It’s going to be a rough week in Trumpville, and I CAN’T WAIT.

Impeachment Corner!

It’s going to be a rough week for the electoral-college-elected President of the United States. Congress is in recess, but Adam Schiff never sleeps, and he’s made it clear that this week he will be releasing the transcripts of the depositions that they have taken so far. In fact, they just released two transcripts: that of Marie Yovanovitch, the former Ukrainian diplomat who was removed from her post allegedly at Giuliani and his goons’ behest and Michael McKinley, a former aide to Secretary of State Mike Pompeo.

President Can’t Keep His Story Straight is not taking this development well:

Hey, did I mention that one of the things Lt. Col. Vindman testified to was that not only were there omissions in the transcript that was released, but that someone actually changed the text:

It is not clear why some of Colonel Vindman’s changes were not made, but the decision by a White House lawyer to quickly lock down the reconstructed transcript subverted the normal process of handling such documents, according to people familiar with the matter.

The note-takers and voice recognition software used during the July 25 call had missed Mr. Zelensky saying the word “Burisma,” according to people briefed on the matter, but the reconstructed transcript does refer to “the company,” and suggests that the Ukrainian president is aware that it is of great interest to Mr. Trump.

So, once again, The President of the United States is accusing others of committing the crimes he’s committing.

But back to Lt. Col. Vindman — according to his testimony, after hearing The Phone Call, Vindman went to White House Counsel John Eisenberg with his concerns. Eisenberg decided to move the transcript to the sooper-secret server, and, a few days later, told Vindman TO KEEP HIS TRAP SHUT.

Eisenberg recorded Vindman’s complaints in notes on a yellow legal pad, then conferred with his deputy Michael Ellis about how to handle the conversation because it was clearly “sensitive,” Vindman testified. The lawyers then decided to move the record of the call into the NSC’s top-secret codeword system—a server normally used to store highly classified material that only a small group of officials can access.

Vindman did not consider the move itself as evidence of a cover-up, according to a person familiar with his testimony. But he said he became disturbed when, a few days later, Eisenberg instructed him not to tell anyone about the call—especially because it was Vindman’s job to coordinate the interagency process with regard to Ukraine policy.


Lt. Col. Vindman, this Purple Heart-awarded HERO, he has President Bone Spurs skerrred, and he is blatantly threatening him now:

But, listen, the thing is President Dipshit and his supporters, they only have a few plays here: claiming the people who are testifying are #NeverTrumpers; that there was no quid pro quo; but even if there was quid pro quo, it’s not that bad, and certainly not bad enough to impeach.

I mean, just look at this one comment from President BrokenBrain:

Oh, and he’s still whining about the Whistleblower and demanding that they come forward:

OK, two things about this: 1. He gave written answers to Robert Mueller during his investigation and 2. It’s beyond hypocritical to demand that the Whistleblower testify WHILE AT THE SAME TIME BLOCKING EVERYONE FROM THE WHITE HOUSE FROM TESTIFYING.

Because they are straight-up refusing to show up: John Eisenberg and Robert Blair, an aide to Mick Mulvaney refused to come today, and Brian McCormack, an Office of Management and Budget official, and Michael Ellis, another White House lawyer aren’t expected to show up this afternoon. Rick Perry has said he’s not testifying and John Bolton is saying he’s waiting to hear what the courts have to say about whether or not his deputy, Charles Kupperman, has to testify.

In other bad news for President Ding-Dong: an appeals court says that he has to release his tax returns to Manhattan prosecutors. They are going to appeal to the Supreme Court on this one, so it’s not like the returns are going anywhere. FOR NOW.

E. Jean Carroll, the advice columnist who publicly accused him of raping her, is suing President Grab ‘Em By The Pussy for defamation. Good luck and godspeed, Ms. Carroll.

And following being booed at the World Series, President Malignant Narcissist went to a UFC event in Manhattan with his sons and a couple of Republican lickspittles because who is going to love President Tough Guy more than a UFC crowd, right?

