I built you a fall TV gallery, and what thanks will I get? Oh, that’s right, my fall will be ruined.

Two points of business:

  1. Next week is the beginning of the fall TV season for the networks. I’ve built a gallery and schedule over on Chron.com if you are interested.
  2. My fall hate blog poll will close Sunday night — and someone has recently decided that medical drama New Amsterdam should be my personal hell, moving it from the bottom of the list to the top. Vote often, kids:

A confession: I have not seen the Mr. Rogers documentary, Won’t You Be My Neighbor, in part because I didn’t want to embarrass myself by sobbing for two straight hours in public, in part because I honestly don’t know that my heart can take it. Exhibit A: Google’s doodle today is a stop-motion animation celebration for Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood‘s 51st anniversary, and the tears were just uncontrollably POURING out of my faceholes while watching it. I’m not ready.

Trent Reznor is doing the music for Watchmen. Awesome.

Mother of Dragons 4EVA:

And here’s a bunch of crap you can buy to fill the time between now and the premiere of Game of Thrones.

Someone did a study to find out how often It’s Always Sunny references drugs and alcohol. I mean, did they see this week’s episode?

If you are a fan of NBC’s Chicago series, here’s what to expect from the crossover.

Here’s the banjo cover of the Knight Rider theme song you were looking for:

Mark Steins has filed the inevitable lawsuit against Hallmark for unceremoniously firing him. I still wonder what the hell happened here.

Everything we know so far about the Downton Abbey movie. (Not all that much, quite honestly.)

Of course Alec Baldwin is returning as Trump, did anyone think he wasn’t?

James Marsters is excited about the Buffy reboot, and why not?

Might Love, American Style be the next Netflix reboot? Does anyone who reads this even have any idea what Love, American Style was? (Or, for bonus points, which more popular shows were spun off from it?)

This is a lovely collection of classic sitcom reads.

The witch from Real Housewives of Beverly Hills has now divorced her husband she never seemed particularly fond of.

Ooh, might the Oscars be streamed sometime in the future?

If you are at all interested in the business side of things, this article about the disruption that is taking place in the broadcast networks is interesting.

Time’s Up

This happened. And y’all wonder why we’re pissed. Yandy took down the costume when some people suggested it wasn’t the best idea.

Jane Fonda is not interested in men returning to the public sphere before they have done the work. At an event in New York City for her upcoming HBO documentary:

“Guys are trying to make a comeback and they haven’t done the work,” she said, citing Charlie Rose’s efforts to get back on television as an example. “It doesn’t matter how much time [they’ve been out of work],” she insisted. “If they haven’t done the work, then why should they come back?” Still, Fonda maintained that she has “tremendous compassion for boys and men,” but that “we just have to fix them, or at least show them the way.”

“Men are trained not to be empathic, not to be emotional. So it’s not easy what they’re trying to do,” Fonda said of men who make an actual effort to better themselves. “But they have to try to do it! So it doesn’t matter if it’s been two weeks or two years. It just matters what kind of changes they’ve gone through.” In fact, Fonda said, “Why not do what the guys who lose their union jobs in Pennsylvania do? Work at Starbucks, f— it!”

“‘Oh, poor top-paid executives who can’t get his job back,’” Fonda added, voice thick with sarcasm. “F— it! Sweep the floor at Starbucks until you learn! If you can’t learn, you don’t belong in the boardroom. And there are plenty of women who do belong in the boardroom.”

Chloe Dykstra was relieved when Chris Hardwick got his job back at AMC because she thought the Internet lynch mob might finally leave her alone. They haven’t.

Apparently, you are racist and sexist if you had issues with that New York Magazine piece about Soon-Yi Previn.

Julie Chen Moonves will remain hosting Big Brother through next summer.

I have A LOT of feelings and thoughts about the Brett Kavanaugh attempted rape (ALLEGEDLY) situation, but, for reasons I can’t quite explain myself, I’m waiting to express them until the dust clears a bit. In the meantime, some things you should know:

Dr. Blasey Ford has agreed to testify under certain conditions; a right-wing nutjob thought that he was being helpful in proposing on Twitter a mistaken identity theory based on Zillow records, and slandered one of Kavanaugh’s fellow students as the possible attempted rapist in the process — Dr. Blasey Ford put out a statement saying that she knew both men and even visited the one Dipshit here tried to implicate when he was in the hospital, so, nah, bro, but nice gaslighting, Asshole; and President Handsy, who had been uncharacteristically quiet about the whole mess, finally decided to weigh in this morning in the most predictable possible way — by suggesting that it didn’t happen if Dr. Blasey Ford didn’t report it at the time:

… Because that’s not how it works? That’s not how any of this works? Also, fuck you, Tucker Carlson, while I’m at it?

