality should be denied the use of 911.

Speaking of police brutality, this horrific story happened in my own backyard, but this was the first I had heard of it: in 2015, Harris County officers pulled over a female African-American college student, and in a gas station parking lot, body slammed her before proceeding to search her for drugs by stripping her naked, shoving her head beneath a car, forcing her legs apart and searching her vaginal area for a full 11 minutes. It was entirely caught on dashcam, and yet two of the three cops were cleared of all criminal charges and the third was never charged at all. The woman in question recently settled her civil rights lawsuit against Harris County, and all three cops are still on the Harris County force.

Also, police brutality is not limited to people of color.

A study by UCLA suggests that actors of color were in 42% of all movie roles, and 39.7% of lead roles, which is a marked improvement in representation. Let’s see if the trend maintains when it’s not a weird pandemic year.

The Theatre Leadership Project (TTLP) has been launched by a group of Broadway producers along with the Black Theatre Coalition and Columbia University’s Prince Fellowship. It aims to train a new generation of Black theater leaders.

Whoopi Goldberg is writing a comic book whose hero is an older Black woman. Heaven knows they are the ones who saved us from Former President Circus Peanut.

All Other TV News

Ewan McGregor SWEARS the Obi-Won series isn’t going to be as stilted and tedious as the prequel movies.

The Boys season three is using three times as much blood as last season. You’ve been warned.

Netflix has launched its “Play Something” button to boss you around.

HBO Max’s ad-supported level is still going to cost you $9.99 a month.

CBS continues kicking the other networks’ asses.

If you’ve read and watched Shadow and Bone, the series’ showrunners explain why they made those changes here.

We have our first look at Sarah Paulson as Linda Tripp in Impeachment: American Crime Story and people are SO MAD because Paulson is wearing a fat suit. The criticism here is that they should have hired a fat actress instead, but it’s Sarah Paulson? Who is great? And who has a long history working with Ryan Murphy? I get the problem, I understand that this was an opportunity that could have gone to a larger actress, but, again, it’s Sarah Paulson, so I’m not sure where I come down on this one. 

A woman won a house in Jimmy Buffet’s Margaritaville on Wheel of Fortune, the poor thing.

Your daily House of the Dragon set photos are here.

The reason The View did not discuss the Hunter Biden “scandal” is that there was no there, there, you nitwit. But speaking of, there is a scandal related to Ukraine and Hunter Biden, it’s just not the one the Right expected. (Though the rest of us had a good idea.)

Speaking of, Saturday Night Live has to bring Will Ferrell on to play this asshole, right?

Mike Lindell was on Jimmy Kimmel Live! last night and Kimmel referenced Lindell’s prior crack use a whole bunch.

Poor Ted Cruz brought a complete lack of a sense of humor to a battle of wits. It didn’t go well for him:

Frankly, it was remarkable Ted was able to stay awake long enough to tweet at The Daily Show.

Oh yeah, President Biden addressed Congress and the country last night and he was great and didn’t talk about cancer-causing windmills once!

Congratulations, Hannah Gadsby!

Going Viral

Here are some photos of families reuniting at nursing homes. Now stop crying and go get that jab, y’all.

More and more colleges will require students to be vaccinated when they return in the fall. GOOD.

The Tonight Show is launching a six-episode miniseries about how the show dealt with the pandemic.

New York City is shooting to be fully reopened by July — except for Broadway. Not so fast, Broadway.

And Alamo Drafthouse is reopening 15 locations, backing away from bankruptcy.

France is beginning their reopening with cinemas, restaurants, and cafes beginning on May 19. The idea is to try to get the country reopened by the time Cannes rolls around in July.

Former President Has-been is out here crying that no one is giving him credit for the vaccine. And it’s true: Operation Warp Speed helped speed up the development of the Moderna and Johnson & Johnson vaccine, but it had nothing to do with the first approved vaccine, which was from Pfizer, who took no federal grant money, so, you know.

