It’s Friday which means another week down and three more to go until Election Day. Again: vote in person and early if you can, and if you’re mailing in your vote: WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? PUT A STAMP ON THAT SUCKER AND DROP IT OFF. The more votes we can get in before November 3, the fewer votes that spray-painted goon can contest.
— PACRONYM (@PACRONYM) October 8, 2020
We have an update on the pandemic from our favorite time traveler:
Grey’s Anatomy and Station 19 pay tribute to essential workers in their first promo of the season:
Jack White will be Saturday Night Live‘s musical guest after that dum-dum Morgan Wallen had to drop out.
Netflix’s Vikings: Valhalla has resumed production after a number of false positives.
Pixar’s next movie, Soul, is now going to debut on Disney+ on Christmas Day, instead of waiting for movie theaters to return.
Meanwhile, the National Association of Theater Owners is asking Americans to write letters to Congress, begging them to help save the movie theater business. And I’m deeply sympathetic to this cause, as I am to any industry that has been hard hit by this virus. But, as this piece suggests, NATO kinda put themselves in this position by being weirdly rigid about things like release dates and just how important they are to culture in general.
Speaking of industries I’m sympathetic towards: Broadway. (And I hate Broadway musicals!)
And WarnerMedia is looking at another round of layoffs thanks to the virus.
You know what? It’s been a week. So I’m going to leave you one serious post and then give you some laffs, because Jesus Christ, I can’t take anymore.
In this very interesting piece, the writer compares Fox News to serialized dramas like Lost, explaining the network’s appeal is in its web of conspiracies and characters and the narratives the network creates for them. It’s really insightful for those of us who have relatives completely addicted to this shit.
Related to the above, I encourage you to read this funny but also infuriating Twitter thread by Molly McKew, a Russian interference expert and writer who watched and live-tweeted Tucker Carlson’s and Sean Hannity’s shows last night. Things neither show discussed until President CoughsALot called in to Hannity: a right-wing terrorist group’s plot to kidnap a sitting Governor, and COVID-19 (and when President Grand Wizard did discuss Governor Whitmer, it was to attack her for being “ungrateful”). They didn’t discuss either story — the two biggest stories of the day — because they didn’t fit the narrative they need to construct.
I’m really stuck on this thing where FoxNews refused to cover the most significant story of the day—the most significant domestic terrorism plot *in years*—in prime time because it doesn’t fit the editorial narrative they are using to mindf*ck Americans toward political violence https://t.co/KwTyAWCl4e
— Molly McKew (@MollyMcKew) October 9, 2020
But Laura Ingraham (who’s show McKew could not make herself watch because ENOUGH) did mention Whitmer only to claim that the men who were arrested in the plot against her look like “anarchists” and not right-wingers, and then goes on to blame the Black Lives Matter protestors, somehow, to this violent plot. I should point out, Black Lives Matter and the protestors did not make plans to kidnap and execute anyone:
Laura Ingraham claims the people involved in the plot to kidnap Whitmer look like anarchists and not right-wingers pic.twitter.com/fSV0ESc30X
— Acyn Torabi (@Acyn) October 9, 2020
Anyway. Enjoy these videos of President Used Car Salesman:
— The Lincoln Project (@ProjectLincoln) October 8, 2020
Come on down to Typhoid Donny's Auto Emporium! pic.twitter.com/iuv5hvC7PD
— Parker Molloy (@ParkerMolloy) October 8, 2020
America CEO Don Trump is all better thanks to Regeneron! pic.twitter.com/K6ZsshT96I
— The Daily Show (@TheDailyShow) October 8, 2020
All Other TV News
We need to talk about this new online gambling site ad which features John Goodman as a talking fingertip:
I have not been so traumatized since this Kerasal ad that featured a woman who had feet for hands:
But at least the women who had feet for hands wasn’t a well-respected actress with multiple Emmy, Golden Globes, and Screen Actors Guild nominations who is currently leading the cast of a popular network show. I have so many questions for John Goodman, namely: WHAT IS GOING ON, JOHN GOODMAN? WHO TALKED YOU INTO THIS? DO YOU OWE SOMEONE MONEY? ARE THEY BLACKMAILING YOU? AND WHY A TALKING FINGERTIP? DID YOU THINK THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA WHEN YOU SAW THE SCRIPT? AND WHO’S IDEA WAS THIS TO BEGIN WITH? HOW MANY ADULTS HAD TO SIGN OFF ON THIS BEFORE IT WAS MADE? AND HOW MANY ADULTS HAD TO SAY, “Yep, looks great, let’s send this to the networks” WHEN THEY SAW YOUR CGI’D FINGERTIP FACE IN ACTION? WHY, JUST WHY?
(By the way: do not go to YouTube and search “Kerasal feet for hands.” Just … trust me.)
And to cleanse your brain of the nightmare fuel I’ve just poured all over it, here’s a woman in another new ad, talking into her purse like a lunatic:
And while we’re talking bad TV ad decisions, this 4-minute documentary about the ad campaign that literally bankrupted a national chain restaurant is fascinating:
The Bachelorette is coming for us next week, ready or not. If you don’t read RealitySteve, here’s what we know about this season so far.
