I don’t know why sea otters evolved to be so goddamned cute, but here we are.
I never thought a sea otter getting it's temperature checked would be this adorable.— Danny Deraney (@DannyDeraney) August 3, 2021
Credit Imgur/ User textradebran350 pic.twitter.com/DkFII30tY1
One week ago:
And …. today:
This is what exponential growth looks like, kids. And just here in my neck of the woods, Texas, we’ve officially bypassed New York in deaths, and if the UT COVID-19 Modeling Project is correct, we’re about to see the worst month since the pandemic began.
This month's Texas ICU numbers "will far surpass anything seen previously in the pandemic."— Mark Wiggins (@MarkWigginsTX) August 4, 2021
Latest @UTAustin COVID-19 Modeling Consortium via @HoustonChron: https://t.co/vQRy8C1pmL #txlege pic.twitter.com/XW0KHibouf
If you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go scream into a mask.
But don’t worry: our governor has our health and safety at the forefront, by banning mask and vaccine mandates … even in schools, which are about to be filled with children who are ineligible for the vaccine and who are becoming sicker with the Delta variant. What could go wrong? (Put your masks back on, Texas.)
Governor Hutchinson of Arkansas, meanwhile, regrets outlawing mask mandates in his state and is asking the Legislature to repeal it for schools. It’s easy to dunk on the governor for outlawing masks in the first place, but I genuinely want to applaud him for admitting he made a mistake, which is usually something politicians are congenitally incapable of doing.
Blue states remain significantly safer than red states. The worst seven states are all contiguous and represent a large fraction of the former confederacy. pic.twitter.com/YgumtEK0Lc— Mark Boslough (@MarkBoslough) July 29, 2021
Rhodes College is requiring students, faculty, and staff to be fully vaccinated or pay an additional $1500 for testing, which just makes good sense to me.
And New York City will require proof of vaccination for restaurants, indoor entertainment and performances and gyms. I’ll be going there soon, I’ll let you know how oppressed I was.
The FDA appears to be ready to give the Pfizer vaccine full approval by Labor Day, which is good news, as more companies and the Pentagon will be willing to impose vaccine mandates once that happens. I would like to see a federal requirement to be vaccinated to fly once the vaccine is fully approved. People won’t like it any more than they like having to wear a mask while flying, but I guarantee they’d do it.
Hey, remember how I was complaining last week about nursing home and hospital employees refusing to get vaccinated? THIS IS WHY.
Oh, and COVID-19 makes you stupider. (Explains a lot.)
Meanwhile, we probably have to admit that there are some people who we will never be able to reach, they’ve become so committed to the anti-vaxx lifestyle. In Missouri, some people are getting vaccinated in disguise, lest they be seen by their friends and family who might exclude them if they find out they’re vaccinated.
If COVID ever gets me, I want my obituary to read like this guy. pic.twitter.com/RFiHzZbckh— Doug Maesk (@DougMaesk) August 3, 2021
Lindsey Graham is positive despite being vaccinated (which he is glad he is); Jennifer Anniston is cutting the unvaxxed people out of her life; and Sharon Stone says that demanding her sets be vaccinated is costing her career.
The list of productions that have had to shut down continues to grow:
And The Masked Singer had twelve (12!) positive cases, but will not shut down production, which is … a choice.
Paramount is pulling the release of Clifford The Big Red Dog in theaters and looking for a new date.
Finally, here in Texas, State Senator Scott Apley passed away from COVID-19 at the age of just 45. Curiously, the Texas Republican Party declined to mention the cause of death in their press release or Tweet.
The Texas Republican Party is incredibly saddened to learn of the passing of State Republican Executive Committee (SREC) Member Scott Apley from Senate District 11. Please join us in praying for the Apley family. https://t.co/sTndQNqfQx #txlege— Texas GOP (@TexasGOP) August 4, 2021
Can’t imagine why they’d be reluctant to mention anything about COVID …
All Other TV News
I can not tell you how many headlines I’ve seen today blaring that Chris Cuomo “ignored” the Andrew Cuomo story. And the thing is … of course he did? Isn’t that actually what he should do? He’s as conflicted as it gets, and potentially a witness, and he should not be using his platform to comment on the story in any fashion.
So obviously Meghan McCain is talking out of her ass, calling Chris Cuomo a “coward” for not discussing it. Look, I am not a fan of either Cuomo boy, but there is NO WAY IN HELL CNN’s lawyers would ever allow him to get near this story for very obvious reasons.
Meghan McCain slams CNN's Chris Cuomo for not reporting on his brother Gov. Andrew Cuomo’s pattern of sexual harassment as “the worst kind of nepotism.” pic.twitter.com/BSqMC4kqtr— The Recount (@therecount) August 4, 2021
Congressman Devin Nunes is suing Rachel Maddow for hurting his fee-fees. Good luck with that, Devin! And moo!
