Dramatic dog is dramatic:
@pubity The way he didn’t flinch at all at the end 😭😭😭 (Raegan Sumner via @ViralHog) #pubity
Here’s A BUNCH OF TV News
OK, this is maybe my favorite story of the week, it’s so delicious:
Remember last year when that fucko Ron DeSantis announced his plan for the “Don’t Say Gay” bill in Florida, the bill that would prohibit educators from discussing gender identity or sexual orientation in K-3 classrooms and was basically a Trojan horse for similar legislation for all classrooms through high school?
Right, so at the time Disney’s CEO Bob Chapek made a bunch of mealy-mouthed both-sides statements about how Disney was going to “stay out of politics” because corporate statements don’t really do anything to change minds. Disney employees were understandably PISSED. After all, Disney is one of the most — if not THE most — powerful corporations headquartered in Florida, and if they wanted to use their political pull to protect their employees, this was the time to do it. Eventually, Chapek capitulated to his employees and publicly denounced the bill at a corporate shareholder’s meeting.
To punish Disney for daring to say that discriminating against LGBTQ folks is mean, Ron DeSantis and his cronies announced that they would be revoking Disney’s special district called the Reedy Creek Improvement District. The district allowed Disney to be in control over their own community services like the fire department and utilities, saving Florida taxpayers literally billions since 1967. In return, the state largely stayed out of Disney’s business. NO LONGER, declared DeSantis, and he announced his plan to replace the board of the Reedy Creek Improvement with his own panel of weirdos who think that tap water is turning people gay (true story). They had all sorts of plans to use this cudgel to control Disney and make them unwoke themselves and bring back the white Little Mermaid and ban all gay people on ABC shows or some bullshit, who knows.
Curiously, Disney didn’t make a whole huge fuss about this. There was no big angry statement, no press conferences, just a quiet reply that Disney would explore their legal options. And this is where it becomes fucking hilarious. Yesterday, the new board announced that Disney’s lawyers weren’t actually stupid. On February 8th, the Reedy Creek Improvement Development held a PUBLIC HEARING in which they rolled back the board’s powers to be able to do anything in the district without Disney’s approval for decades. Disney can still do whatever they want in the district and the board can’t do shit ever or until “21 years after the death of the last survivor of the descendants of King Charles III, king of England.”
Basically, this weird inclusion of King Charles’ grandkids into this mess is a means to get around contract perpetuity issues — legally, you can’t just say something will exist forever and ever and ever and ever, you have to create a specific time when it will end, based on a living person lifespan plus 21 years — but it’s also clearly some sort of inside joke on the lawyers’ parts (and my favorite part of it is that it is going to [inadvertently or not] spawn all sorts of crazy lizard-people conspiracy theories tied to the royal family).
Keep the lawyers you know in your thoughts tonight. Because we will never have a professional burn as great as the Disney attorney who used the Rule Against Perpetuities to pile drive DeSantis. https://t.co/63QEL5TQ9N
— Christina (@christina_brown) March 30, 2023
Look future law students, yes learning about the rule against perpetuities can be a pain, but when it has the power to dunk on a grandstanding nascent autocrat who likes to ban books and eat pudding like a weirdo, we can all agree it was worth it
— Rally Hudson (@rallyhudson) March 30, 2023
I look forward to Lilibet’s Law being taught to ever first year law student. https://t.co/qx6tCfaXnd
— Sherrilyn Ifill (@SIfill_) March 30, 2023
Actually, my favorite part is that Disney’s lawyers did all of this OUT IN THE OPEN, and DeSantis and his idiots were completely outplayed. All it would have taken to know this was coming would have been to have someone attend that public meeting last month, but instead, everyone on DeSantis’ team were so confident of their own bullshit that they were completely blindsided.
Honestly, though, anyone who thought DeSantis was going to be able to outsmart the lawyers of one of the most powerful corporations in the world were deluding themselves — and this group clearly includes DeSantis himself. I mean, Disney had public domain law rewritten for the entire country so as to protect their financial interests; did this idiot really think that Disney wouldn’t do something to protect themselves from a would-be pocket dictator? Apparently not! So 1. I would very much like the media to quit tripping over themselves to paint DeSantis as some sort of political mastermind who will be able to bring the Former Autocrat’s followers and the mainstream GOP back together and 2. I predict this is the beginning of the end of DeSantis’ presidential ambitions. I can’t stop cackling about this.
