Nothing says the weekend like an emu playing with a sprinkler. pic.twitter.com/94xCVsKcvS
— Paul Bronks (@SlenderSherbet) September 3, 2022
Here’s A BUNCH OF TV News
Today is the end of the second round of TV Foolishness Tournament, so be sure to vote. Today’s winner will compete against yesterday’s winners (see below) for the category prize on Monday — so this is BIG STAKES.
In the event that yesterday’s results are not visible for some dumb reason, we have some exciting — and unexpected results:
New Fall TV Shows: The Real Love Boat
Classic Shows I Should Have Recapped, but Didn’t: Game of Thrones
Shows I Began Recapping, and Then Gave Up On, Including Hate Blogs: American Horror Story (Over The Orville! I can’t believe it either!)
Reader Suggestions: Fleabag
H’oh boy, I really didn’t want to spend the majority of this post talking about Queen Elizabeth, but here we are.
The Queen’s funeral is expected to take place ten days from now, the exact date to be announced sometime soon by Buckingham Palace (but likely, the 18th or 19th.) The full plans for her lying in state and funeral can be found here.
Here is a roundup of tributes planned for the Queen to air this weekend on the major broadcasters.
The Crown is going to halt production temporarily out of respect.
The Premiere League is postponing this weekend’s games “as a mark of respect.” (The husband is very mad.)
BAFTA has canceled this weekend’s scheduled TV Tea Party.
The announcement of the Queen’s death was viewed live by some 33 million people in the United Kingdom. The news that her health was an issue of concern threw U.K. televisions schedules into chaos yesterday (and overtook American news, as well).
And just today, King Charles’ speech today cut off the final scene that Days of Our Lives will ever air on NBC.
The NFL honored her with a moment of silence which … whaaaaaaat? I mean, but, why?
James Corden, I get. But the NFL?
For my whole life Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth II has always been there. In my childhood I can recall watching her wedding highlights on TV. I remember her as a beautiful young lady, to the much beloved grandmother of the nation. My deepest sympathies are with the Royal family. pic.twitter.com/3JLILZDKwK
— Mick Jagger (@MickJagger) September 8, 2022
God bless Queen Elizabeth II
May she rest in peace
Long live The KingPaul McCartney pic.twitter.com/fK9wXqkAsa
— Paul McCartney (@PaulMcCartney) September 8, 2022
I mourn with my country the passing of our greatest Queen. With a heavy heart I say it is devastating the thought of England without Queen Elizabeth II pic.twitter.com/JZYXGRz2hb
— Ozzy Osbourne (@OzzyOsbourne) September 8, 2022
Um, guys? Do you know what your musical is about?
— Hamilton West End (@HamiltonWestEnd) September 8, 2022
HOLD UP, The Queen’s death has caused Kanye West to stop beefing? Alright, this is funnier than the NFL’s moment of silence.
Here is a collection of portrayals of Queen Elizabeth in films and TV.
A look back on all the SNL impersonations of the Queen — but truly, it was Scott Thompson of Kids in the Hall who did her best:
I take that back … The Queen herself was the best spoof of the Queen. It was her idea to do that James Bond bit for the Olympics, by the way, and who can blame her for wanting to hang out with Daniel Craig?
And then, of course, there was this:
What an exceptionally beautiful thing this was. Thinking of the entire family at Balmoral 😔 pic.twitter.com/OlZXDOBK5q
— Rachel Clarke (@doctor_oxford) September 8, 2022
In terms of gossip, Meghan Markle was not invited to join Harry when he visited the Queen on her deathbed, so, yeah, Elizabeth’s death is probably not going to mend any familial fences anytime soon.
Only tangentially related, the BBC has donated £1.42 million ($1.6 million) to charities to make amends for that Princess Diana interview.
So I was going to spend most of today talking about the new The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power series since it premiered a week ago, but then this post got hijacked.
But we can cover a few things: like, for instance, the Prime Video series premiered to some 25 million viewers.
And between the whole fantasy thing and the fact that they’re coming out at the same time, there are inevitable comparisons to House of the Dragon. Here, the New York Times says that the two shows probably shouldn’t be compared, and then goes on to do exactly that, judging who has the best dragons, swords, pop culture cred, etc. (Y’all know we can watch both, right?)
The Wrap has some helpful guides to The Lord of the Rings universe if you don’t happen to have a nerd for a husband who is willing to share all of his knowledge memorized in middle school:
- What’s the deal with Sauron?
