Mayim Bialik is out here trying to lose this ‘Jeopardy!’ hosting gig by driving the viewers insane

 

This is the cutest snowboarding dinosaur you’ve ever seen or your money back.

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Vanity Fair‘s Hillary Busis brought this 10-year-old NBC promo to my attention for the first time, and, you guys, I’ve never seen anything so cursed.

The spot aired in 2012 during Super Bowl XLVI, and featured the casts of NBC’s then biggest shows and news personalities singing “Brotherhood of Man” from the Broadway show How to Get Ahead in Business for reasons that are absurdly unclear.

The promo wants to have it both ways: both as a gesture of sincerity, but all the while winking at the audience to let the more cynical amongst us know that they’re in on the “joke”? Whatever the hell that is?

But that’s not the worst part. The worst part is the cast of garbage men marching through this thing as a grim reminder of how much has changed in the past decade. There’s Matt Lauer; there’s CeeLo Green; there’s Chris D’Elia; there are Aziz Ansari and Chris Pratt who aren’t bad people, but whose once affable characters have been shaded recently; front and center is Alec Baldwin who is at the center of a terrible tragedy; and, of course, there’s also the Former Insurrectionist in Chief, pointing at the camera, threatening to fire all of us.

As Busis describes it, “It’s a parade of infamy, the very definition of aging poorly  … ‘Brotherhood of Man’ is mesmerizing and cursed, a sunny slice of forced corporate frivolity that conceals remarkable darkness.”

And in conclusion, Happy Super Bowl, everyone! Embrace the cringe! Can’t wait to see what horrors NBC has in store for us this year!

Dear Mayim Bialik:

You do not have the Jeopardy! hosting job yet, and if you keep doing things like calling the first round of the game “Single Jeopardy,” you’re not going to get it.

Signed, Someone Who Doesn’t Have a Horse in This Race.

(I would usually suspect misogyny at the root of fan hate against a female host, but in this circumstance, I’ll allow it.)

Go ahead and call me a conspiracy theorist, but methinks there are some shenanigans going on over at Wheel of Fortune. It’s just a coincidence that this string of huge wins comes after Jeopardy! has a string of huge champions and has become something of a cultural touchstone? Come on.

John Oliver revealed how the whole Adam Driver thing came to be on Last Week Tonight. It was supposed to be a one-off joke, until it wasn’t.

Sam Waterson is hinting that a fan-favorite will be returning to Law & Order. But apparently, it won’t be S. Epatha Merkerson, so what are we even talking about here?

NBC hasn’t asked to interview Chinese tennis star Peng Shui, who is at the center of a sexual assault controversy involving a former Chinese government official. HUH. WHY NOT?

Seth Rogen is not wrong, but the thing is, we like having our opinions and preferences confirmed and maybe enjoy bitching when they’re not even more.

Issa Rae is going to be honored with the Producers Guild’s Visionary Award.

Meet the man who makes the fake penises for all your favorite shows and movies. WARNING and this might be obvious, but there are a bunch of NSFW images in there.

And while we’re on the topic of penises, Eminem will not pull his out during the Super Bowl Halftime show.

Where’s Neil Cavuto?

I’ve found it! The dumbest Buzzfeed headline! “Tell Us Your Coffee Order And We’ll Reveal Which ‘Yellowstone’ Character You Are

Congratulations to Anderson Cooper!

This isn’t a TV story, but here we go. So Billie Eilish recently stopped a concert when she noticed a fan in distress, telling the audience, “I wait for people to be OK before I keep going.” Some people, including Kanye West, took this to be an attack on Travis Scott following the Astroworld tragedy. West lashed out at Eilish on Instagram, demanding she apologize to Scott or he would pull out of Coachella which he is headlining with Eilish. Eilish has not apologized, replying instead, “Literally never said a thing about Travis. Was just helping a fan.” For his part, Scott liked Kanye’s post, and then unliked it after his lawyers saw what he did (but not before a bunch of other people noticed, too).

