Ignore our idiot Governor; it’s time to mask back up, Texas, because some people are too stupid to get vaccinated.

I don’t know why sea otters evolved to be so goddamned cute, but here we are.

Going Viral

One week ago:

And …. today:


This is what exponential growth looks like, kids. And just here in my neck of the woods, Texas, we’ve officially bypassed New York in deaths, and if the UT COVID-19 Modeling Project is correct, we’re about to see the worst month since the pandemic began.

If you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go scream into a mask.

But don’t worry: our governor has our health and safety at the forefront, by banning mask and vaccine mandates … even in schools, which are about to be filled with children who are ineligible for the vaccine and who are becoming sicker with the Delta variant. What could go wrong? (Put your masks back on, Texas.)

Governor Hutchinson of Arkansas, meanwhile, regrets outlawing mask mandates in his state and is asking the Legislature to repeal it for schools. It’s easy to dunk on the governor for outlawing masks in the first place, but I genuinely want to applaud him for admitting he made a mistake, which is usually something politicians are congenitally incapable of doing.

Fortunately, some are moving towards vaccine requirements, including Netflix, the Sundance Film Festival, the Emmys, Disney, Google, Microsoft, Tyson Foods, and the band Offspring.

Rhodes College is requiring students, faculty, and staff to be fully vaccinated or pay an additional $1500 for testing, which just makes good sense to me.

And New York City will require proof of vaccination for restaurants, indoor entertainment and performances and gyms. I’ll be going there soon, I’ll let you know how oppressed I was.

The FDA appears to be ready to give the Pfizer vaccine full approval by Labor Day, which is good news, as more companies and the Pentagon will be willing to impose vaccine mandates once that happens. I would like to see a federal requirement to be vaccinated to fly once the vaccine is fully approved. People won’t like it any more than they like having to wear a mask while flying, but I guarantee they’d do it.


Hey, remember how I was complaining last week about nursing home and hospital employees refusing to get vaccinated? THIS IS WHY.

Oh, and COVID-19 makes you stupider. (Explains a lot.)

Meanwhile, we probably have to admit that there are some people who we will never be able to reach, they’ve become so committed to the anti-vaxx lifestyle. In Missouri, some people are getting vaccinated in disguise, lest they be seen by their friends and family who might exclude them if they find out they’re vaccinated.

Lindsey Graham is positive despite being vaccinated (which he is glad he is); Jennifer Anniston is cutting the unvaxxed people out of her life; and Sharon Stone says that demanding her sets be vaccinated is costing her career.

The New York Times has postponed their return to the office. And Disney has reinstated their mask mandate in their parks, vaccinated or not.

The list of productions that have had to shut down continues to grow:

And The Masked Singer had twelve (12!) positive cases, but will not shut down production, which is … a choice.

Paramount is pulling the release of Clifford The Big Red Dog in theaters and looking for a new date.

Meanwhile, in positive news, Bridgerton and House Party have resumed production after shutting down.

Finally, here in Texas, State Senator Scott Apley passed away from COVID-19 at the age of just 45. Curiously, the Texas Republican Party declined to mention the cause of death in their press release or Tweet.

Can’t imagine why they’d be reluctant to mention anything about COVID …

All Other TV News

I can not tell you how many headlines I’ve seen today blaring that Chris Cuomo “ignored” the Andrew Cuomo story. And the thing is … of course he did? Isn’t that actually what he should do? He’s as conflicted as it gets, and potentially a witness, and he should not be using his platform to comment on the story in any fashion.

So obviously Meghan McCain is talking out of her ass, calling Chris Cuomo a “coward” for not discussing it. Look, I am not a fan of either Cuomo boy, but there is NO WAY IN HELL CNN’s lawyers would ever allow him to get near this story for very obvious reasons.

Congressman Devin Nunes is suing Rachel Maddow for hurting his fee-fees. Good luck with that, Devin! And moo!

Oh, Steve, no. Have you watched it? Because no.

If you don’t have an HBO Max subscription, you can stream these shows for free on Snapchat’s HBO Max Snap Mini: the series premieres of Batwoman, Euphoria, Game of Thrones, Harley Quinn, Lovecraft Country, Love Life, Perry Mason, Raised By Wolves, The Flight Attendant, Titans, Veneno, and Warrior, and the Season 2 premiere of Doom Patrol.

That dramatic reboot of Fresh Prince of Bel-Air is on its third round of showrunners.

People really like FBoys or islands or both.

The Good Fight made a joke about Selena Gomez’s kidney transplant — about how you’re not allowed to joke about it — and Gomez is not amused. (I kept seeing headlines about this, and my dumb brain translated “The Good Fight” to “The Good Place,” and I was so confused as to 1. why Gomez was only responding to it now, and 2. how on earth such a sweet show as The Good Place could have made a tacky joke about organ transplants.)

BuzzFeed asked folks who had been on game shows about their experiences. Check out the comments for our very own Whitney’s claim to fame involving Jeopardy! and Ken Jennings.

Darren Star and Deborah Copaken are in a fight over Emily in Paris.

FandangoNOW and Vudu are merging to become a singular streaming site.

Feel better soon, Kathy Griffin.


  • Tuca & Bertie has been renewed for a third season on Adult Swim.
  • Physical has been renewed for a second season on Apple TV+.

In Development

Casting News

Mark Your Calendars

  • Impeachment: American Crime Story will debut on FX on September 7.

  • Doogie Kameāloha, M.D. will premiere on Disney+ on September 8.

  • Cinderella will premiere on Amazon on September 3.

  • What We Do in the Shadows will return on FX on September 2.

  • Bitchin’: the Sound and Fury of Rick James will premiere on Showtime on September 3.

  • Kate will debut on Netflix on September 10.

  • Queen Sugar will return on OWN on September 7.

  • Vacation Friends will debut on Hulu on August 27. The video is, as you can see, restricted, but it’s for very mild language and drug use — it’s a comedy that stars Lil Rel, John Cena, Yvonne Orji and Meredith Hagner.

  • Prisoner of Love will debut on Discovery+ on August 30.

  • What Happens in Hollywood will debut on Roku Channel soon.

  • Joe Pera Talks with You returns on Adult Swim this fall.


Marcia Nasatir, Glass-breaking studio executive and producer


Cooking With Paris: Someone had the (genius?) idea to give Paris Hilton her own cooking show. Spoiler alert: she’s not a good cook. Premiere. Netflix

Cocaine Cowboys: The Kings of Miami: This docuseries follows true story of two childhood friends who became drug lords in Miami. Premiere. Netflix

Olympics: Women’s Beach Volleyball (semifinal); Track & Field (Day 7); Women’s Diving (platform semifinal) 7 p.m., NBC

Late Night:

  • Watch What Happens Live: Kristin Chenoweth, Crystal Kung Minkoff

WEDS. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC Press Your Luck
The $100,000 Pyramid
Match Game
CBS Big Brother
Love Island
CW World’s Funniest Animals: Summer Fling
Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Whose Line Is It Anyway?
FOX MasterChef
NBC Olympics

One thought on “Ignore our idiot Governor; it’s time to mask back up, Texas, because some people are too stupid to get vaccinated.

  1. My work was starting to push for everyone to come back in but my boss fully expects that to reverse itself very soon. I went to HEB yesterday and 80% of the customers had masks on even though it wasn’t required. So I still have some faith in humanity.

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