In which Anderson Cooper learns people believe he’s a baby-eating robot.

It’s Monday, it’s February and we are almost one year into this Goddamned pandemic! Do we get some sort of surprise or a party when we get to March 11? Anyone?

Videos like this make me want a Husky, even though I know the fur situation would be a nightmare here in Houston.

All Other TV News

In an interview, a former Qanon believer apologized to Anderson Cooper for believing that he ate babies and was a robot. And I know there’s no point in trying to argue with insane logic, but … do robots run on baby blood?

I have so many questions.

Who will be the next Bachelorette? My money is on Abigail, making her the first hearing-impaired lead on one of these shows, but my heart is with Katie for being the only adult out there right now.

Here are the other actors who could be co-starring in Cobra Kai instead of Ralph Macchio, had things been a little different nearly 40 years ago. Not going to lie: I would very much like to watch a Karate Kid starring Robert Downey Jr.

God bless Jessica Simpson. (Or whoever runs Jessica Simpson’s Twitter account.)

Tomorrow is Groundhog Day: here are some Groundhog Day — or time-loop — movies you can watch to celebrate.

Homophobic Walking Dead fans are invited by the show to fuck right off:

LEGO and Jeopardy! fan makes a tribute to Alex Trebek in a kinetic sculpture:

Michael Paredes, the Wipeout contestant who died shortly after competing, died of coronary artery disease.

Apple is extending refunds to Apple TV+ subscribers through June.

Take care, Tony Bennett.

Going Viral 

Somewhere between 440,000 and 450,000 Americans have died of the virus. And in reality, the number is probably higher when you factor in the people who were never diagnosed. New cases are falling though —  by 40%! — which is excellent news, as long as we can get people vaccinated quickly.

The Biden Administration has increased the number of vaccines getting into arms: it’s at 1.3 million a day now, up from fewer than a million a day, and they are aiming for 1.5 million a day soon. Unfortunately, the mutations are catching up with us, so we need to be vaccinating even more than that to prevent them from becoming dominant. West Virginia and Alaska are leading the states in administering the vaccines to their residents.

Ten Republican senators are meeting with President Biden today to present their $600 billion alternative to his $1.9 trillion COVID package. One thing to note about it: you know how people were mad at Biden for his bill offering $1400 checks instead of $2000 checks? Yeah, the Republicans want to only offer $1000 checks, and to a lot fewer people. This bill is going nowhere.

This weekend, lunatic QAnoner and anti-vaxxers shut down Dodger Stadium’s vaccination program for an hour. It was only closed for an hour, but it’s still some incredibly dangerous bullshit and everyone involved should have been arrested. An interesting detail from the Los Angeles Times coverage:

A post on social media described the demonstration as the “Scamdemic Protest/March.” It advised participants to “please refrain from wearing Trump/MAGA attire as we want our statement to resonate with the sheeple. No flags but informational signs only.

“This is a sharing information protest and march against everything COVID, Vaccine, PCR Tests, Lockdowns, Masks, Fauci, Gates, Newsom, China, digital tracking, etc.

Governor Cuomo is under increased criticism after a report from the New York State Attorney General office came out last week revealing that there were nearly 4,000 more nursing home deaths in his state than previously reported. Cuomo is also being accused of not following his experts’ advice, and nine high-level health officials have resigned since this summer.

Have you ever wondered if holding your breath while passing someone else on the street will help prevent COVID-19? The answer is basically: it can’t hurt but wear a mask anyway.

Marc Wilmore, a TV writer, actor, and producer who worked on The Simpsons, In Living Color, F is for Family, The Tonight Show with Jay Leno and The PJs, and the younger brother of comedian and TV host Larry Wilmore, has died from COVID complications.

Olympic gold medalist gymnast Shawn Johnson, who is pregnant, tested positive for the virus.

Kelly Dodd of The Real Housewives of Orange County is a dangerous asshole who just lost one of her endorsements.

And O.J. Simpson got vaccinated. Terrific.

Stagecoach and Coachella have both been canceled for 2021. NOW WHERE ARE FORMER BACHELOR AND BACHELORETTE CONTESTANTS GOING TO HOOK UP???

Also tragically canceled: Logan Paul getting his ass kicked by Floyd Mayweather.