New York Times columnist Charles Blow, who was abused as a child, shared his thoughts on why people don’t come forward.

Additionally, and more importantly, you should take the time to read this stunning, infuriating, heartbreaking piece in The Washington Post about a teenage girl who was raped by her fellow classmates here in Texas in 2006, and the horrors that happened to her after. You’ll never question why people are reluctant to come forward ever again. Amber Wyatt, you’ll likely never see this post, but you are brave and strong and I am sorry for everything that happened to you. Your story will stay with me forever, and I genuinely believe it will help someone — maybe many someones — in the future.

Renewals

Cancellations

In Development

Casting News

Mark Your Calendar

  • The Twilight Zone is coming (with host and producer Jordan Peele) to CBS All Access in 2019. It’s the one property that could make me consider subscribing to CBS All Access.
  • Supernatural will return on The CW on October 11.
  • Big Mouth returns on Netflix on October 9. BOOBS.
  • Star Trek Short Treks will debut on CBS All Access on October 4.
  • Marvel’s Daredevil will return on Netflix on October 19.
  • Empire returns on Fox on September 26.
  • Lessons from a School Shooting: Notes from Dunblane will debut on Netflix on September 28. It looks like a gut punch.
  • Little Things returns on Netflix on October 5.

R.I.P.

Perry Miller Adato, Emmy-winning documentary filmmaker

WATCH THIS

FRIDAY

Maniac: Emma Stone and Jonah Hill star in this new limited series about drug testing? I don’t know. What I do know is that it is from Cary Fukunaga, the guy who is responsible for True Detective season one being good. Series premiere. Netflix

The Good Cop: Tony Danza and Josh Groban star as father and son cops. Yes, that Tony Danza. Yes, that Josh Groban. I am not making any part of that up. Series premiere. Netflix

TKO: Season finale. 8 p.m., CBS

Killjoys: “Aneela brings the Jaqobis brothers into Greenspace to defeat the Lady.” OK. Season finale. 9 p.m., Syfy

SATURDAY

The Shape of Water: The most romantic film ever about a fish. 7 p.m., HBO

Rocky marathon: True fact: I saw ‘Rocky’ the very first time in Philadelphia about five years ago. 5:30 p.m., Viceland

Blow Out, Dressed to Kill & Carrie: A Brian De Palma marathon. 7 p.m., Epix Drive-

SUNDAY

9-1-1: The first responders have to deal with a vet with a live grenade in his leg. Welcome back, crazy. Season premiere. 7 p.m., Fox

Anthony Bourdain’s Parts Unknown: Bourdain takes W. Kamau Bell to Kenya in the first of the final episodes. Season premiere. 8 p.m., CNN

Celebrity Family Feud: The Kardashians vs. the Wests. Season finale. 7 p.m., ABC

$100,000 Pyramid: Season finale. 8 p.m., ABC

Late Night: The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: (Friday): Hillary Rodham Clinton, Nik Dodani Watch What Happens Live (Sunday): Jerry O’Connell, Toya Bush-Harris

 

FRI. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC Fresh Off the Boat
(repeat)
Speechless
(repeat)
Child Support
(repeat)
20/20
(new)
CBS MacGyver
(repeat)
TKO
(new)
Blue Bloods
(repeat)
CW Masters of Illusion
(new)
Masters of Illusion
(repeat)
Penn & Teller: Fool Us
(repeat)
Local
FOX The Resident
(repeat)
The Orville
(repeat)
Local
NBC I Feel Bad
(repeat)
I Feel Bad
(repeat)
Dateline
(new)

SAT. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30 10:00 10:30 11:00 11:30
ABC College Football: Stanford at Oregon
(live)
News/Local
CBS NCIS: Los Angeles
(repeat)
NCIS: New Orleans
(repeat)
48 Hours
(repeat)
News/Local
FOX College Football: Wisconsin at Iowa
(live)
News/Local
NBC America’s Got Talent
(repeat)
Dateline
(repeat)
News/Local Saturday Night Live
(repeat)

SUN. 6:00 6:30 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC America’s Funniest Home Videos
(repeat)
Celebrity Family Feud
(new)
The $100,000 Pyramid
(new)
The $100,000 Pyramid
(new)
CBS 60 Minutes
(new)
Big Brother
(new)
NCIS: Los Angeles
(repeat)
Madam Sectary
(repeat)
FOX The OT
(live)
9-1-1
(new)
Family Guy
(repeat)
Rel
(repeat)
Local/News
NBC Sunday Night Football: Patriot at Lions
(live)
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