Congratulations, John Oliver!
— Mayor Mark Boughton (@MayorMark) October 8, 2020
The Watchmen creator Alan Moore is back with a new movie and possibly TV show, called The Show — but he insists he is done with comics, and no, he does not have anything to say about Watchmen. (But boy, I wish he’d watch it.)
Roku channels are now available on Amazon Fire — which doesn’t make sense, except it does.
Your chance to get a free trial of Apple TV+ has been extended into February. (And I recommend you take advantage of it, if only to watch Ted Lasso, which is a charming delight.)
- Dickinson has been renewed for a third season on Apple TV+.
- Jurassic World: Camp Cretaceous has been renewed for season two at Netflix.
- Accused: Guilty or Innocent? has been renewed on A&E for a second season.
- I Hate Suzie, British dramedy, has been picked up by HBO Max.
- The Memory Police will be turned into a movie by Charlie Kaufman for Amazon.
- Jensen and Daneel Ackles have created a production company, Chaos Machine Productions, and have signed an overall deal with Warner Bros. Television.
- Battle: Freestyle, a sequel to the Norwegian dance feature Battle is in the works at Netflix.
- James Patterson has signed a first-look deal with studio eOne, and an adaptation of his novel The Noise will be the first project produced.
- Terry O’Quinn and Amy Carlson are joining the cast of FBI: Most Wanted on CBS.
- Kate Mulgrew is joining the voice cast of Star Trek: Prodigy as her Star Trek: Voyager character Captain Kathryn Janeway.
- Brooke Smith, Jeffrey Joseph, Gage Marsh, and Gabriel Jacob-Cross are joining the cast of Big Sky on ABC.
- Derek Webster is joining 9-1-1: Lone Star on Fox.
- Andrew Richardson is joining the cast of Triage on ABC.
- Victoria Justice and Midori Francis will star in Afterlife of the Party on Netflix.
- Helena Bonham Carter will narrate the animated series Clown for Channel 4.
Mark Your Calendar
- The West Wing Reunion will debut on HBO Max on October 15.
- The Stand will premiere on CBS All Access on December 17.
- The Expanse will return on Amazon on December 16.
- Invincible will premiere on Amazon in 2021.
- American Selfie: One Nation Shoots Itself will debut on Showtime on October 23.
- Leap of Faith will debut on Shudder on November 19.
- Wolfwalkers will debut on Apple TV+ on December 11.
- Alice in Borderland will premiere on Netflix on December 10.
- El Cid will premiere on Amazon soon.
- Superstore returns on October 29.
— 👻 ᔕᑭOOKY, ᔕᑕᗩᖇY ᔕᑌᑭEᖇᔕTOᖇE 🎃 (@NBCSuperstore) October 8, 2020
- Snowpiercer will return on TNT on January 25.
- By Whatever Means Necessary: The Times of Godfather of Harlem will return on EPIX on November 8.
- The Power of We: A Sesame Street Special will debut on HBO Max and PBS on October 15.
- Slugfest will debut on Quibi on November 9.
William “Bill” Bernstein, Co-founder of Orion Pictures
Tommy Rall, Actor and dancer
Whitey Ford, Legendary Yankees pitcher
The Haunting of Bly Manor: SIRI, CLEAR MY CALENDAR. Premiere. Netflix
The Right Stuff: I don’t know. The Right Stuff is a pretty perfect movie. But what do I know? Series premiere. Disney+
Deaf U: A group of deaf and hearing-impaired students at Gallaudet University shares their stories in this docuseries. Premiere. Netflix
Room 104: Series finale. 10 p.m., HBO
Ghostwriter: Season premiere. Apple TV+
Saturday Night Live: Bill Burr and Jack White. 10:30 p.m., NBC
Cats: The most terrifying movie of the Halloween season arrives. 7 p.m., HBO
Eli Roth’s History of Horror: Season premiere. Shudder
Fear the Walking Dead: Morgan has to decide whether or not to help a desperate stranger in the season premiere. 8 p.m., AMC
Spanish Princess: Season premiere. 7 p.m., Starz
Top Gear: Season premiere. 7 p.m., BBC America
- Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon (Friday): Kevin James, Lenny Kravitz, Nate Bargatze
- Jimmy Kimmel Live! (Friday): Liam Neeson, Killer Mike, Norah Jones
- The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: (Friday): Allison Janney, Richard Schiff, Martin Sheen, Bradley Whitford, and Aaron Sorkin
|CBS||The Greatest #AtHome Videos
|CW||Masters of Illusion
|Masters of Illusion
|World’s Funniest Animals
|World’s Funniest Animals
|FOX||Friday Night Smackdown||Local|
|NBC||American Ninja Warrior
|CBS||FBI: Most Wanted
|48 Hours||48 Hours||News/Local|
|Saturday Night Live
(Bill Burr & Jack White)
|Jimmy Kimmel Live!: Game Night
|CBS||60 Minutes||60 Minutes||Clueless|
|Bless the Harts
|NBC||Sunday Night Football