It’s a wrap.

by Therese Odell, posted in Uncategorized

Hi! It’s the Tuesday before Thanksgiving.

Political Crap

All I want is to not think or write about politics for a week — just a week! — but because President Squatter can’t just be a normal person and admit what everyone else already knows, things keep happening and we keep having to talk about them.

Since I last left FoolishWatcher’s HQ, a bunch of stuff — mostly positive — has happened:

First of all, let’s begin with this absolute gem:

Trump is sweating over his campaign lawyers’ dismal and often outlandish efforts to reverse President-elect Joe Biden’s projected electoral victory. Trump is worried that his campaign’s legal team, which is being led by his personal lawyer Rudy Giuliani, is composed of “fools that are making him look bad,” NBC News reported Monday.

On Sunday, one of the team’s members, conspiracy theorist Sidney Powell, was effectively fired after suggesting—again without any proof—that the Republican governor and secretary of state of Georgia were part of a plot to rig the election for Biden.

For now, Giuliani has kept his job as the president’s point man on the election challenge, even after a week in which he gave a widely derided argument in Pennsylvania federal court, only to see a judge on Saturday issue a scathing dismissal of the campaign’s vote challenge lawsuit. Giuliani, who was once a top federal prosecutor in Manhattan, also presided over the press conference at RNC headquarters, where he stood and watched Powell promote the campaign’s most far-fetched vote fraud allegations to date. At that event, Giuliani perspired so heavily that sweat apparently blackened from hair dye conspicuously ran down his cheeks as he made baseless allegations of electoral skullduggery. Trump, who is obsessed with television and the personal appearances of people on it, was not happy with Giuliani’s look at the press conference, a person familiar with the president’s reaction told NBC News.

GIVE ME MORE OF THIS. I DEMAND MORE.

In actual consequential news, Michigan, despite being completely ridiculous drama queens and causing not a small amount of anxiety among observers, certified their vote and officially declared Biden the winner of their state.

This seems to have triggered the head of the GSA, Emily Murphy, to finally begin the transition process after weeks of people screaming at her to do so. Murphy, obviously a President Obstructionist appointee, did so in the most pathetic, self-pitying way possible, whinging in her formal letter about her pets being threatened.

She also fails to call Joe Biden “President-elect” or say that she has ascertained that he won the election.

You should also note that Murphy claims she has and is acting independently, and was not directed by the Executive Branch to withhold the letter or to write it now. This is mostly interesting because about an hour after it was made public, President Can’t Keep His Story Straight tweeted the following:

Lol.

When people like New York Times reporter Maggie Haberman noted that the tweet above is as close to a concession as we’re going to get from the Asshole-in-Chief, he tweeted this right on cue:

I’ll give you one guess as to which of these tweets was written by a staffer and which was written by President Dominion.

Right, so. We all went to bed last night a little more confident that democracy was going to be there in the morning …

… Only to wake up to discover the President of the United States had gone FULL RANDY QUAID.

He retweeted this:

And then began having a conversation with Randy:

And then retweeted this lunacy:

Just a real quick reminder: Randy Quaid had some sort of weird mental breakdown back in 2010, when he and his wife went on a mini crime spree, fled to Canada and sought asylum there, claiming a shady cabal of “Hollywood Star Whackers” were chasing them and had poisoned Jeremy Piven. They also made a bunch of sex tapes in which his wife would wear a mask of Rupert Murdoch while their dog barked at them — videos that he posted on YouTube. You know, the kind of guy the President of the United States would want to have his back.

But not even Randy Quaid’s terrifying rantings could stop two more significant certifications from going forward today: Pennsylvania and Nevada both finalized their results, and guess what? President Loser lost again.

As for President-elect Joe Biden, he and his team continue moving forward, meeting with Department of Defense and other officials. He’s expected to appoint Janet Yellen as Treasury Secretary, the first woman in the role, and despite the fact that she’s only five feet tall.

Oh, and the Dow hit 30,000 for the first time today, presumably on the news that the GSA has OK’d the transition and President Volatility will be leaving soon. You can just guess who is taking credit for it, however.

No matter, it’s all noise. President Turkey will be out in 57 days. Meanwhile, President-elect Joe Biden will sit down tonight with Lester Holt for his first interview since the election.

Going Viral

According to John Hopkins, we’re up to 258,172 American deaths, according to Worldometer, it’s 264,179. In any event, somewhere around 24,000 Americans have died of COVID since the election. That’s fucking grim and it’s not getting better. Stay safe this week.