Jennifer Aniston is out here whinging that some younger people find Friends “offensive.” Well, yeah, our standards have changed in the past 25 years. But also, what’s the real complaint here? People are still watching Friends, so much so that it makes — and I’m not exaggerating here — more than $1 billion a year, earning the cast members $20 million a year in residuals. So, it’s not exactly like Friends has been canceled by anyone, calm the fuck down.
Mike Flanagan might be pitching a Clayface movie (for those of you, like me, who don’t know who Clayface is, he’s a gloopy-faced villain in the Batman universe), but he is tamping down any expectation that it is happening:
Re: CLAYFACE – the news today is entirely speculative. When or if something like that ever becomes real, I promise I'll tell you guys. 🙂
— Mike Flanagan (@flanaganfilm) March 29, 2023
Raquel Leviss‘ restraining order against Scheana Shay has been dropped, lol.
Fenton Bailey and Randy Barbato, the Emmy-winning producers of RuPaul’s Drag Race, call the wave of anti-drag and anti-trans legislation sweeping across the country, “insidious” and “anti-American” and THEY AIN’T WRONG.
And drag queens aren’t going away, no matter how much these babies cry about it. An entire Drag Race Universe channel has just launched on Freevee.
Daniel Radcliffe will moderate a conversation with trans and nonbinary youth in a series of YouTube videos. SO SUCK IT, J.K. ROWLING.
Well, this isn’t a great look for a “news” company: Suzanne Scott, the Fox News CEO, said in a memo that fact-checking was “bad for business.”
In an email, Fox CEO Suzanne Scott responds to Fox's Eric Shawn fact-checking a Trump falsehood: "This has to stop now… this is bad business… the audience is furious and we are just feeding them material." pic.twitter.com/6yDMzst5f5
— Matthew Gertz (@MattGertz) March 29, 2023
Evan Gerschkovich, a Wall Street Journal reporter, has been detained in Russia, accused of being a useful bargaining chip a spy. Honestly, though, all Americans need to get the fuck out of that country already.
You can’t get the ad-supported tier of Disney+ on Roku because there aren’t enough ads to go around.
But, man, if you live in this cynical, judgmental, snarky, “I’m working on this thing, but it’s a piece of shit” — that stuff will come back to haunt you. I was embarrassed about Boy Meets World and should not have been. A lot of people loved it.
I made it fairly clear that it was like, “Oh man, this is not my type of comedy,” and that was a monster mistake. And they were right to let me go.
It’s a very important lesson that I learned embarrassingly late in life, but that every adult should come to terms with: NOT EVERYTHING IS MADE OR MEANT FOR YOU AND THAT IS OK. So many of our political problems right now stem from a small minority of people becoming angry because they are seeing things reflected in culture that they don’t like or understand or can identify with, and instead of just accepting that not everything is made or meant for them and that is OK, they are attempting to ban it outright. Stupid. This is a stupid time.
Pipin Ferreras, a free diver whose life loosely inspired the Netflix film No Limit, is suing the streamer for defamation claiming that they falsely suggested that he killed his wife.
Love is dead because Quibi was a failure.
Actually, love isn’t dead as long as these two are together:
.@JasonRitter opens up about having to address his alcoholism when he first started dating @melanielynskey. pic.twitter.com/Nw4Glxnw4i
— The Drew Barrymore Show (@DrewBarrymoreTV) March 29, 2023
Hoping Anna “Chickadee” Cardwell from Here Comes Honey Boo Boo recovers soon.
Renewals
- The Night Agent has been renewed for a second season on Netflix.
- Blue Bloods has been renewed at CBS for season 14.
- It Couldn’t Happen Here has been renewed at SundanceTV for a second season.
Cancellations
- Dancing with Myself has been canceled after one season on NBC.
In Development
- Scott Pilgrim: The Anime is coming to Netflix.
- A Snowfall spinoff starring Gail Bean is in the works at FX.
