This weekend, Arnold Schwarzenegger announced he is leaving Celebrity Apprentice, putting the reality show’s fate in limbo. This was hardly surprising considering this season’s ratings plunge and it shouldn’t be particularly big news. But it is kinda big news because Schwarzenegger claimed that he was leaving not because of Mark Burnett or the staff or the celebrities or NBC, but because of “baggage,” i.e. The President of the United States. Because The President of the United States is an executive producer of Celebrity Apprentice SOMEHOW, and because The President of the United States routinely tweeted insults and taunts at Schwarzenegger while the show was on, and because the day after the news broke that Schwarzenegger made the announcement he was leaving, our President, the most powerful man in the world, tweeted this:
And that dumb tweet is not even particularly remarkable except for the fact that Trump tweeted it literally 30 minutes after tweeting astonishing accusations that President Obama had wiretapped Trump Tower. The pundits spent all weekend dissecting Trump’s unhinged tweets about these supposed wiretaps, which I will not rehash. I will just point out the utter and complete insanity of following a public accusation against a former President — an accusation that, if true, would amount to the biggest political scandal of our time — with a tweet about a TV show half an hour later.
What. The. Actual. Fuck. Is. Happening. It’s 25th Amendment time, people. At the very least, Twitter should remove his accounts, per the creator of House of Cards‘ tweet argument.
In other Trump TV News
Here is a very long interview from New York Magazine with David Letterman and his beard in which he says this remarkably timely thing about “Trumpy”:
Trump’s the president and he can lie about anything from the time he wakes up to what he has for lunch and he’s still the president. I don’t get that. I’m tired of people being bewildered about everything he says: “I can’t believe he said that.” We gotta stop that and instead figure out ways to protect ourselves from him. We know he’s crazy. We gotta take care of ourselves here now.
It’s a great interview and worth reading the whole thing, but for my purposes here, I’m going to mention these comments about late night and their responsibility in this Trump era:
There is that obligation. We used to have a joke we’d do about booking guests: “Guess what?” “What?” “Neil Armstrong is going to be on the show.” “Neil Armstrong? That’s fantastic.” “He doesn’t want to talk about the moon.” I don’t want to criticize Jimmy Fallon, but I can only tell you what I would have done in that situation: I would have gone to work on Trump. But the thing about it is, you don’t have to concoct a complicated satirical premise to joke about Donald Trump. It’s not, “Two guys walk into a bar …”
Here’s an accompanying piece about the difficulties and blessings Trump has provided late night comedy. And here are just a bunch of Trump jokes from said late night personalities.
Kellyanne Conway just compared “Alternative Facts” to the Oscar screwup, calling it “fun.” Hopefully, I don’t have to explain why deliberately and knowingly lying to the American people is not the same thing as what happened to Moonlight.
Rachel Maddow and Tucker Fucking Carlson have shows in the top 10 of all TV these days because we can’t look away for a goddamn minute.
It turns out that the next season of American Horror Story might have Trump and Clinton in it after all? Because how on earth do you do a scary election story without Trump?
Oh, and SPOILER ALERT! on yesterday’s Last Man on Earth, but not only was Mike Pence president, they killed off the entire administration.
In Non-Trump TV News
Danny Masterson is under investigation for raping three women and the Church of Scientology is alleged to have tried to cover it up. And Leah Remini is NOT HAVING IT AT ALL. Go get him, girl.
Hey, here are a bunch of Game of Thrones set photos:
And apparently Mets pitcher Noah Syndergaard is going to be an extra in season 7 because that just makes sense.
I’m not sure where Neil Gaiman gets all the extra hours in his day, but he’s made a documentary to accompany American Gods.
Here’s a good interview with Mike Schur about The Good Place and that crazy-ass twist.
- Netflix wants more Gilmore Girls as much as you do.
- Comedian Jim Jeffries is receiving his own late-night talk show on Comedy Central which is his just reward after telling Piers Morgan to fuck off.
- AMC is working on a project based on the book The Age of Miracles.
- Amazon greenlit the racing series Le Mans: Racing is Everything.
- Netflix has picked up Korean zombie series Kingdom.
- One Day at a Time has been renewed by Netflix for a second season.
- Modern Family has edged closer to being renewed, but it hasn’t happened yet.
- The hilarious and wonderful Vinnie Jones is joining the ABC drama pilot, Deception.
- Peter Fonda is joining the cast of the Amazon series Tom Clancy’s Jack Ryan.
- John Corbett is going to be in the cast of Las Reinas, NBC’s drama pilot.
- Rosie Perez and Rarmian Newton are joining the NBC pilot Drama High.
- Patrick Fischler (LOST, Mad Men), Zabryna Guevara (Gotham) and Ritchie Coster (Blackhat) and has joined the cast of Happy! on Syfy.
- Max Theriot (Bates Motel) is joining CBS’s SEAL pilot.
- Chuku Modu (Game of Thrones) has joined the cast of the ABC pilot The Good Doctor.
- Eme Ikwuakor (Concussion, Extant), Isabelle Cornish (Australia Day, Puberty Blues), Mike Moh (Empire, Street Fighter: Assassin’s Fist), Sonya Balmores (Beyond the Break, Soul Surfer ), and Ellen Woglom (Californication, Outlaw) are joining the cast of ABC’s Marvel’s Inhumans. And now its cast is complete.
- Allison Miller is joining ABC’s crime pilot Salamander.
- Brenda Song is joining the cast of Real Life, CBS’s comedy pilot.
- Zach Appelman is joining CBS’s hate crimes unit pilot.
- Meredith Scott Lynn from Days of Our Lives has joined the Mendez Brothers Lifetime movie.
R.I.P. Antonia Gorga, mother of Teresa Giudice and Joe Gorga.
The Bachelor: The Women Tell All: In which the eliminated women pretend they weren’t secretly relieved. 8 p.m., ABC
Yo-Yo Ma and the Silk Road Ensemble: A documentary about the famous cellist and his touring group. 7 p.m., HBO
Origins: The Journey of Humankind: This new series explores the innovations that made us who we are, like fire, the wheel and pettiness. Series premiere. 8 p.m. National Geographic Channel
Late Night: The Late Late Show with James Corden: Patrick Stewart, Rupert Grint, Dan Stevens, New Kids on the Block Jimmy Kimmel Live: Emma Watson, Ian Somerhalder, Lady AnteBell Biv Devoe (mashup of Lady Antebellum and Bell Biv Devoe) Conan: Jesse Tyler Ferguson, Nasim Pedrad, Sinkane The Daily Show: Jennifer Lopez Watch What Happens Live: Jax Taylor, Kyle Cooke, Carl Radke
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