Fox News is eating itself as impeachment looms. You love to see it.

by Therese Odell, posted in Uncategorized

Grab the popcorn, because today in Impeachment Corner, Vanity Fair is reporting that Fox News is finding itself in a bit of a pickle over this whole impeachment mess and aren’t sure what to do: distance themselves from President Liability or throw themselves over his squishy orange body.

According to the article, which you should read in full because ~chef’s kiss~ so delicious, Fox News was already having tummy trouble with the president, who had become increasingly furious with them for their (accurate) polls that show him underwater, and taking to Twitter to tantrum about it:

But now with this Ukrainian scandal, a downright existential crisis has taken hold at the cable news network:

This morning, Sean Hannity told friends the whistle-blower’s allegations are “really bad,” a person briefed on Hannity’s conversations told me. (Hannity did not respond to a request for comment). And according to four sources, Fox Corp CEO Lachlan Murdoch is already thinking about how to position the network for a post-Trump future. A person close to Lachlan told me that Fox News has been the highest rated cable network for seventeen years, and “the success has never depended on any one administration.” (A Fox Corp spokesperson declined to comment.)

But it gets better! So, this week, Fox personalities had a slap fight on-air after Shep Smith had Judge Andrew Napolitano, Fox’s Senior Judicial Analyst, on his show on Tuesday, where Napolitano said, “YEP, PRESIDENT DINGDONG COMMITTED A CRIME, Y’ALL.” Because it’s a crime for a president to solicit aid for his campaign from a foreign government. It’s just that fucking simple.

Then, that evening, that bowtie-wearing dipshit, Tucker Carlson he has Former U.S. Attorney Joe diGenova on his show to call Napolitano “a fool.”

But did Shep Smith take that lying down? NO, HE DID NOT, and on Wednesday, he went on-air and said: “Last night on this network during primetime opinion programming, a partisan guest who supports President Trump was asked about Judge Napolitano’s legal assessment, and when he was asked, he said unchallenged, ‘Judge Napolitano is a fool.’ Attacking our colleague who is here to offer legal assessments on our air in our work home is repugnant.”

DRAG HER, SHEP. DRAG HER.

Now, according to the Vanity Fair article, Fox News’ CEO and the president of the network told Shep to stop attacking Tucker or he’d be pulled off the air, so it’s not like Fox News has suddenly become rational. That said, Chris Wallace began trending on Twitter today for the novel reason that he told the truth on the network:

And apparently, one of the anti-President DumDum voices at Fox News is new board member Paul Ryan, who, according to an executive quoted in the article: “is embarrassed about Trump and now he has the power to do something about it.” YES. THAT PAUL RYAN. THE FORMER SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE PAUL RYAN. HE NOW FEELS LIKE HE CAN FINALLY DO SOMETHING ABOUT THE CONSTITUTION-VIOLATER-IN-CHIEF.

I mean, whatever. I’m going to just swallow my rage at the fecklessness of Republicans who know PERFECTLY WELL that this man is a fucking disaster and threat to our nation but refuse to do anything about it because judges or whatever goddamned bullshit and instead enjoy watching the spectacle of Fox News tearing itself apart. Couldn’t happen to a shittier organization.

Meanwhile, President Treason, he’s super pissed off about this whole whistleblower thing and started openly fantasizing about having the people who told the whistleblower about his call with Ukraine — a call, which he will have you know, is perfect — executed.

So that’s super cool. Just add “witness tampering” to the articles, Nancy.

As for today, President Very Good Brain is having a very normal, not stressed-out at all day:

OK, so many hilarious things: 

  1. “discribing”
  2. Liddle’ is no more a word than Liddle
  3. That is what we call an “apostrophe” not a “hyphen,” you fucking moron.
  4. And adding the apostrophe to the word “Liddle” — which is still not a word — does not convey additional meaning

I’m afraid CNN wins this round, Nitwit.

Oh! And before I move on to actual TV news, this is a completely fascinating Slate article about a pee tape that has been floating around on the internet. Spoiler alert: The tape is fake but really convincing and someone went a long way to make look very real, probably in an attempt to trap someone in the FAKE NEWS MEDIA into reporting it as being The Pee Tape, so they could be exposed as being FAKE NEWS! But who would go through the trouble? Someone like Roger Stone? The Russians? Dummy Junior? Anyway, this is definitely worth a read.

The next Democratic presidential debate will only be on one night, not split over two, thank God. On the downside, as of now, it looks like 12 candidates will qualify to participate which, eeeeesh.

Jennifer Lopez and Shakira are going to be your Super Bowl Halftime show acts. Let me know how it goes.

Amazon is SO HOPEFUL Phoebe Waller-Bridge will make more Fleabag. (Phoebe Waller-Bridge is not going to make more Fleabag.)

NBC has launched “Squadroom,” a Law & Order: SVU podcast in case you just haven’t had enough SVU each week.

Interesting: Like Netflix, Apple plans to release their films in theaters, but unlike Netflix, they will release them in theaters weeks before the films will stream on Apple TV+.

Time’s Up

Cardi B opened up about being sexually assaulted on the set of a photoshoot for a magazine early in her career. “When I see the #MeToo movement, there’s girls from the ‘hood I know that went through the same type of treatment. … It happens really every day.”