If you don’t have an HBO Max subscription, you can stream these shows for free on Snapchat’s HBO Max Snap Mini: the series premieres of Batwoman, Euphoria, Game of Thrones, Harley Quinn, Lovecraft Country, Love Life, Perry Mason, Raised By Wolves, The Flight Attendant, Titans, Veneno, and Warrior, and the Season 2 premiere of Doom Patrol.
The Good Fight made a joke about Selena Gomez’s kidney transplant — about how you’re not allowed to joke about it — and Gomez is not amused. (I kept seeing headlines about this, and my dumb brain translated “The Good Fight” to “The Good Place,” and I was so confused as to 1. why Gomez was only responding to it now, and 2. how on earth such a sweet show as The Good Place could have made a tacky joke about organ transplants.)
BuzzFeed asked folks who had been on game shows about their experiences. Check out the comments for our very own Whitney’s claim to fame involving Jeopardy! and Ken Jennings.
FandangoNOW and Vudu are merging to become a singular streaming site.
Feel better soon, Kathy Griffin.
- Tuca & Bertie has been renewed for a third season on Adult Swim.
- Physical has been renewed for a second season on Apple TV+.
- Ex-Husbands, a comedy film by Billy Eichner and Paul Rudnick, has been bought by Amazon.
- Tell Me Lies, a drama starring Grace Van Patten, has been ordered straight-to-series at Hulu.
- Rockaway is being produced by and will star Kerry Washington at Netflix.
- Take the Ice, an ice-skating film produced by Brian Boitano, is in the works at Netflix.
- List of a Lifetime has been ordered at Lifetime.
- Purple Hearts, a romance film, has been ordered at Netflix.
- The Valdemar fantasy universe is being turned into a TV series.
- Taking Back the House; The Great Soul Food Cookoff; Burger Truck Brawl; Like Mother, Like Daughter?; and Breaking Black have been ordered at Discovery+.
- Iceland’s Mountain Factory is being adapted for TV.
- Ever After with Jaleel White will be turned into a TV pilot.
- Gordon Ramsay and Fox Entertainment are launching a new studio together, Studio Ramsay Global.
- Brendan Fraser has joined Killers of the Flower Moon on Apple TV+.
- Ashton Kutcher will co-star in Your Place or Mine on Netflix.
- Eiza Gonzalez is in talks to star in Three Body Problem on Netflix.
- Ron Cephas Jones and Vinnie Jones will appear on Law & Order: Organized Crime on NBC.
- Poppy Liu has joined the cast of Dead Ringers on Amazon.
- Dylan Minnette, Alan Ruck, Bashir Salahuddin and Mary Lynn Rajskub have joined the cast of The Dropout on Hulu.
- Christian Slater is your new Kylo Ren.
- Kerry Bishé has been added to the cast of Super Pumped on Showtime.
- Danny Glover and Richard Grieco have been added to the cast of the series Paper Empire.
- Julie Halston will reprise her Sex & the City role in … And Just Like That on HBO Max.
- Beth Lacke, Stephen Louis Grush, and Cass Buggé have joined Lightyears on Amazon.
- Bryan Brown and Greta Scacchi will star in Darby and Joan on Acorn.
Mark Your Calendars
- Impeachment: American Crime Story will debut on FX on September 7.
- Doogie Kameāloha, M.D. will premiere on Disney+ on September 8.
- Cinderella will premiere on Amazon on September 3.
- What We Do in the Shadows will return on FX on September 2.
- Bitchin’: the Sound and Fury of Rick James will premiere on Showtime on September 3.
- Kate will debut on Netflix on September 10.
- Queen Sugar will return on OWN on September 7.
- Vacation Friends will debut on Hulu on August 27. The video is, as you can see, restricted, but it’s for very mild language and drug use — it’s a comedy that stars Lil Rel, John Cena, Yvonne Orji and Meredith Hagner.
- Prisoner of Love will debut on Discovery+ on August 30.
- What Happens in Hollywood will debut on Roku Channel soon.
- Joe Pera Talks with You returns on Adult Swim this fall.
- The Great British Baking Show returns on Netflix this fall; Bake Squad will debut on August 11; Nailed It! will return on September 15; Baking Impossible will premiere on October 6; and School of Chocolate will debut this fall.
- Table Wars will premiere on HGTV in November.
- The Bradshaw Bunch returns on E! on October 6.
Marcia Nasatir, Glass-breaking studio executive and producer
Cooking With Paris: Someone had the (genius?) idea to give Paris Hilton her own cooking show. Spoiler alert: she’s not a good cook. Premiere. Netflix
Cocaine Cowboys: The Kings of Miami: This docuseries follows true story of two childhood friends who became drug lords in Miami. Premiere. Netflix
Olympics: Women’s Beach Volleyball (semifinal); Track & Field (Day 7); Women’s Diving (platform semifinal) 7 p.m., NBC
- Watch What Happens Live: Kristin Chenoweth, Crystal Kung Minkoff
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