The new Golden Bachelor is really sorry for saying the most disqualifying thing possible, you guys.


Gimme labubu.

 

 
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Here’s A BUNCH OF TV News

No big deal, but the Smithsonian is literally rewriting history for President Shit-Gibbon.

Related: “I always believed that, as fragile as our democracy is, our systems would be strong enough to defend our most fundamental principles,” Kamala Harris said on The Late Show last night. “And I think right now that they’re not as strong as they need to be.”

Skydance would like you to know that they did not cancel The Late Show with Stephen Colbert, nor did they bribe President Globulous, how dare you suggest otherwise.

Guess how many minutes Fox News spent on the Jeffrey Epstein story between Monday and Thursday of this week. Now, guess how many minutes they spent on the Sydney Sweeney/American Eagle commercial. Go ahead, guess.

Jon Stewart recalls his meeting with Fox News’ leader at the time, Roger Ailes, who wanted Stewart to THANK HIM for giving him his career. Malignant narcissism, baby!

The next Golden Bachelor, Mel Owens, is SO SORRY for the things he said about 99% of the incoming cast being too old for him to date, you guys. And he really means it, don’t fire him. 🙄

Just so we all recall, Owens told a podcast that he told producers he would only date women between the ages of 45 and 60 (despite being 66 himself), and would eliminate everyone older. There is literally only one woman on the current cast who is under 60, SO GOOD LUCK, MEL. (I genuinely can not believe they are keeping this jabroni.)

Michelle Obama loves some Bravo reality nonsense, and who am I to judge? (I do not judge.)

“What a f—ing a–hole. Yeah, a very bad, bad, bad character.” — Seth Rogan on The Valley‘s Jax Taylor, and where’s the lie?

Team Tariq.

The Hulu documentary Trophy Wife: Murder on Safari left out some stuff, including an assassination attempt and just how many people this man was cheating with.

It looks like Harry and Meghan’s PR team bounced back and is countering the story that Netflix is dropping them. 

Ellen DeGeneres is “SHOCKED!” to learn that her staff on The Ellen DeGeneres Show was scared of her. Ma’am. Where have you been for the past five years?

Nadji Jeter, the actor who played Malcolm-Jamal Warner’s son on Reed Between the Lines, wrote a lovely tribute to his on-screen father, and real-life father figure.

I will not be celebrating Hulk Hogan Day, thank you very much.

Get well soon, Justin Timberlake.

In Development

  • A Hostel series starring Paul Giamatti is in the works at Peacock.

Casting News

Mark Your Calendar

  • Wayward will premiere on Netflix on September 25.

  • Long Story Short will debut on Netflix on August 22.

  • KPopped will premiere on Apple TV+ on August 29.

  • Katrina: Come Hell or High Water will premiere on Netflix on August 27.

  • The Chrisleys: Back to Reality will premiere on Lifetime on September 1.

  • Eenie Meanie debuts on Hulu on August 22.

  • Peripheral will debut on BET+ on August 7.

  • 90 Day Fiancé: The Other Way returns on TLC on September 8.

  • Crossroad Springs will premiere on Great American Family on August 30.

  • Big Dreams: Little League World Series 2024 premieres on ESPN on August 12.

  • The Echoes of Survivors: Inside Korea’s Tragedies premieres on Netflix on August 15.

  • Fall for Me premieres on Netflix on August 21.

  • Barbie Mysteries: Beach Detectives will premiere on Netflix on August 28.

  • A sampling of 15 British series from BritBox will be available on HBO Max from August 1 through September 29, including the original The Office, Luther, Agatha Christie’s Murder Is Easy, Seasons 1 and 2 of Blue Lights, Father Brown, The Inspector Lynley Mysteries, Shakespeare & Hathaway, Silent Witness, Sister Bonaface, The Sixth Commandment, Seasons 1 and 2 of Time, Three Little Birds and Why Didn’t They Ask Evans?
  • The Woman in Cabin 10 will debut on Netflix on October 10.
  • A marathon of Leave It to Beaver will air on FETV on August 3.
  • A marathon of The Flintstones will air on MeTV Toons on August 31 to celebrate the 65th anniversary of the iconic animated series.
  • Celebrations with Lacey Chabert returns on Hallmark Channel on September 15.

R.I.P.

Flaco Jiménez, Grammy-winning Conjunto legend and Texas icon

Nicholas Clapp, Documentarian, author, and amateur archaeologist

Robert Wilson, Experimental theater director, playwright, and choreographer

WATCH THIS

FRIDAY

Chief of War: Jason Momoa stars as the Hawaiian chieftain Ka’iana, who tries to unite the Islands before Western colonization in this new series. Series premiere.  Apple TV+

Perfect Match: The Bachelor’s Clayton and Rachel are forced back into each other’s lives this season on Netflix’s competitive dating series. Season premiere. Netflix

Borderline: Samara Weaving stars in this darkly comedic thriller as a ’90s pop star whose home is invaded by an obsessive fan.  Peacock

SATURDAY

Final Destination Bloodlines: A college student seeks out the one person who can break the cycle and save her family in the 6th installment. 7 p.m., HBO

Final Destination marathon: But before watching Bloodlines, check out the first five movies; you don’t want to miss out on the mythology. 11:10 a.m., HBO

SUNDAY

Yogurt Shop Murders: This new documentary series explores the vicious 1991 Austin crime that haunts Texans still. Premiere. 9 p.m., HBO

1,000 Ways to Dine: Host Michael Yo visits the most unique and unusual restaurants in the world. Series premiere. 7 a.m., A&E

Naming the Dead: This new National Geographic series follows the DNA Doe project, a groundbreaking nonprofit organization that uses genetics to break some of the most confounding cold cases. Series premiere.  Disney+

Eyes of Wakanda: Wakanda warriors throughout the centuries travel the world to collect dangerous vibranium artifacts in this new animated series. Disney+

FRI. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC Celebrity Jeopardy!
(new)
20/20
CBS Fire Country
(repeat)
Fire Country
(repeat)
Fire Country
(repeat)
CW Penn & Teller: Fool Us
(repeat)
Totally Funny Animals
(new)
Totally Funny Kids
(new)
FOX The Fixer
(new)
Local
NBC Happy’s Place
(repeat)
Happy’s Place
(repeat)
Dateline


SAT. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30 10:00 10:30 11:00 11:30
ABC Press Your Luck
(repeat)
Press Your Luck
(repeat)
Press Your Luck
(repeat)
News/Local
CBS FBI: International
(repeat)
48 Hours 48 Hours News/Local
FOX MLB Baseball
(live)
News/Local
NBC The Wall
(repeat)
Dateline News/
Local
Saturday Night Live
(repeat)


SUN. 6:00 6:30 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC America’s Funniest Home Videos
(repeat)
America’s Funniest Home Videos
(repeat)
Freaky Friday
CBS 60 Minutes Big Brother
(new)
Tracker
(repeat)
Tracker
(repeat)
The CW Bad Boys II Local/News
FOX Gordon Ramsay’s Secret Service
(repeat)
The Simpsons
(repeat)
Krap-opolis
(repeat)
Animal Control
(new)
Going Dutch
(new)
Local/News
NBC American Ninja Warrior
(repeat)
America’s Got Talent
(repeat)

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