Finally, just another reminder from the desk of This Is All Really Very Simple: the President withheld necessary and Congressionally-appropriated military aid from an ally in exchange for political dirt on his rival. That’s it. And that is fucking impeachable.

In Other TV News

Seth Meyers’ Netflix stand-up special, Lobby Baby, will debut tomorrow, and for those of you who are SICK TO DEATH of hearing about Donald “Jesus, How Are We Still Dealing With This Guy” Trump, he’s included a handy “SKIP POLITICS” button. (Note: I will not be using said button.)

His Dark Materials debuts on HBO tonight (I will not be blogging it because I am already 3 or 4 episodes behind on both The Walking Dead and Stumptown and I never even finished Bachelor in Paradise). Here is the producer talking about bringing that story to life in the full and rich way which it deserved.

This is a good list of potential Targaryen storylines House of the Dragon might explore, but if we’re all being honest, we know it’s either going to be about Aegon’s conquest of Westeros or the Dance of the Dragons, right?

Ellen DeGeneres will be the first person to receive the Carol Burnett Award from The Golden Globes who is not named “Carol Burnett.”

Jared Padalecki did not make an appearance at DC Con this weekend (where our own Whitney was in attendance), but he did send a message to fans thanking them for their support. Ackles: “We all miss my big, dumb friend.” He added, “I’ll just say it now, he had a bad weekend last weekend. He’s dealing with what he’s gotta deal with so just send him support and some love and have a good weekend this weekend.”

Honestly, it sounds like the background actor had it coming.

Vicki Gunvalson is suing her Real Housewives of Orange County co-star Kelly Dodd for defamation. Yeah, this sounds about right.



  • InBetween has been canceled at NBC after one season.
  • Pearson has been canceled at USA after one season.

In Development

Casting News

Mark Your Calendar

  • The New Pope returns on HBO in January.
  • Green Eggs and Ham will debut on Netflix on November 8.


Brian Tarantina, Prolific actor known most recently for his work on The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel

Rudy Boesch, Survivor’s oldest contestant

Walter Mercado, The fabulous Puerto Rican astrologer

Barry Frank, Creator of American Gladiator, among other sports-adjacent shows, sports agent and negotiator

Ann Crumb, Actress known best for her Broadway roles


His Dark Materials: The beloved Philip Pullman fantasy series is brought to life (again) in this new show starring Ruth Wilson and Lin-Manuel Miranda. Series premiere. 8 p.m., HBO

The Devil Next Door: A five-part documentary about John Demjanjuk, who was either a modest Ukrainian immigrant who made a new life in Cleveland or Ivan the Terrible, an infamous Nazi guard. Netflix

Vice Presents: Cults and Extreme Belief: Well, I am not sure how this series passed my notice when it debuted, but it’s on my radar now. This episode explores the FLDS who are complete nutjobs. 7 p.m., Viceland

Late Night:

  • Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon: Chris Evans, Naomi Scott, EarthGang
  • Late Night with Seth Meyers: Gloria Steinem, Ahmir “Questlove” Thompson, Tariq “Black Thought” Trotter, Brendan Buckley
  • The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: Tim McGraw, Sen. Sherrod Brown
  • The Late Late Show with James Corden: Jessica Biel, Natasha Lyonne, Chris Garcia
  • Jimmy Kimmel Live: Sterling K. Brown, Luke Combs
  • The Daily Show: Colson Whitehead
  • Conan: Matt Damon
  • Lights Out with David Spade: Randy & Jason Sklar, Hannah Hart
  • Watch What Happens Live: Caroline Rhea, Ashton Pienaar
  • A Little Late with Lily Singh: Lake Bell, Jason Clarke


MON. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC Dancing with the Stars
The Good Doctor
CBS The Neighborhood
Bob Hearts Abishola
All Rise
CW All American
Black Lightning
FOX 9-1-1
Prodigal Son
NBC The Voice
Bluff City Law

Leave a Reply