- Who’s Morgoth?
- What’s the difference between a Hobbit and a Harfoot?
- Who are all these characters?
The gist of the racist complaint is that supposedly Tolkien wrote The Lord of the Rings epic as a sort of alternative history of the Brits and Europeans, and therefore, no characters should be people of color. I mean, there have been people of color in what is now the United Kingdom since at least the Romans, but do go on.
And then there will always be men who turn into screaming babies when women are centered as heroes (see: Star Wars and all the recent Marvel films that featured female heroines). Such a fragile thing, masculinity.
In any event, Prime Video put into place a 72-hour moratorium on reviews on all of its series this summer ahead of The Rings of Power’s premiere anticipating that there would be a troll backlash. They weren’t wrong.
The show, and some familiar Hobbits demonstrated their solidarity with the diverse cast:
You Are All Welcome Here @LOTRonPrime @DonMarshall72 #RingsOfPower https://t.co/8txOhlHa2f pic.twitter.com/nWytILT0zG
— Elijah Wood (@elijahwood) September 7, 2022
We stand in solidarity with our cast. #YouAreAllWelcomeHere pic.twitter.com/HLIQdyqLmr
— The Lord of the Rings on Prime (@LOTRonPrime) September 7, 2022
You can get your own shirt here: 50% of the proceeds will go to charities that benfit people of color.
YOU GUYS, NEIL GAIMAN HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE LORD OF THE RINGS. If you’re going to yell at Neil about “wokeness” and ruining a franchise, yell at him about The Sandman, you idiots.
Elon Musk said a dumb (racist) thing on Twitter about The Rings of Power, and Gaiman responded, and then all stupidity broke loose:
Elon Musk doesn't come to me for advice on how to fail to buy Twitter, and I don't go to him for film, TV or literature criticism. https://t.co/WpyXhQlqIh
— Neil Gaiman (@neilhimself) September 6, 2022
I'm so sorry. I have taken your hurt to heart and promise that I will no longer make any Lord of the Rings based television for any network ever. https://t.co/pZrFFuwjHh
— Neil Gaiman (@neilhimself) September 8, 2022
I'm doing my best but, you know, making all that Lord of the Rings stuff is hard. Er. https://t.co/LouXB0h5AL
— Neil Gaiman (@neilhimself) September 6, 2022
None. I’ve watched the first two episodes and enjoyed them. Apart from that I just made the mistake of answering a question when someone tagged me. https://t.co/1yacwyLGXn
— Neil Gaiman (@neilhimself) September 6, 2022
If you’re going to criticize the way Neil wrote LOTR you’ll have to go through me first. YOU SHALL NOT PASS! #IHaveNotYetBegunToFight https://t.co/oEPYSOrZ0w
— michael sheen 💙 (@michaelsheen) September 8, 2022
Will he also defend your writing of Transformers? The Star Wars sequels? What of your butchery of Grimm’s source material of your 1937 animated version of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves? Stop writing all the things, Neil. Give us blessed silence and nothing to pass the time.
— Helena Bell (@HelBell) September 9, 2022
BREAKING: NEIL GAIMAN DISAVOWS HIS SINGULAR INVOLVEMENT IN WRITING THE LORD OF THE RINGS BOOK, MOVIE AND TV SERIES; UNCLEAR IF HE WILL ABANDON OWNERSHIP OVER NEIL GAIMAN'S STAR WARS, NEIL GAIMAN'S GAME OF THRONES, OR NEIL GAIMAN'S THE EPIC OF GILGAMESH https://t.co/xRpvYu8hyp
— Chuck Wendig (@ChuckWendig) September 9, 2022
If you or a loved one had a show ruined by author Neil Gaiman, you may be entitled to financial compensation. https://t.co/HTSvYdwvIN
— Natural One Crafts !!COMMISSIONS ARE OPEN!! (@Natural1Crafts) September 8, 2022
Now … I don’t know who is interested in House of the Dragon and simultaneously doesn’t have either HBO or HBO Max, but if you are in the middle of that Venn diagram for some reason, you can now watch the entire first episode on YouTube for free.