- Jentry Chau vs. The Underworld has been ordered at Netflix.
- The Pick-Up, starring Eddie Murphy, has been bought by Prime Video.
- A comedy set in an Inuk community has been ordered at Netflix.
- The Breakfast Club is coming to BET.
- Wasted, a family dramedy from Ambreen Razia is being developed.
Casting News
- David Alan Grier will co-star in the NBC comedy pilot St. Denis Medical.
- Demetrius Grosse has been cast in Wonder Man on Disney+.
- Yul Vazquez will co-star in Hotel Cocaine on MGM+.
- Annemarie Wiley has joined The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills on Bravo.
- Laverne Cox will return on The Blacklist on NBC.
- Roman Kemp will host The Finish Line on BBC.
Mark Your Calendars
- Barry returns on HBO on April 16.
- Awkwafina Is Nora From Queens returns on Comedy Central on April 26.
- Single Drunk Female returns on Freeform on April 12.
- American Manhunt: The Boston Marathon Bombing will premiere on Netflix on April 12.
- Unicorn: Warriors Eternal premieres on Adult Swim and HBO Max on May 4.
- Queens on the Run will premiere on April 14 on Netflix.
- CNN News Central will debut on CNN on April 3.
- Fargo returns this year on FX.
- Heavenly Delusion will debut on Hulu on April 1.
- Split Second debuts on Game Show Network on April 17.
- Fix My Flip returns on HGTV on May 4.
- Crater will debut on Disney+ on May 12.
- My Journey to 50 will premiere on BET on June 15.
- Beginning in May, Adult Swim will air an hour earlier than previously.
R.I.P.
N’Neka Garland, Emmy-winning General Hospital producer. She also happened to be the half-sister of Tupac Shakur
sorry folks, memorializing. Bad speller at the onset, even worse when sad.
— Nancy Lee Grahn (@NancyLeeGrahn) March 30, 2023
Bill Leavy, Longtime NFL referee
Keith Reid, Procul Harum lyricist who co-wrote “Whiter Shade of Pale”
WATCH THIS
Unstable: Rob Lowe and his son John Owen star in this new comedy about an introverted son who has to work for his eccentric father to save his dad’s business from disaster. Series premiere. Netflix
Alaska Daily: Eileen and Roz find a lead before an innocent man is locked away. Season finale. 9 p.m., ABC
Rapcaviar Presents: This new documentary series explores provocative issues through the stories of hip-hop stars. Series premiere. Hulu
Late Night:
- Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon: Edward Norton, Ego Nwodim, Parker McCollum
- Late Night with Seth Meyers: Taron Egerton, Maude Apatow, Fred Armisen
- The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: Brooke Shields, Clint Smith, Weyes Blood
- The Late Late Show with James Corden: Kevin Bacon, Kyra Sedgwick, Dustin Nickerson
- Jimmy Kimmel Live: Viola Davis, Julius Tennon, Brett Goldstein, Daniel Caesar
- The Daily Show: Guest host John Leguizamo
THUR | 7:00 | 7:30 | 8:00 | 8:30 | 9:00 | 9:30 |
ABC | Station 19 (new) |
Grey’s Anatomy (new) |
Alaska Daily (new) |
CBS | Young Sheldon (new) |
Ghosts (new) |
So Help Me Todd (new) |
CSI: Vegas (new) |
CW | Walker (new) |
Superman & Lois (repeat) |
News/Local |
FOX | Next Level Chef (new) |
Animal Control (new) |
Call Me Kat (new) |
News/Local |
NBC | Law & Order (new) |
Law & Order: SVU (new) |
Law & Order: Organized Crime (new) |
I hope you enjoyed your bottle of champagne tonight, thanks to the news from the New York Times, amongst others. I enjoyed mine. Next step: the perp walk. Now if Georgia would only indict……..
Oh, and my almost-one-year-old puppy is named Lilibet. (I named her after the Queen, who I think was a wonderful woman.) I haven’t told her about the Disney news yet, I don’t want her to get a swelled head. Don’t mess with the Mouse!
Great stuff about DeathSantis! Micky Mouse Rocks‼️
Happy to know “Nora From Queens” is coming back. What a delightful little show!