Also, there’s this:

Trump spent the last 10 months of his presidency publicly undermining science, safety protocols, and the overall threat posed by the virus. In November, it was reported that he had not attended a coronavirus task force meeting in at least five months, ducking out of active involvement in his administration’s response during much of 2020 and then using his final months in office to try overturning the election he clearly lost. All of which left Biden with a dire mess to clean up upon taking office, a transition that occurred during the third and deadliest wave of infections in the U.S. Still, more than 200 million vaccine shots have been administered in Biden’s first 100 days. 


  • Invincible has been renewed for a second season on Amazon.

In Development

Casting News

Mark Your Calendars

  • Betty returns on HBO in June. And they are still cooler than you.
  • Hacks will debut on HBO Max on May 13.
  • Sweet Tooth will debut on Netflix on June 4.
  • Blue Miracle premieres on Netflix on May 27.
  • Inside, a socially-distanced comedy special from Bo Burnham, is coming to Netflix soon.

  • The Kominsky Method returns on Netflix on May 28.
  • In Our Mothers’ Gardens will premiere on Netflix on May 6.


Shunsuke Kikuchi, Composer for the Dragon Ball series

Michael Collins, Apollo 11 pilot, and father of All My Children actress, Kate Collins


Mosquito Coast: Justin Theroux and Melissa George star in this new adaptation of the Paul Theroux novel. (I will just note that the reviews have not been particularly positive for the series, many comparing it to a watered-down Ozark, but I love me some Justin Theroux, so there you go.) Series premiere. Apple TV+

Things Heard & Seen: Amanda Seyfried stars in this haunted house movie: “A Manhattan couple moves to a historic hamlet in the Hudson Valley and comes to discover that their marriage has a sinister darkness, one that rivals their new home’s history. Based on the acclaimed novel by Elizabeth Brundage.” Premiere. Netflix

The Big Shot with Bethenny: Bethenny Frankel turns the search for her second-in-command into a reality competition. Sure, why not. Premiere. HBO Max

Tom Clancy’s Without Remorse: Michael B. Jordan stars in this film adaptation of the Tom Clancy novel, which is as much information you really need, right? FINE. He’s an elite Navy SEAL who, while seeking justice for the murder of his pregnant girlfriend, uncovers a plot that could cause an all-out war between the U.S. and Russia. So, your typical Woman in Refrigerator plotline. Premiere. Amazon

Chasing Ocean Giants: Patrick Dykstra chases whales around. Premiere. Discovery+

Let’s Be Real: Robert Smiegel is behind the American version of the classic U.K. puppet series Splitting Image. WARNING: There will be a Ted Cruz puppet, so prepare yourself. Series premiere. 8 p.m., Fox

Impractical Jokers: Season 9. 9 p.m., TruTV

NFL Draft: I will never understand why anyone would want to watch any draft, but it’s going to be broadcast across three different networks, so clearly I’m in the minority here. By the way, the Draft continues on Friday and Saturday nights. 7 p.m., ABC, ESPN, NFLN

Late Night:

  • Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon: Michael B. Jordan, Impractical Jokers, Coi Leary
  • Late Night with Seth Meyers: Leslie Jordan, Ashnikko featuring Princess Nokia
  • The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: Mila Kunis, Sara Kays
  • The Late Late Show with James Corden: Brian Tyree Henry, Tom Grennan
  • Jimmy Kimmel Live: Maya Rudolph, Malcolm Gladwell, Kings of Leon
  • The Daily Show: The Daily Social Distancing Show
  • Watch What Happens Live: Lionel Richie
  • A Little Late with Lily Singh: Rupi Kaur
THUR 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
CBS Young Sheldon
United States of Al
B Positive
CW People Presents: William & Kate’s Royal Anniversary
People Presents: Harry & Meghan’s American Dream
FOX Name That Tune
Last Man Standing
Let’s Be Real
NBC Manifest
Law & Order Special Victims Unit

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