HOLD UP. WAS FLORENCE PUGH SUPPOSED TO MAKE AN APPEARANCE IN TED LASSO? MY HEAD IS GOING TO EXPLODE FROM ALL THIS DON’T WORRY, DARLING MESS I SWEAR TO GOD.
i wish they kept florence pughs cameo in ted lasso just to add another layer to all the drama happening rn pic.twitter.com/HceCVV24hu
— ezra (@weltonsboys) September 6, 2022
Speaking of soccer football, if you’re not familiar with how the Premiere League works because your husband is not completely obsessed with a team that he just picked out of the sky, here’s a quick overview while you enjoy Welcome to Wrexham.
What the hell is going on over at Law & Order: Organized Crime, guys?
Regis Philbin had a special gold McDonald’s card that entitled him to free McDonald’s for life, but it mostly served to just confuse cashiers.
(I have an interesting behind the scenes story about COVID insurance and productions but I’m not sure how much I can actually say. Let’s blind item this — a certain very big sci-fi film’s director insisted that the movie’s VERY famous actors perform an extremely dangerous stunt themselves and not rely on CGI. This director INSISTED it be practical effects, even though it genuinely put these actors in mortal danger, and the actors were like, “We wanna do it! Tom Cruise does all of his own stunts!” The studio reluctantly agreed, and took out a HUGE catastrophic insurance policy on the entire production, lest one — or both — of these VERY FAMOUS actors not survive the stunt.
Later, the entire production had to be shut down by COVID, but fortunately for the movie, this particular insurance policy that covered this dangerous stunt also apparently covered unprecedented global pandemics. It would have been shut down otherwise, because the costs of pausing production were just that high. Instead, it became one of the first productions to resume, and they actually helped design the protocols that would become the standard in the industry. I suppose if they could go back in time, The Morning Show should involve more stunts?)
Renewals
- The Handmaid’s Tale has been renewed for a sixth and final season on Hulu.
In Development
- An untitled Muslim-American comedy is being developed at ABC.
- #I Am Seth Rich, a limited series about the life and murder of Seth Rich, is being developed at Sony Pictures Television.
- Desperate Hours and A Rose for Her Grave are being developed into TV movies at Lifetime.
- Death For Hire: The Origin of Tehk City is being developed as an animated series and graphic novel and Ice-T, Dr. Dre, and Arabian Prince are all involved.
- Cattywumpus, an animated film from Gore Verbinski that had been being developed at Netflix, is now being shopped around.
- All the Beauty and the Bloodshed, a documentary, has been acquired at HBO.
- Stolen is being adapted into a film at Netflix.
- House of Ninjas has been greenlit at Netflix.
- A Small If is being adapted into a limited series.
- Home to Roost, a reality series about The Osbournes moving back to the U.K., is coming to BBC.
Casting News
- Rufus Kampa, Ed McVey, and Meg Bellamy have been cast as Prince William and Kate Middleton in The Crown on Netflix.
- Taran Killam is going to host The NFL Pile On Presented By Carnival Cruise Line on Prime Video.
- Carol Kane has joined the cast of Star Trek: Strange New Worlds and Billy Campbell has joined the voice cast of Star Trek: Prodigy on Paramount+.
- Michael Mando will join the cast of Sinking Spring on Apple TV+.
- Anna Konkle will star in Western on Prime Video.
- Kathryn Prescott is joining the cast of New Amsterdam on NBC.
- Bridget Regan is joining the cast of The Winchesters on The CW.
- Shakira Barrera is joining Ironheart on Disney+.
- Amiah Miller and Bill Heck have joined the cast of Dust on Hulu.
- Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje and Mustafa Shakir will co-star in King Shaka on Showtime. Terry Pheto and Lerato Mvelase are also joining the cast.
- Linda Emond, Jayne Atkinson, Jack Cutmore-Scott, and Lisa Lu have joined the cast of Career Opportunities in Murder and Mayhem on Hulu.
- Darren Mann, Michelle Randolph, James Badge Dale, Marley Shelton, Brian Geraghty, Aminah Nieves, and Julia Schlaepfer have joined the cast of 1923 on Paramount+.
- Melvin Robert has joined Extra as a co-host.
Mark Your Calendar
- The Watcher will premiere on Netflix soon. It is not a comedy, but this trailer is comedic genius.
- Quantum Leap will premiere on NBC on September 19.
- Interview with a Vampire will debut on AMC on October 2.
- The Peripheral is debuting on Prime Video on October 23.
- Star Trek: Picard returns on Paramount+ on February 16.
- Star Trek: Prodigy will debut on Paramount+ on October 27.
- Star Trek: Strange New Worlds returns on Paramount+ in 2023.
