The Republican National Convention is underway. Let the onslaught of bullshit begin!

It’s Monday and it’s almost September. Just one more week of this August nightmare to get through.

And for those of us in Texas, we are 50 DAYS away from Early Voting. YEE-FUCKING-HAW.

Political Crap

The Trump Republican National Convention is in full swing (with help from former Apprentice producers, natch) as I type this, and have formally nominated their Grifter God their candidate during their roll call today.

This about sums it up:

Oh, and also, they’re not laying out an actual platform this year. Their platform is literally, “Whatever President Dictator Wants.”

And because he has to absorb all the oxygen, President Spray Tan Smear has already addressed the convention in a long, rambling — calling it a speech would be inaccurate … pack of lies. Let’s call it a collection of ridiculous lies that CNN turned away from halfway through because he was spreading so much disinformation about voting by mail. I’m not going to repeat his bullshit here because NO.

But if you missed today’s spewage, don’t worry. President Nazi Rally plans on addressing the convention every single day. Because OBVIOUSLY he does.

The convention is beginning in the shadow of a few remarkable events:

“What has he read?” Mary Trump asked her aunt.

“No. He doesn’t read,” Barry responded.

“Donald is out for Donald, period,” Barry said.

Mary questioned Barry about what he had accomplished on his own.

“I don’t know,” Barry said.

“Nothing,” Mary responded.

“Well he has five bankruptcies,” Barry said. (Trump’s companies filed for six corporate bankruptcies but he has never declared personal bankruptcy.)

“Good point. He did accomplish those all by his self,” Mary said.

“Yes, he did. Yes, he did. You can’t trust him,” Barry said.

Maryanne said on another occasion that her brother kept asking about Fox News. One day, Barry said, the president called her and said, “Did you watch Fox News?”

“No,” Barry said she told the president.

“Why not?” he said.

“I don’t watch much television at all,” Barry said she responded.

“What do you do?” the president asked.

“I read,” Barry replied.

“What do you read?” the president said.

“Books,” Barry said.

The president was incredulous. “You don’t watch Fox?”

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popcorn happy getting good

Also, last week, Miles Taylor, the former chief of staff to then-Homeland Security Secretary Kirstjen Nielsen, came forward with this damning statement of support for Joe Biden:

Taylor has since given interviews where “he told George Stephanopoulos that Trump wanted to hold off emergency aid to California in 2018, then going through devastating wildfires. The reason: the state’s governor, Jerry Brown, and later Gavin Newsom, ‘did not support him.'”

“As wildfires were burning down houses in the state, the president basically said to us, ‘I don’t care. These people haven’t done enough to deserve it. Cut off the money.’”

And to MSNBC, Taylor revealed that President White Nationalist didn’t want to just buy Greenland, he wanted to try to “trade” it for Puerto Rico because “Puerto Rico was dirty and the people were poor.”

No fucking words.

#Unfit will be available on VOD on September 1, and I, for one, will be watching:

Going Viral

In Australia, The Masked Singer and Millionaire’s Hotseat had to shut down production after crew tested positive.

But Carnival Row was able to complete production in the Czech Republic.

Real Time With Bill Maher will return to the studio this week.

Sounds like Station 19 is going to take on both the pandemic and Black Lives Matter.

The Hills: New Beginnings might make the cast members live together and film in a quarantine bubble. DRAMA.

Frank Cullotta, Mobster who served as a consultant on the film Casino, died from COVID-19.

The Kentucky Derby, which will run on September 5, will not have any fans in attendance after all.

Major League Baseball had to cancel another series after two Mets tested positive.

A French nudist colony had a surge in COVID cases, and is now testing around 30% positivity. HUH. IT’S A MYSTERY!

All Other TV News

Interesting: Neil Gaiman has revealed that the Sandman adaptation at Netflix is going to be set in the present, and not in the 80s when it was originally published, so as to not be  a “period piece.”

The Haunting of Bly Manor will debut this fall (check down below for some first look photos). Here are five things to know about this season.

So, Jeremy Strong, the actor who plays Kendall on Succession sounds … intense.

Sophie Turner has the Stark throne in her home and I’ve never been more jealous.