2020 is the first year since 2009 (which was the first year that FX started keeping track) that the number of original scripted TV series has declined. There were 7% fewer scripted series last year than in 2019. HUH. WHY?

Y’all, did you know what year The Last Man on Earth — the Will Forte comedy on Fox that was about survivors of a deadly virus — was set in? Can you guess? I’ll let you guess.

COVID-19 will be a part of the Sex and the City revival.

ABC continues to threaten us.

Keep all of the people who would ordinarily be hob-nobbing at parties and events during Super Bowl week in your thoughts and prayers.

Renewals

  • On My Block has been renewed for a fourth (and final) season on Netflix.

Cancellations

  • Trickster has been canceled on CBC and The CW after one season after it was revealed that the creator lied about her Indigenous heritage.
  • Raven’s Home has been canceled after four seasons on the Disney Channel.

In Development

  • A Wonder Years reboot has been given a pilot order at ABC.
  • The Untitled Regina Hicks Project, a sorority comedy, and Maggie, a comedy about a psychic have also been given pilot orders at ABC.
  • A Kate & Allie reboot has been given a put pilot order at NBC.
  • Queens, a hip-hop drama, and Epic, a romantic anthology series from Adam Horowitz and Edward Kitsis have been given pilot orders at ABC.
  • Sonic Prime, a Sonic the Hedgehog animated series, has been ordered at Netflix.
  • Bäckström, a six-part Swedish crime series, has been picked up at AMC.
  • Roger Black and Waco O’Guin have signed an overall deal with Netflix. Their next project is animated series Farzar.
  • Joe Giudice is trying to sell a reality show about his life in Italy. Lord.

Casting News

Mark Your Calendar

  • New Amsterdam will return on NBC on March 2.
  • Buried by the Bernards will premiere on Netflix on February 12.
  • Tooned In will debut on Nickelodeon on February 8.
  • Tom & Jerry will debut on HBO Max on February 26.

R.I.P.

Jamie Tarses, The first female president of an entertainment division at a network. At 32, she was also the youngest person to ever take the job when ABC named her, She was also a producer and an executive at NBC.

Allan Burns, Co-creator of The Munsters and The Mary Tyler Moore Show, and animator on Rocky & Bullwinkle, Dudley Do-Right, and George of the Jungle

Mitchell Krauss, CBS correspondent who was injured in the assassination of Egyptian President Anwar Sadat

Sophie Xeon, Grammy-nominated pop artist and producer

Duke Bootee, Pioneering songwriter who wrote “The Message” for Grandmaster Flash and the Furious Five, one of the first rap songs to break through

Hilton Stewart Paterson Valentine, Founding member of the U.K. R&B band The Animals

WATCH THIS

The Investigation: Variety is calling this limited series that explores the bizarre murder of Swedish journalist Kim Wall “2021’s first great drama.” For those of you not obsessed with true crime, she was the woman who was killed on a homemade submarine in Copenhagen back in 2017. 9 p.m., NBC

The Bachelor: The bullies finally get what’s coming to them. 7 p.m., ABC

Plan 9 From Outer Space: Generally considered the worst movie ever made, there’s something poetic about it being aired on a network dedicated to “classic” movies. 7 p.m., TCM

Late Night:

  • Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon: Bryan Cranston, John Cena, Remi Wolf
  • Late Night with Seth Meyers: Post Malone, Mary Steenburgen, Matt Cameron
  • The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: Ethan Hawke, Mickey Guyton
  • The Late Late Show with James Corden: Viggo Mortensen, Quinn XCII featuring Chelsea Cutler
  • Jimmy Kimmel Live: Robin Wright, Chris Bianco, Bahamas featuring the Teskey Brothers
  • The Daily Show: The Daily Social Distancing Show
  • Conan: Jay Baruchel
  • Watch What Happens Live: Michelle Collins, Jerry O’Connell
  • A Little Late with Lily Singh: Russ

MON. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC The Bachelor
(new)
The Good Doctor
(repeat)
CBS The Neighborhood
(repeat)
Bob ♥ Abishola
(repeat)
All Rise
(repeat)
Bull
(repeat)
CW All American
(new)
All American Stories
(new)
Local
FOX 9-1-1
(new)
9-1-1: Lone Star
(new)
News/Local
NBC Ellen’s Game of Games
(new)
The Wall
(new)
Weakest Link
(new)

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