Season 8 of Game of Thrones will, in fact, have a full trailer. Every story about this I’ve seen has lead with, “There will be a Game of Thrones trailer, BUT THE CREATORS ARE NOT HAPPY ABOUT IT.” But that’s not really the story? Yes, Benioff and Weiss admit that they kinda wish they could just let the audience watch the series cold, but they also admit that when they saw a trailer for Westworld, “… it looked great. And we’re like, ‘Ah, we should do that.’” So, there you go. There will be a trailer, and Benioff and Weiss are probably fine with it. Based on the amount of time between when last season’s trailer debuted and the season seven premiere (53 days), my guess is the season eight trailer debuts sometime in mid-to-late February. ~looks at calendar, throws dart~ I’m going to say February 13. Maybe February 20.
While we wait for that trailer, I built a gallery for you to help you remember where we left all of our favorite characters in season seven. Those who didn’t die, that is.
Kit Harington is keeping that statue of Jon Snow from the teaser trailer, but it’s out in the garage. He intends to turn it into a water feature, which is fine, but dude, if I had a Stark funerary statue of myself, that shit would be IN THE LIVING ROOM.
Apparently, Netflix’s Bird Box used actual footage from the 2013 Lac-Mégantic rail disaster in which a train carrying crude oil derailed in Quebec, causing a vast fire that killed some 40 people. The footage was used in Netflix’s show Travelers, as well, and when they were criticized for it, Netflix removed the footage. They are not going to do so with Bird Box, for some reason.
And thanks to the dumb Bird Box challenge, YouTube has banned all dangerous challenges and pranks, like the Tide Pod challenge and the “Fire Challenge” which … wait, am I reading this right? “where people poured lighter fluid on their bodies and set themselves on fire.” WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU GOD DAMNED IDIOTS?
I finally got around to watching True Detective and it’s alright. It’s fine. It feels like a washed-out retread of season one, but it’s better than season two, so it’s got that going for it. Anyway, this is a good roundup of clues in the first two episodes that you might have missed. Also, Nick Pizzolatto is threatening us with a “really, really wild” idea for season four. HOW ABOUT WE JUST GET THROUGH SEASON THREE. NICK.
I don’t understand anything about this Don Cheadle/Kathy Griffin fight. To quote them both, “Huh?” Is this a promotion for Cheadle’s upcoming series Black Monday? Because if so, I don’t get it.
Oh, Millie Bobby Brown. Sweetie, you are young and you will learn better, but you really should not be defending Joe on You. Even Penn Badgley is like, “DO NOT ROOT FOR MY CHARACTER, HE’S A CREEP.” Keep watching, baby girl, you’ll see(but you really should have picked up on the fact that he’s a creepy stalker from the first episode when he was acting like a creepy stalker because he’s a creepy stalker).
And as for you, Noah Centineo, no, Logan Paul is not a “beautiful man.” Come on.
Sinclair Broadcasting is getting into the streaming business. Hard pass.
Sweet, sweet Michael Strahan, honey, Donald Trump is not a billionaire.
And this isn’t so much a TV story as a story that happened on TV, but Rudy Giuliani is moving those goalposts again, now claiming he never said there was no collusion between the Trump campaign and the Russians, just that Trump himself wasn’t involved with any collusion. LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL. By the time Robert Mueller releases his report, Giuliani is going to be saying that he never claimed Trump wasn’t a Russian asset, just that there is nothing wrong with treason. BOB, LET’S SEE YOUR REPORT ALREADY.
#MeToo
According to Neal Brennan, one of the writers on Chappelle’s Show, R. Kelly’s goons wanted to beat up Chappelle after the famous “Piss on You” sketch aired. Which, yes, I totally believe that. Still, it would be nice if Chappelle could just tweet or say, “What R. Kelly did is bad,” when he is asked — because people are asking — it just is not that hard, right John Legend?
Note to Kanye: This applies to you, too. Stop defending R. Kelly and Michael Jackson, that’s gross. And yes, we all know that’s what you were doing, no matter what Kim might have to say about it in an attempt to save The Brand™.