Plácido Domingo has withdrawn all his future performances at the Metropolitan Opera in the midst of his sexual harassment scandal.

Apparently, a racist misogynist won Big Brother? I don’t watch the show, so I don’t know who this concrete block is?

Renewals

Cancellations

In Development

Casting News

Mark Your Calendar

  • The Irishman will debut on Netflix and in theaters on November 1.
  • For All Mankind will launch (~pun highfive~) on Apple TV+ on November 1.
  • The Flash will return on The CW on October 8.

R.I.P.

Robert Garrison, Actor in The Karate Kid 

WATCH THIS

FRIDAY

American Housewife: The family sells the minivan. Season premiere. 7 p.m., ABC

Hawaii Five-0: Mob bosses are targeted for assassination. Season premiere. 7 p.m., CBS

Fresh Off the Boat: Louis and Eddie team up to give Evan “the talk.” Season premiere. 7:30 p.m., ABC

Magnum P.I.: Magnum investigates a missing persons case while waiting for Higgins to decide whether or not to be his partner. Season premiere. 8 p.m., CBS

Blue Bloods: Danny and Baez deal with a year-old homicide investigation. Season premiere. 9 p.m., CBS

The Politician: In Ryan Murphy’s first Netflix prject, a high-school student with grand political ambitions deals with the treacherous politics in his school. Series premiere. Netflix

Transparent: Musical Finale R.I.P. Maura. Series finale. Amazon 

Van Helsing: Vanessa and Lily return to the real world in the season premiere. 9 p.m., Syfy

SATURDAY

Saturday Night Live: Woody Harrelson & Billie Eilish. Season premiere.10:30 p.m., NBC

Twilight marathon: OK, OK, these movies are terrible, I agree. But have you seen the baby? Because she makes it all worth it. 12:35 p.m., VH1

SUNDAY

America’s Funniest Home Videos: Season premiere. 6 p.m., ABC

60 Minutes: Season premiere. 6:30 p.m., CBS

The Simpsons: Bart and Homer become viral sensations. Season premiere. 7 p.m., Fox

Bless the Harts: Jenny discovers Betty has a potentially profitable secret. Series premiere. 7:30 p.m., Fox

God Friended Me: Season premiere. 7:30 p.m., CBS

Shark Tank: Season premiere. 8 p.m., ABC

Bob’s Burgers: Bob tries to surprise Linda for their anniversary. Season premiere. 8 p.m., Fox

Family Guy: Peter is nervous he is about to be fired. Season premiere. 8:30 p.m., Fox

NCIS: Los Angeles: Callen and Sam partner with Navy Capt. Harmon Rabb Jr. to catch spies. Season premiere. 8:30 p.m., CBS

The Rookie: Officer Bradford fights for his life. Season premiere. 9 p.m., ABC

Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge: Adventure Awaits: A look at the AMAZING new Star Wars land at the Disney parks. 7 p.m., Freeform

Preacher: The fate of the world is determined. Series finale. 9:14 p.m., AMC

Godfather of Harlem: Bumpy Johnson returns home from Alcatraz, looking to retake his Harlem territory from an Italian mob boss. Series premiere. 9 p.m., Epix

Late Night:

  • Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon (Friday): Billie Eilish, Sebastian Maniscalco
  • The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: (Friday): Patricia Heaton, Tegan & Sara
  • Watch What Happens Live (Sunday): Dr. Heavenly Kimes, Dr. Jackie Walters

 

FRI. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC American Housewife
(new)		 Fresh Off the Boat
(new)		 20/20
(new)
CBS Hawaii Five-0
(new)		 Magnum P.I.
(new)		 Blue Bloods
(new)
CW Masters of Illusion
(new)		 The Big Stage
(new)		 Peaking
(new)		 Peaking
(new)		 Local
FOX Smackdown’s Greatest Hist
(new)		 Prodigal Son
(repeat)		 Local
NBC Bluff City Law(repeat) Dateline
(new)

—

SAT. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30 10:00 10:30 11:00 11:30
ABC College Football
(live)		 News/Local
CBS NCIS: New Orleans
(repeat)		 48 Hours
(new)		 48 Hours
(new)		 News/Local
FOX MLB Baseball
(live)		 News/Local
NBC The Voice
(repeat)		 Dateline News/Local Saturday Night Live
(repeat)

—

SUN. 6:00 6:30 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC America’s Funniest Home Videos
(new)		 Celebrity Family Feud
(new)		 Shark Tank
(new)		 The Rookie
(new)
CBS NFL
(new)		 60 Minutes
(new)		 God Friended Me
(new)		 NCIS: Los Angeles
(new)		 Madam Secretary
(repeat)
The CW Local iHeartRadio MusicFestival Greatest Hits
(new)		 Mysteries Decoded
(new)		 Local
FOX The Simpsons
(repeat)		 Bob’s Burgers
(repeat)		 The Simpsons
(new)		 Bless the Harts
(new)		 Bob’s Burgers
(new)		 Family Guy
(new)		 Local/News
NBC Sunday Night Football
(live)

 

One thought on “Fox News is eating itself as impeachment looms. You love to see it.”

Leave a Reply