Here’s how the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade is going to be handled: no marching bands, 130 balloon handlers instead of 2,000, socially-distanced Broadway performances, and it will only be a block long.

Fox & Friends First host Todd Piro is quarantining after testing positive.

A bunch of Baltimore Ravens has apparently tested positive.

But good news: Santa is immune according to Dr. Fauci.

Things are looking not great for movie theaters, what with 600 closing recently, and no box office to speak of, but this guy seems optimistic anyway. OK! Sure!

An Australian airline is planning on making proof of vaccination compulsory for flying. I suspect this will become more common — and I also suspect people will freak the fuck out about it.

All Other TV News

When Jeopardy! returns to production next week, it will be hosted with a number of different guest hosts. Ken Jennings will, appropriately enough, be the first. (I also suspect that this will serve as an informal audition process for the job, too.)

Princess Diana’s brother wants Americans to know that he thinks The Crown is some bullshit. 

Attention Supernatural fans with a fixation on footwear.

You can binge Industry on HBO Max beginning on Friday, and Between the World and Me for free tomorrow. 

AMC+ is now available on Roku.

Netflix is expanding its studio in Albuquerque and will be filming Stranger Things there beginning next month.

Pete Davidson, of all people, is going to be your new George Bailey.

Nick Offerman is good people.

Imma need you people to stop talking about Hannibal season four until there is a Hannibal season four, thanks.

Renewals

In Development

  • Fire Season, a wildfire drama, is being developed at TNT.
  • New Money, a comedy written by Jemele Hill and produced by Gabrielle Union, is being developed at Showtime.
  • The Ogun, an action film starring and produced by Anthony Mackie, is being made at Netflix.
  • Action sci-fi movie Boss Level has been bought by Hulu.
  • Aaliyah Williams has signed a first-look deal with CBS Studios.
  • Dee Harris-Lawrence has signed an overall deal with Warner Bros. Television.

Casting News

Mark Your Calendars

  • folklore: the long pond studio sessions will debut on Disney+ on November 25. 

  • The Walking Dead returns on AMC on February 28.

  • Heaven’s Gate: The Cult of Cults will stream on HBO Max beginning December 3.

  • The Art of Political Murder will debut on HBO on December 16.

  • Deliciousness will premiere on MTV on December 14.

  • Transformers: War for Cybertron – Earthrise will premiere on Netflix on December 30.

  • A Suitable Boy will premiere on Acorn on December 7.

R.I.P.

David Denkins, New York City’s first — and only — Black mayor

Dena Dietrich, Character actress who appeared in countless TV shows and movies including All My Children, Murphy Brown, Santa Barbara, It’s the Gary Shandling Show, The Ropers, and The Mod Squad among many others

Sandy Dvore, Graphic designer who created the opening credits for The Young and the Restless, The Partridge Family, and The Waltons

Patt Quinn, One of the co-founders of the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge

WATCH THIS

Hillbilly Elegy: Amy Adams and Glen Close star in Ron Howard’s adaptation of the best-selling memoir of the same name. But note: the reviews of this have been spectacularly bad, some calling it Howard’s worst movie ever. Netflix

Happiest Season: Kristen Stewart stars in this holiday movie about a woman whose plans to propose to her girlfriend go awry when she realizes her girlfriend has not yet come out to her conservative family. Also in the cast: Alison Brie, Dan Levy, Victor Garber, Mary Steenburgen, Aubrey Plaza, and Ana Gasteyer. Hulu

Porno: And if wholesome holiday fun isn’t your thing, in this campy horror-comedy, a group of movie theater employees watch an old porno film and inadvertently release a sex demon.  Shudder

Late Night:

  • Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon: Joe Scarborough, Mika Brzezinski, Paul Bettany, Internet Money featuring Gunna, Don Toliver and Nav
  • Late Night with Seth Meyers: Amy Adams, Adam Davidson
  • The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: Barack Obama
  • The Late Late Show with James Corden: Goldie Hawn, Kurt Russell
  • Jimmy Kimmel Live: Kristen Stewart, Josh Duhamel, James Taylor
  • The Daily Show: The Daily Social Distancing Show

TUES. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC The Bachelorette
(new)		 Big Sky
(new)
CBS NCIS
(new)		 FBI
(new)		 FBI: Most Wanted
(new)
CW Gilmore Girls: A Year in the Life Local
FOX Cosmos: Possible Worlds
(new)		 neXt
(new)		 News/Local
NBC The Voice
(new)		 Weakest Link
(repeat)		 Transplant
(new)

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