A couple of years ago, I built a gallery for Chron.com of the “50 Greatest TV Shows of the Century … So Far.” It got me in trouble with a pair of local radio DJs who, not realizing I had organized the shows chronologically and thinking that it was organized in a list of best to worst (or worst to best — I honestly don’t know how they were reading it), said I was stupid and shouldn’t reproduce.
Well, the list is back, and I’ve updated it, swapping out five shows. I’ve also reorganized the list so that it is alphabetical in an attempt to keep people from casting aspersions on my offspring real and imaginary.
For you, my loyal Foolish readers, the shows I removed are: Louie; The Amy Schumer Show; The Returned; Glee; and Rubicon. Although I am not convinced I won’t put Rubicon and The Returned back in there one day. If I ever build a gallery of the best shows that only aired for one season, Rubicon will lead the list. As for the shows that I added, that’s for you to figure out.
Here are the shows that disappointed critics the most. I disagree with Westworld — I actually thought it was much better this year than its first season — but I also get where folks are coming from.
UNLESS YOU’RE GOING TO MAKE IT HAPPEN, STOP TALKING ABOUT A PARKS AND RECREATION REUNION. DAMMIT.
The journal Injury Epidemiology did a Very Important Study about Game of Thrones where they proved a number of important points: backstabbing highborn women have the highest survival rates (for now), and your chances of dying within the first hour of appearing in the series are fairly high.
Speaking of Netflix, this will not surprise anyone with teenagers in their house, but the streamer is basically entirely supported by teenagers. What is curious is that despite earlier reports that Daredevil was the fourth-most-popular show on Netflix, it doesn’t appear on this list.
Ellen Pompeo is mad at The Today Show (and probably folks like me) for focusing on the wrong things from her interview with Jada Pinkett Smith. What can we say? We love the box wine.
People are still mad at Adam Levine for how he handled that whole Voice debacle.
RuPaul’s Drag Race All Stars is coming back on Friday, but here are the first fourteen minutes, if you can’t wait.
Bristol Palin bitching about her portrayal on Teen Mom OG is about the funniest thing that you’ll read today. Oh, did the show that made Farrah Abraham a star not focus enough on your faith, honey? WHO COULD HAVE PREDICTED THAT? Also, you’re 27. Why are you on a show called “Teen Mom” in the first fucking place?
A Few Political Notes
I’m sure by now you’ve seen the hilarious and embarrassing spectacle of Trump, Pence, Pelosi and Schumer meeting to talk about avoiding a government shutdown:
Trump: “I am proud to shut down the government for border security, Chuck… I will be the one to shut it down, I’m not going to blame you for it.” LOLOLOLOLOLOL
Folks are comparing it to the Real Housewives of Wherever, but I’m here to say as someone who is a minor expert on those shows, those ladies are much more mature and restrained than President Government Shutdown was yesterday.
Meanwhile, Piers Morgan would like to be Trump’s Chief of Staff. Look, Trump brought Omarosa into the White House, so don’t think this is impossible.
Sarah Sanders says she hopes her legacy will be that she has tried to be “transparent and honest” every day. Oh … Sarah. Bless your heart.
Finally, President Instigator suggested that people would “revolt” if he were impeached. I don’t know if he means that literally or figuratively, but I think the word he meant here was “celebrate” and “pop champagne” and “party in the streets.”
Sex Monster News
Megan Fox said that she hasn’t come forward with her own #MeToo stories because she worried people would basically say she deserved whatever she got because of the way her career played to the male gaze: essentially that she is an imperfect victim. And she’s not wrong! And she doesn’t deserve that!
And I had completely forgotten about the horrible things Michael Bay made her do (for instance, to audition for Transformers, he made her wash his Ferrari; and when she was 15-years-old, he put her in a bikini and six-inch heels and made to dance under a waterfall in Bad Boys) and his shitty response: “I know that’s just Megan. Megan loves to get a response. And she does it in kind of the wrong way. I’m sorry, Megan. I’m sorry I made you work 12 hours. I’m sorry that I’m making you show up on time. Movies are not always warm and fuzzy.”
But this is the first I heard about the Bay crew writing an open letter to her that was posted on Bay’s website that read, in part: “When facing the press, Megan is the queen of talking trailer trash and posing like a porn star. And yes we’ve had the unbearable time of watching her try to act on set, and yes, it’s very cringe-able. So maybe, being a porn star in the future might be a good career option. But make-up beware, she has a paragraph tattooed to her backside (probably due to her rotten childhood) — easily another 45 minutes in the chair!” WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK. So, yeah, I don’t really blame her for not coming forward because look what happened the last time she did.