Anyway, between this and his behavior towards Kim Kardashian, her family and Pete Davidson, Kanye is out of control these days, and it feels like the prelude to something terrible happening. I certainly hope it’s not the case.

Renewals

In Development

Casting News

Mark Your Calendar

  • Winning Time: The Rise of the Lakers Dynasty will premiere on HBO on March 6.
  • The Tourist will debut on HBO Max on March 3.
  • Raven’s Home will return on Disney Channel on March 11.
  • Ali Wong: Don Wong will premiere on Netflix on February 14.
  • Cat Burglar will premiere on Netflix on February 22.
  • Young Justice: Phantoms will return on HBO Max this spring.
  • Mash-Up Our Home will premiere on HGTV on March 12.

R.I.P.

Destinee LaShaee, First transgender star of My 600-Lb. Life

Ian McDonald, Co-founder of King Crimson and Foreigner

WATCH THIS

FRIDAY

Inventing Anna: Based on a true story, Julia Garner stars as Anna Delvey, a con-artist who worked her way through New York’s elites. Series premiere. Netflix

Bigbug: Suburbanites are trapped in their homes by their robot servants in this dark sci-fi comedy from the director of Amélie, and Delicatessen. Netflix

everything’s gonna be all white: This three-part documentary series explores the history of race from the perspectives of people of color. Series premiere. 7 p.m., Showtime

Love is Blind: Open the pods. Season two. Netflix

Olympics: Snowboarding, Skeleton, Alpine Skiing, Speedskating & More 7 p.m., NBC

SATURDAY

Puppy Bowl marathon: Because puppies. 7 p.m., Animal Planet

Line Sisters: A sorority weekend turns deadly in this new Lifetime movie. 7 p.m., Lifetime

Olympics: Bobsled, Skeleton, Alpine Skiing, Figure Skating (Dance) & More 7 p.m., NBC

SUNDAY

Super Bowl: Happy Super Bowl to all who celebrate. 5 p.m., NBC

Bel-Air: The gritty reboot of the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air that feels like it has been 30 years in the making. Series premiere. Peacock

Puppy Bowl XVIII: MORE PUPPIES. 1 p.m., Animal Planet

Olympics: Figure Skating (Dance); Bobsled & More 9:30 p.m., NBC

 

FRI. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC Jeopardy! National College Championship
(new)
20/20
CBS Big Brother: Celebrity Edition
(new)
Blue Bloods
(repeat)
CW Penn & Teller: Fool Us
(repeat)
Whose Line Is It Anyway?
(repeat)
Whose Line Is It Anyway?
(repeat)
Local
FOX Friday Night Smackdown Local
NBC Olympics 2022 Primetime
(new)


SAT. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30 10:00 10:30 11:00 11:30
ABC NBA Basketball
(live)
News/Local
CBS Magnum P.I.
(repeat)
Blue Bloods
(repeat)
48 Hours News/Local
FOX 9-1-1
(repeat)
The Cleaning Lady
(repeat)
News/Local
NBC Olympics 2022 Primetime News/
Local
Olympics 2022 Primetime Plus


SUN. 6:00 6:30 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC America’s Funniest Home Videos
(repeat)
America’s Funniest Home Videos
(repeat)
Shark Tank
(repeat)
Shark Tank
(repeat)
CBS 60 Minutes Big Brother: Celebrity Edition
(new)
The Equalizer
(repeat)
SWAT
(repeat)
The CW Local March
(repeat)
Two Sentence Horror Stories
(repeat)
Two Sentence Horror Stories
(repeat)
Local
FOX The Simp-sons
(repeat)
Bob’s Burgers
(repeat)
The Simp-sons
(repeat)
The Great North
(repeat)
Bob’s Burgers
(repeat)
Family Guy
(repeat)
Local/News
NBC Super Bowl LVI
(live)
Olympics 2022 Primetime
(live)

 

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