Sashseer Zamata took on Louis C.K. in a recent stand-up set and it’s so fucking great, I may never mention him again because there will never be a burn as good as this:
“It’s like you go to your favorite restaurant, and instead of getting chicken that you ordered, they serve you pigeon. … It may taste the same at first, but the more you chew on it, the more you realize the quality has decreased. And then if you try to complain about it to the manager, he takes his dick out and calls you the N-word.”
“You can’t just get up onstage and say blatantly racist, transphobic, victim-blaming statements without a punch line! Like, who are you — all of our uncles?”
“He says that the survivors of the shootings shouldn’t be spending their time talking to Congress about gun control. Instead they should be ‘finger-fucking’ each other. But who’s to say they’re not? They can do both! They’re teenagers — of course they’re finger-fucking each other! … They just know how to separate sex from work, which I understand is a hard concept for Louie to grasp.”
Regarding the misconduct allegations on the set of SMILF, Frankie Shaw says she was “learning on the go.” OK. Just do better.
Speaking of doing better, Citigroup. Come on. Come on, Citigroup:
Today, we’re also being transparent about another piece of information. We’ve calculated our unadjusted or “raw” pay gap for women and U.S. minorities—which measures the difference in median total compensation when we don’t adjust for factors such as job function, level, and geography. This analysis shows that the median pay for women globally is 71 percent of the median for men, and the median pay for U.S. minorities is 93 percent of the median for non-minorities.
In Development
- The Story of Us has received a pilot order from CBS.
- Shangri-La, a documentary about Rick Rubin, is being made for Showtime.
- Life for Kids is being developed into a children’s series.
Casting News
- January Jones will star in Spinning Out on Netflix.
Mark Your Calendars
- Broad City returns for the final season on Comedy Central on January 24.
- Happy! returns on Syfy on March 27 and … uh … just watch the trailer:
- Black Earth Rising will debut on Netflix on January 25.
- Undeniable with Dan Patrick will return on Audience on January 30.
- You Me Her will return on Audience on April 9.
R.I.P.
Bruce Tufeld, Agent and manager
WATCH THIS
Supernatural: Michael’s back in charge of Dean. Knew it couldn’t be that easy. 7 p.m., The CW
Discovery of Witches: Vampires and witches get it on in this series. Series premiere. Sundance Now
Star Trek: Discovery: Emo Spock is emo. Season premiere. CBS All Access
Lip Sync Battle: The Queer Eye guys lip sync for their lives. Season premiere. 8 p.m., Paramount
Grey’s Anatomy: Mid-season premiere. 7 p.m., ABC
A Million Little Things: Mid-season premiere. 8 p.m., ABC
How to Get Away With Murder: Mid-season premiere. 9 p.m., ABC
Late Night:
- Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon: Rachel Brosnahan, Howie Mandel, Roy Wood Jr.
- Late Night with Seth Meyers: Michael Strahan, Penn & Teller, Jason McGerr
- The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: Sarah Paulson, Killer Mike, Future
- The Late Late Show with James Corden: Vanessa Hudgens, Andrew Rannells
- Jimmy Kimmel Live: Regina King, Jon Bernthal
- The Daily Show: Don Cheadle
- Busy Tonight: Sarah Chalke
- Watch What Happens Live: Chrissy Teigen, John Legend
| THURS | 7:00 | 7:30 | 8:00 | 8:30 | 9:00 | 9:30 |
| ABC | Grey’s Anatomy (new) |
A Million Little Things (new) |
How to Get Away with Murder (new) |
| CBS | The Big Bang Theory (new) |
Young Sheldon (new) |
Mom (new) |
FAM (new) |
S.W.A.T. (new) |
| CW | Supernatural (new) |
Legacies (new) |
News/Local |
| FOX | Gotham (new) |
The Orville (new) |
News/Local |
| NBC | The Titan Games (new) |
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (new) |
The Good Place (new) |
Law & Order: SVU (new) |
“Kit Harington is keeping that statue of Jon Snow … He intends to turn it into a water feature …”
Think he’ll set it up like one of those little boy fountains?
-Jim