- Goliath has been renewed for a third season at Amazon. See below for casting.
- Get Shorty has been renewed for season three at Epix.
- Detroiters has been cancelled at Comedy Central, but is being shopped around to other networks.
- Selena: The Series has been greenlit at Netflix.
- Bless This Mess, a comedy starring Dax Shepard and Lake Bell, has been picked up to series at ABC.
- Blacksmith, a drama based on the graphic novel of the same name, is being developed at NBC.
- Wait Wait … Don’t Tell Me! is being turned into a TV series.
- A Tabloid Empire, a documentary about Murdoch’s media empire, is coming to BBC.
- Conversations with a Killer: The Ted Bundy Tapes is in development at Netflix.
- Butterfly, a drama about a transgender child, is coming to Hulu.
- Sugar and Toys, an animated series from the Boondocks guys, is in development at Fuse.
- The New York Undercover reboot has moved a step closer to happening at ABC.
- Dennis Quaid, Amy Brenneman, Beau Bridges, Griffin Dunne, Sherilyn Fenn, and Shamier Anderson will appear in Goliath.
- Finn Wittrock and Jon Jon Briones are joining Ratched on Netflix.
- Brenda Song, Mike Vogel, and Dennis Haysbert will star in Secret Obsession on Netflix.
- Fred Arisen, Ana Gasteyer, Janeane Garafalo and Darrell Hammond, Rose Byrne, Matthew Broderick, Justin Theroux, Susan Sarandon, Gillian Jacobs, Juliette Lewis, Ellie Kemper, Michael Shannon, Martha Plimpton, Jessica Walter and Campbell Scott, Billy Crudup, Bridget Everett, Difficult People‘s Julie Klausner, Broad City‘s Paul W. Downs, Richard Kind, Thomas Lennon, David Krumholtz, John Early from Search Party, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt‘s Ellie Kemper and James Monroe Iglehart, and Jackie Hoffman are all going to appear on At Home with Amy Sedaris (see below for premiere date).
Mark Your Calendars
- True Detective will return on HBO on January 13.
- Future Man returns on Hulu on January 11.
- Struggle: The Life and Lost Art of Szukalski will premiere on Netflix on December 21.
- At Home with Amy Sedaris will return on truTV on February 19.
- Demon House will premiere on Travel Channel on January 1. A Ghost Hunters marathon beginning on December 31 will lead up to it.
- Amazing Adventures airs on Discovery tonight.
- Shrill will debut on Hulu on March 15.
- Aggretsuko: We Wish You a Metal Christmas is coming to Netflix on December 20.
- Gold Rush: White Water will premiere on January 4 on Discovery Channel.
- My Big Fat Fabulous Life returns on TLC on January 1.
- Bird vs. Plane: Miracle on the Hudson will premiere on Smithsonian on January 15.
- Transformers: Rescue Bots Academy will premiere on Discovery Family on January 5.
- “Crisis of Infinite Earths” will be your next DC Crossover special:
Rob DesHotel, Writer and Producer on Man with a Plan and previously That 70s Show
Bill Siegel, Documentary filmmaker
The Real Housewives of Dallas: Second part of the reunion. 9 p.m., Bravo
The Real Housewives of New Jersey: Teresa and Joe fight a legal battle to keep their family together here. I dunno, Italy sounds nice. 8 p.m., Bravo
Champaign Ill: When a rapper unexpectedly dies, his crew has to move back home in this new comedy. YouTube
Ellen’s Game of Games: A holiday edition of the perky game show. 7 p.m., NBC
Out of One, Many: A documentary about a diverse group of immigrants as they prepare to take their citizenship test. Netflix
Late Night: Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon: Natalie Portman, Dennis Miller, Braison Cyrus Late Night with Seth Meyers: Lenny Kravitz, Anthony Atamanuik, Ina Garten, Todd Sucherman The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: Leslie Mann, Brandon Micheal Hall, Lil Wayne The Late Late Show with James Corden: Gisele Bundchen Jimmy Kimmel Live: Will Ferrell, John C. Reilly, Matty Matheson, Rita Wilson The Daily Show: Jennifer Lopez Watch What Happens Live: Lenny Kravitz
|A Million Little Things
|NBC||Ellen’s Game of Games
|Little Big Shots
|A Legendary Christmas