- The Trapped 13: How We Survived The Thai Cave will debut on Netflix on October 5.
- Horsepower will debut on Prime Video on September 23.
- The Very VERY Best of the 80s will premiere on AXS on October 4.
- Messyness returns on MTV on September 15.
- Ink Master will return on Paramount+ on September 17.
- BASTARD!! -Heavy Metal, Dark Fantasy returns on Netflix on September 15.
- Doll House will debut on Netflix soon.
- Hellraiser will premiere on Hulu on October 7.
- The Visitor will debut on Epix in December.
- The Big Brunch will premiere on HBO Max on November 10.
- Alaskan Bush People will return on Discovery and Discovery+ on October 2.
- Rachael Ray returns on September 15.
- Oprah and Viola The Woman King will air on OWN on September 13.
- The Rich Eisen Show launches on Roku on September 12.
- Freeform has announced their “31 Nights of Halloween” dates.
- Hallmark Channel and Hallmark Movies & Mysteries has announced their fall slate. Find movies and dates here.
WATCH THIS
FRIDAY
Cobra Kai: Season five premiere. Netflix
End of the Road: Queen Latifah stars in this thriller as a single mom who has to protect her family when a murder and a missing bag of cash puts them in danger on a road trip. Premiere. Netflix
Capital One Bowl: The first qualifying rounds pit Texas against Oklahoma. Season premiere. 7 p.m., NBC
A Fireside Chat with Megan Thee Stallion: Megan is kinda having a moment, between this, She-Hulk and Gutsy. Props to her PR team. 7 p.m., BET Her
SATURDAY
Moonfall: This is that very real movie about the moon crashing into Earth, in case you forgot this happened. Premiere. 7 p.m., HBO
Husband, Wife and Their Lover: A couple decides to bring a third into their bedroom to spice up their love life and things go wrong. Well, it is a Lifetime movie, so what did they expect? Premiere. 5 p.m., Lifetime
Creative Arts Emmy Awards: Nerd awards. 7 p.m., FXX
SUNDAY
Monarch: The network fall season officially begins with the premiere of this country music soap opera starring Susan Sarandon. Series premiere. 7 p.m., Fox
American Gigolo: Jon Bernthal stars in this adaptation of the Richard Gere thriller. Series premiere. 8 p.m., Showtime
Serpent Queen: Queen Catherine de Medici of France tells her tale in this new period drama. Series premiere. 7 p.m., Starz
Late Night:
-
- Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon (Friday): John Legend, Danielle Brooks
- Jimmy Kimmel Live!: (Friday): Kenan Thompson, Joe Buck, Yungblud
FRI. | 7:00 | 7:30 | 8:00 | 8:30 | 9:00 | 9:30 |
ABC | Shark Tank (repeat) |
20/20 |
CBS | Secret Celebrity Renovation (new) |
Blue Bloods (repeat) |
Blue Bloods (repeat) |
CW | Killer Camp (new) |
Dynasty (new) |
Local |
FOX | Friday Night Smackdown | Local |
NBC | Capital One College Bowl (new) |
Capital One College Bowl (new) |
Dateline |
—
SAT. | 7:00 | 7:30 | 8:00 | 8:30 | 9:00 | 9:30 | 10:00 | 10:30 | 11:00 | 11:30 |
ABC | College Football (live) |
News/Local |
CBS | NCIS: Hawai’i (repeat) |
FBI: International (repeat) |
48 Hours | News/Local |
CW | College Football (live) |
Local |
FOX | MLB Baseball (live) |
News/Local |
NBC | America’s Got Talent (repeat) |
Dateline (new) |
News/ Local |
Saturday Night Live (repeat) |
—
SUN. | 6:00 | 6:30 | 7:00 | 7:30 | 8:00 | 8:30 | 9:00 | 9:30 |
ABC | America’s Funniest Home Videos (repeat) |
Celebrity Family Feud (new) |
The $100,000 Pyramid (new) |
The Final Straw (new) |
CBS | 60 Minutes | Big Brother (new) |
The Equalizer (repeat) |
NCIS: Los Angeles (repeat) |
The CW | Local | World’s Funniest Animals (repeat) |
World’s Funniest Animals (repeat) |
Penn & Teller: Fool Us (repeat) |
Local |
FOX | The OT (repeat) |
Monarch (new) |
Monarch (new) |
Local/News |
NBC | Sunday Night Football (live) |