The fates of the Love Island couples, in the event you just HAD to know.

Some X-Files fan wrote lyrics to The X-Files‘ theme song and the cast sing it? Poorly? Like REALLY poorly? to raise money. Watch if you dare:

Lori Loughlin is going to jail for two months for the college admissions scandal. Bye, Aunt Becky.

And Joseph DeAngelo, the Golden State Killer, and subject of I’ll Be Gone in the Dark, received 26 life sentences without parole. Honestly, the death sentence would be too good for this fucking monster.

Cancellations

In Development

Casting News

  • Alison Sweeney is returning to Days of Our Lives.
  • James McAvoy will narrate Channel 4’s reality competition series, The Bridge.

Mark Your Calendar

  • The Comey Rule will premiere on Showtime on September 27.
  • Zack Snyder’s Justice League will be released in four one-hour segments on HBO Max in 2021.
  • Raised by Wolves will debut on HBO Max on September 3.
  • The Flash will return on The CW in January.
  • Cobra Kai will premiere on Netflix next year.
  • Anthony will premiere on Peacock on September 4.
  • The Sit-In: Harry Belafonte Hosts the Tonight Show will premiere on Peacock on September 10.
  • Black Boys will premiere on Peacock on September 10.
  • A Most Beautiful Thing will premiere on Peacock on September 4.
  • The Public will debut on Peacock on September 15.
  • Kiss the Ground will debut on Netflix on September 22.

View this post on Instagram

I have been chomping at the bit to show you this! Having the HONOR of being in this film and being an Executive Producer has changed me forever… Here is the trailer to our film @kissthegroundmovie It took Josh and Rebecca Tickell 7 years to make this film with our extraordinary team. I shot the 1st footage with Geoff Shotz 9 YEARS AGO in Africa filming Allan Savory! EVERYONE. This film is the greatest work of my lifetime and my greatest accomplishment (other than being born and having kids of course) I’ve never been more proud of anything in my life. Ever. You’ll see why. This is a simple solution to literally stop climate change in its tracks. Please WATCH this. Please SHARE this. NOW. This film will change the world and our lives. Thank you to our team and thank you @gisele @tombrady @woodyharrelson @rosariodawson @jason_mraz @davidarquette and this ENTIRE TEAM of dedicated world-changing talents! The movement starts with the film and @kisstheground . Let’s do this TOGETHER! Follow, share and let’s shape our bright future! SOUND ON! GET INSPIRED! WE WORKED SO HARD! Share share share! The film launches SEPTEMBER 22nd on @netflix !!!! Love, Ian

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R.I.P.

Jack Tewksbury, Journalist and Hollywood Foreign Press Association member

Justin Townes Earle, Singer-songwriter, and son of musician Steve Earle

Frankie Banali, Quiet Riot drummer

Walter Lure, Co-founder of the punk band, the Heartbreakers

Jack Sherman, Original guitarist for Red Hot Chili Peppers

WATCH THIS

Republican National Convention: Presidential nomination by delegates 7 p.m., PBS, CNN, MSNBC, FOX News 9 p.m., ABC, CBS, NBC

Love Island: By “Island,” they mean a Las Vegas suite. And by “Love,” they mean … well, not love. Season premiere. 7 p.m., CBS

I May Destroy You: Arabella’s memories come back to her in the season finale. 8 p.m., HBO

Late Night:

  • The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: Jon Favreau, Jon Lovett, Tommy Vietor, Tim McGraw, Laura Benanti
  • The Late Late Show with James Corden: Maisie Williams, Bright Eyes
  • Jimmy Kimmel Live: Dan Levy, Elle King, guest host David Spade
  • The Daily Show: The Daily Social Distancing Show

 

MON. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC Holey Moley II: The Sequel!
(repeat)
To Tell the Truth
(repeat)
Republican National Convention
CBS Love Island
(new)
Republican National Convention
CW Whose Line is it Anyway?
(new)
Whose Line is it Anyway?
(repeat)
Penn & Teller: Try This At Home Too
(new)
Local
FOX The King’s Speech News/Local
NBC American Ninja Warrior
(repeat)
Republican National Convention

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