I HAVE A LOT OF THINGS TO YELL AT YOU ABOUT DONALD TRUMP AND THE FIRST AMENDMENT, SO GET READY.

So, apparently Donald J. Trump, the man who will be our next President barring some sort of beneficent God granting us a last-second miracle, called to Trump Tower representatives from all the networks, CNN and MSNBC so as to scream at them off-the-record about their coverage of him. Trump told Jeff Zucker: ‘I hate your network, everyone at CNN is a liar and you should be ashamed,’ and complained at NBC that they used an unflattering photo of him, showing him with a double chin.

He then went on YouTube to make a statement instead of holding a press conference where, you know, he might actually be asked questions by the press. This is the longest any modern President-elect has gone without having a news conference, by the way.

THEN, he went on Twitter this morning to yell at the New York Times for not agreeing to have an off-the-record meeting with him. The meeting has since been called back on, but the damage has been done.

See this for what it is: an unprecedented attack on the free press. Coming after journalists — when they have agreed to be off-the-record no less — and yelling at them because he didn’t care for their coverage of him is an act of intimidation, pure and simple. The press is the fourth estate, and their job is to report on the government which they can only do if there is no fear of reprisal from the government. Everyone, and I mean everyone, should be outraged and upset that our incoming President has so little regard for the FIRST FUCKING AMENDMENT.

I AM NOT DONE YET.

So, there is a long background on this one, but bear with me. The guy who coined the bullshit phrase “alt-right” held a neo-Nazi conference in Washington D.C. on Saturday — where he and the crowd gave a “Heil Trump” in case you were wondering. He also attacked the media thusly:

Mr. Spencer’s after-dinner speech began with a polemic against the “mainstream media,” before he briefly paused. “Perhaps we should refer to them in the original German?” he said.

The audience immediately screamed back, “Lügenpresse,” reviving a Nazi-era word that means “lying press.”

Mr. Spencer suggested that the news media had been critical of Mr. Trump throughout the campaign in order to protect Jewish interests. He mused about the political commentators who gave Mr. Trump little chance of winning.

“One wonders if these people are people at all, or instead soulless golem,” he said, referring to a Jewish fable about the golem, a clay giant that a rabbi brings to life to protect the Jews.”

CNN decided to cover this charming incident by running a chyron that read “Alt-Right Founder Questions if Jews Are People” and people were not OK with it for some mysterious reason. Among those people: Jake Tapper himself. WHAT IS ACTUALLY HAPPENING IN THIS WORLD RIGHT NOW.

Sean Hannity, following his hero’s example, had a Twitter meltdown after Megyn Kelly said in an interview that pro-Trump reporters “would arrange with Trump in advance to ask him certain critical questions or do certain hits on him so they would appear to have some credibility.” She did not name names, but Hannity is preeeeeeety sure she was talking about him. (For some reason, Carly Simon’s songbook comes to mind.)

Instead of decrying Nazis celebrating in his name, Trump has, as I’m sure you’ve heard, been spending his time attacking Broadway shows and Saturday Night Live instead. A+++ TIME MANAGEMENT. VERY GOOD USE OF PODIUM. Kellyanne Conway’s defense of this nonsense: “Focus on what he did this week as your president-elect, which was unbelievable.” OH IT WAS UNBELIEVABLE ALRIGHT.

Here’s who Jimmy Kimmel thinks Donald Trump should apologize to before Hamilton apologizes to Mike Pence:

And Stephen Colbert offers Trump his own Hamilton spin-off:

Anyway, the whole Hamilton thing is tearing America apart, including the E Street Band (which I know has nothing to do with television but I don’t care, my blog, my rules), and SNL star Pete Davidson has a very mature response to his next President. And here is SNL’s Michael Che saying a bunch of toothless things about Donald Trump that make me kinda angry at him.

BUT DO NOT BE DISTRACTED BY IMMATURE TWEETS AT COMEDIANS AND THEATER KIDS. FOCUS YOUR ANGER AT TRUMP IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION.

Here’s Seth Meyers saying the same thing, but funnier:

Remember how Gigi Hadid did a harmless impersonation of Melania on the AMAs? Obviously she apologized after 24 hours of being attacked for it. And as for that Green Day performance, they kept the anti-Trump parts secret during rehearsals. They, fortunately for my sanity, have not apologized.

Shonda Rhimes talks about how being a writer in the age of Trump is power, and she’s going to use that power by killing off your favorite characters on her overheated primetime soaps.

Oh, and a Chechen warlord has created his own version of The Apprentice.

cool cool cool community ahmed.gif

OH BUT OK HERE ARE ‘5 FUN FACTS ABOUT A CHARLIE BROWN THANKSGIVING EVERYTHING IS WONDERFUL AND THE WORLD IS NOT ON FIRE.

~deep breath~

We haven’t had any Game of Thrones spoilers recently, so here’s a biggie that involves a reunion that is a long time coming, and two characters who have never met before cross paths in an interesting way.  And here are a bunch of pictures of the Lannisters moving around. The most interesting part of that second post actually comes towards the end and it is regarding swords. I hope all of that was vague enough.

The big TV news today is that James Corden is going to host the Grammys, in what will presumably be one long round of Carpool Karaoke.

In news we can use right now, Dave Chappelle is doing three Netflix specials.

Here is the trailer for Barry, the Netflix film about Barack Obama’s origin story:

I honestly do not know what is bigger news: that Dune is maybe being turned into a TV series or that Snowpiercer is definitely being turned into a TV series.

In other development news:

Showtime is getting you ready for the Twin Peaks reboot by streaming all of the original series over the holidays. And for you children who have never seen it, Blue Velvet will also be available.

Two renewals worth noting: VH1 has picked up a second season of Martha & Snoop’s Potluck Dinner Party; and Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency has been renewed for a second season by BBC America.

But it’s looking like Pure Genius is about to be purely cancelled on CBS.

Unsurprisingly if only based on my son’s enthusiasm, The Grand Tour set a streaming record for Amazon.

Here’s another sketch SNL cut instead of that QVC audition sketch. I will never understand.

BREAKING NEWS: Chevy Chase is a huge asshole.

WATCH THIS

Dancing with the Stars: A winner is chosen and then it goes away again for a whole 4 months or something. Season finale. 8 p.m., ABC

This is Us: Randall learns a doozy of a secret about his mom and birth father in the Thanksgiving episode. 8 p.m., NBC

Brooklyn Nine-Nine: Jimmy Smits is Amy’s father in a bit of casting that is PERFECTION. 7 p.m., Fox

Late Night: Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon: Sarah Jessica Parker, Frank Pellegrino Jr. Late Night with Seth Meyers: Gayle King, Ben Platt, a performance from Broadway’s “Dear Evan Hansen” The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: James Marsden, John Waters The Late Late Show with James Corden: Aaron Eckhart, Trevor Noah, Green Day Jimmy Kimmel Live: Bono, Julia Roberts, Channing Tatum, Kristen Bell, DJ Khaled, Neil Patrick Harris, Halsey, the Killers

TUES. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC The Middle
(new)
American Housewife
(new)
Dancing with the Stars
(live)
CBS NCIS
(new)
Bull
(new)
NCIS: New Orleans
(new)
CW The Flash
(new)
No Tomorrow
(new)
Local
FOX Brooklyn Nine-Nine
(new)
New Girl
(new)
Scream Queens
(new)
News/Local
NBC The Voice
(new)
This is Us
(new)
Chicago Fire
(new)
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