I built a gallery of the 100+ shows that ended or will end this year. We lost so many great shows: Veep, You’re the Worst, Jane the Virgin, Crazy Ex-Girlfriend … BYE, GUYS. Y’ALL WERE REALLY GREAT AND I MISS YOU ALREADY. I’m not sure what else to say about the gallery except that the only comment on the piece chides me for using the word “beloved.” Reader, I did not use the word “beloved” in either the article or in any of my 108 slides. I am pretty sure I’m being gaslit.
Threat Level Midnight is here in its entire 25-minute glory!
After secret agent Michael Scarn (played by Scott) is forced into retirement due to the death of his wife Catherine Zeta-Scarn, the President of the United States of America (played by Darryl Philbin) requests that he prevent Goldenface (played by Jim Halpert) from blowing up the NHL All-Star Game and killing several hostages. Scarn goes undercover and learns how to play hockey, killing another hockey player (played by Oscar Martinez) to make it into the game, but after confronting Goldenface, he is shot. He later recuperates but learns that the President was in on it all along. Depressed, he goes to a bar to drown his sorrows. The patrons of the bar sing a song called “The Scarn” which he danced to with his wife, which cheers Scarn up immensely. With his courage restored, Scarn is able to save the day and blow up Goldenface in the process.
TV Guide argues that FX and FXX were the best networks of the decade. I’m not entirely certain hat I agree — I think HBO might have something to say about that — but I will agree that in terms of the ratio of high quality shows to duds on FX is remarkably high.
I almost feel sorry for Jar-Jar. I SAID ALMOST.
Steve Brusk, CNN’s Politics Producer, has resigned after the Project Veritas secret video came out accusing him of misconduct.
Samantha Bee has set up a wedding registry for Stephen Miller and Katie Waldman to raise money for refugees. I love this bad bitch.
This Martin Scorsese/Marvel story will never die. LET IT GO. HE DOESN’T LIKE SUPERHERO MOVIES. SO WHAT?
David Benioff and D.B. Weiss are making a film out of the graphic novel Lovecraft. However, people are already pointing out that the subject of the film, H.P. Lovecraft, was a racist and anti-Semite and that maybe the guys who thought Confederate would be a good idea aren’t the best choice for this project.
Oh, lord. 2020 is going to be the longest century of our lives.
Impeachment Corner!
The Corner is small today, but it’s worth pausing to note that this morning, the House Judiciary Committee voted to approve the articles of impeachment against President Dumb Baby for only the third time in U.S. history. The articles will now go to the full House for a vote, probably sometime next week, possibly Wednesday.
There’s not a lot to say about the markup process — it ended up just being a tedious day and a half-long debate in which the Democrats hammered on the facts of the case and the Republicans whined about Hunter Biden. But! Somewhat hilariously, after nearly 15 hours of this nonsense, last night Committee Chairman Nadler announced that they would take the vote in the morning instead of that night. Ranking Member Doug Collins was SO MAD Y’ALL! calling it a “bush league stunt” and “crap.” Which … what?
See, what had happened was, the Republicans deliberately dragged out the markup process all day and all night with repetitive nonsense for the sole purpose of delaying the vote on the articles until sometime after midnight just so they could claim that the vote was taken “in the dead of night” because the Democrats were so ashamed of themselves that they didn’t want the American people to see it took place. But then Chairman Nadler was like, “NOPE! We will do it in broad daylight, motherfuckers. See you tomorrow.”
Love it.
Now brace yourself: next week is going to be SOMETHING.
Former Republican House Members know the oaths they took.
Why don’t today’s Republicans? #DefendOurDemocracy pic.twitter.com/6VVnk8VYe9
— Nancy Pelosi (@SpeakerPelosi) December 13, 2019
Renewals
- The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel has been renewed for a fourth season on Amazon.
- Little America has been renewed at Apple TV+ ahead of its premiere.
- Tamron Hall has been renewed for a second season.
- Flip or Flop has been renewed at HGTV.
Cancellations
- Brockmire is ending after season four.
In Development
- The Andy Cohen Diaries is being turned into an animated series at Quibi.
- Welcome to Chechnya has been bought by HBO.
- Trust Exercise is being developed into a TV series.
- Game Changer is being developed into a TV series at Netflix.
- Life of Polly is being developed into a TV series at Amazon.
- Orlando Bloom has signed a first-look deal at Amazon.
- Nisha Ganatra has signed a deal with ABC Studios.
Casting News
- Andre Braugher, Viola Davis, Jay Pharoah, Asante Blackk, Corinne Foxx, Tiffany Haddish, and Jharrel Jerome will star in Live in Front of a Studio Audience: Good Times.
- Margo Martindale will recur on Your Honor on Showtime.
- Andy Cohen will join Anderson Cooper for CNN’s New Year’s Eve coverage.
- Natalie Martinez is joining The Stand on CBS All Access.
- Karen Fukuhara, Deon Cole, Coy Stewart, Sydney Mikayla, and Dee Bradley Baker will provide the main voices for Kipo and the Age of Wonderbeasts for Netflix. Sterling K. Brown, Dan Stevens, Lea Delaria, Joan Jett, John Hodgman, GZA and more will guest star.
- Manuel Garcia-Rulfo, Raza Jaffrey, Adria Arjona, Justin Bartha, Lex Scott Davis, Michael Raymond-James, Dominic Fumusa, Brian Howe, Nelson Franklin, and Reggie Lee have been cast in the Netflix film Sweet Girl.
- Will Poulter is dropping out of the Lord of the Rings series on Amazon.
- Sean Kleier is joining 9-1-1 on Fox.
- Jason Diaz is joining The 100 on The CW.
Mark Your Calendar
- Dracula will debut on Netflix on January 4.
- The Age of A.I. will debut on YouTube on December 18.
- Top Chef returns on Bravo on March 19.
- Briarpatch will debut and The Sinner will return on USA on February 6.
- The Outsider will debut on HBO on January 12.
- Brockmire will return on IFC in March.
- Undercover Boss will return on CBS on January 8.
- Pavarotti will debut on Showtime on December 30.
- Interrogation will debut on CBS All Access on February 6.
- Ted Bundy: Falling for a Killer will debut on Amazon on January 31.
- Murdoch Mysteries will return on Ovation on February 1.
- Hopelessly In Love will debut on January 4 on Lifetime.
- Zombies 2 premieres on Disney Channel on February 14.
- Nick Cannon Presents: Wild ‘N Out on MTV on January 7.
- Wrong Man will debut on Starz on February 9.
- NBC will host a Democratic Presidential debate on February 19.
R.I.P.
Danny Aiello, Legendary actor
Chris Cotton, Comedian and co-host of Every Damn Day on Comedy Central online.
WATCH THIS
FRIDAY
6 Underground: Ryan Reynolds and Dave Franco star as members of a team of international operatives brought together to take down a dictator. Also, car chases! Netflix
Marvel’s Runaways: Third and final season. Hulu
The Grand Tour: Seamen: Like the Grand Tour but with boats. Amazon
The Expanse: The entire fourth season. Amazon
Mel Brooks Unwrapped: A celebration of American treasure, Mel Brooks. 8 p.m., HBO
The 88th Annual Hollywood Christmas Parade: Christmas but a parade. 7 p.m., The CW
American Housewife: A family heirloom is broken in the fall finale. 7 p.m., ABC
Fresh Off the Boat: Louis threatens to ruin Christmas by trying to help. Fall finale. 7:30 p.m., ABC
The Blacklist: Red and the Task Force visit a former blacklister in the fall finale. 7 p.m., NBC
Hawaii Five-0: A tourist helicopter is shot down in the fall finale. 7 p.m., CBS
Magnum P.I.: Magnum is set up. Fall finale. 8 p.m., CBS
SATURDAY
Saturday Night Live: Scarlett Johansson & Niall Horan 10:30 p.m., NBC
Hellboy: David Harbor takes over the horns. 10 p.m., HBO
SUNDAY
Watchmen: Everything ends? for real this time.” That’s all I know. Goodbye awesome show, you were awesome. Series finale. 8 p.m., HBO
The 42nd Annual Kennedy Center Honors: Earth, Wind & Fire, Sally Field, Linda Ronstadt, Sesame Street, and Michael Tilson Thomas are celebrated. 7 p.m., CBS
The Simpsons: Sideshow Bob is Santa. Fall finale. 7 p.m., Fox
Bless the Harts: Betty tries to give the family Christmas on a budget. Fall finale. 7:30 p.m., Fox
Bob’s Burgers: Linda saves Christmas in the fall finale. 8 p.m., Fox
Family Guy: Stewie is scarred by his trip to visit Santa. Fall finale. 8:30 p.m., Fox
Rick & Morty: Fourth season finale. 10:30 p.m., Cartoon Network
Late Night:
- The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: (Friday): Mark Harmon
- Watch What Happens Live (Sunday): Kate Chastain, Rhylee Gerber
FRI. | 7:00 | 7:30 | 8:00 | 8:30 | 9:00 | 9:30 |
ABC | American Housewife (repeat) |
Fresh Off the Boat (repeat) |
20/20 (new) |
CBS | Hawaii Five-0 (new) |
Magnum P.I. (new) |
Blue Bloods (repeat) |
CW | The 88th Annual Hollywood Christmas Parade (new) |
Local |
FOX | Friday Night Smackdown (new) |
Local |
NBC | The Blacklist (new) |
Dateline (new) |
—
SAT. | 7:00 | 7:30 | 8:00 | 8:30 | 9:00 | 9:30 | 10:00 | 10:30 | 11:00 | 11:30 |
ABC | The Little Mermaid Live! (not live) |
20/20 | News/Local |
CBS | Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer | Frosty the Snow-man | Frosty Returns | 48 Hours | News/Local |
FOX | The Masked Singer (repeat) |
News/Local |
NBC | How to Train Your Dragon: Home-coming | Dream-works Trolls Holiday | Dateline | Saturday Night Live | News/
Local |
Saturday Night Live (Scarlett Johannson & Niall Horan) |
—
SUN. | 6:00 | 6:30 | 7:00 | 7:30 | 8:00 | 8:30 | 9:00 | 9:30 |
ABC | The Sound of Music |
CBS | 60 Minutes (new) |
The 42nd Annual Kennedy Center Honors (new) |
NCIS: Los Angeles (repeat) |
The CW | Local | The Christmas Caroler Challenge (new) |
The Christmas Caroler Challenge (new) |
Local |
FOX | The OT (live) |
The Simpsons (new) |
Bless the Harts (new) |
Bob’s Burgers (new) |
Family Guy (new) |
Local/News |
NBC | Sunday Night Football (live) |