It’s another Friday. Our country is being torn apart by a lunatic who is desperate to flare up culture wars so we won’t talk about his failures at containing a pandemic that is racing through our country or the fact that the Russians are putting bounties on our soldiers’ heads and he did nothing about it (remember that?) or that the Supreme Court is making him hand over his mysterious tax returns. Our states (or at least MY state) desperate to suck up to said lunatic are demanding that we send our children into schools in a month so as to more effectively distribute coronavirus to our teachers, administrators, staffers, parents, and grandparents. The death toll is surging back to April numbers and 136,000 Americans are dead (and at the current rate, we’ll hit 150,000 in about two weeks) and we are running out of morgue space, but hey! The President claims he passed a cognitive test at some point, surprising even the doctors!
How to cognitive pic.twitter.com/YM51OJ58qA
— Sarah Cooper (@sarahcpr) July 10, 2020
I’M JUST GOING TO SPEND THE WEEKEND SCREAMING INTO THE HEATWAVE, CHECK BACK WITH ME ON MONDAY.
The networks are already accusing Nielsen of screwing them over in the fall. It’s a very specific issue: basically, networks are mad that Nielsen refuses to count “out-of-home” viewing in their overall numbers: those people who might have watched a show in a hotel, someone else’s home, at a bar … wherever. Nielsen is like, “I mean, OK, but everyone is staying home because of COVID, so why would we bother?” But especially BECAUSE of the pandemic, the networks are desperate for good numbers as advertisers are pulling way back on spending.
Card Sharks has returned to filming. Good luck, guys!
NBA Countdown presented by Mountain Dew: NBA Restart will premiere on ABC on July 25 and I wish I had made up that title because it is some amazing Idiocracy insanity.
Soooooo: Comic-Con. The convention was set to be held between July 22 – 26 but had to go virtual for now PAINFULLY obvious reasons, but their catastrophe is your windfall, as the convention will be free for anyone to “attend” (read: watch on your computer).
Most of the 300 to 400 panels will be pre-taped, which means no live questions from the fans. However, many shows have been reaching out to fans via social media for questions, so if you want to ask something, you still have a chance. Deadline has been updating a schedule of when panels will be available for those “attending.” You’ll be able to watch any and all of the panels on Comic-con.org once they go live.
The Big Ten conference announced all athletics will be in-conference only. Oh, ok. Good luck with THAT.
Sam Raimi and Rob Zombie are working on a contained horror film together so that’s pretty rad.
Dr. Fauci says you haven’t seen him on the teevees as much anymore because he speaks too much truth, which is inconvenient for this kakistocracy that we are currently saddled with.
Democrats are trying to figure out whether or not it’s safe to have smaller satellite conventions all over the country, rather than one big centralized one (prolly not but whaddya gonna do?); meanwhile, even Republican bigwigs are balking at attending the GOP convention in Jacksonville and who can possibly blame them?
For the 1/100th time, the reason we show so many Cases, compared to other countries that haven’t done nearly as well as we have, is that our TESTING is much bigger and better. We have tested 40,000,000 people. If we did 20,000,000 instead, Cases would be half, etc. NOT REPORTED!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) July 9, 2020
- THIS IS NOT HOW EITHER MATH OR SCIENCE WORKS.
- 1/100th? I don’t know, maybe it’s time for another one of those cognitive tests, dude.
As for today, President Babadook is threatening our kids, their schools, and our election:
Now that we have witnessed it on a large scale basis, and firsthand, Virtual Learning has proven to be TERRIBLE compared to In School, or On Campus, Learning. Not even close! Schools must be open in the Fall. If not open, why would the Federal Government give Funding? It won’t!!!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) July 10, 2020
… and/or Funding, which will be taken away if this Propaganda or Act Against Public Policy continues. Our children must be Educated, not Indoctrinated!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) July 10, 2020
….Absentee Ballots are fine because you have to go through a precise process to get your voting privilege. Not so with Mail-Ins. Rigged Election!!! 20% fraudulent ballots?
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) July 10, 2020
So, you know. It’s a day that ends in “y.”
Obviously, OBVIOUSLY all of these grifters gobbled up as much PPP moneys they could. And the Catholic Church took in $1.4 BILLION? Sure. Of course they did.
Black Lives Matter
This is a long, interesting piece about whether or not pulling down instances of racism in old series is enough or even a good idea. Fascinatingly, although it really shouldn’t have surprised me, in rebranding Splash Mountain, changing it from a Song of the South ride to a Princess and the Frog ride, Disney never explained why they were removing the Song of the South references.
And if you’re not watching Dear White People, or other Black stories, here’s why you should be: it’s called the “racial empathy gap,” and it’s time to end it.
- “Spend the money” and hire a professional on equity and diversity.
- Do your own personal work to understand racism.
- Hear from new voices and “listen to believe.”
- Interrupt bias when you see it; “This is not the time to be a bystander.”
I can’t believe I ever stepped foot in Kelly’s house and shared a meal with her. It’s actually really hurtful to see her true colors. I had no idea while I played for ATL she felt this way. Happy to own us as long as we stay quiet and perform 🤬👀 https://t.co/97jTbmuHda
— Layshia Clarendon (@Layshiac) July 7, 2020
Dear @SenatorLoeffler ….
I’m pretty sad to see that my team ownership is not supportive of the movement & all that it stands for. I was already sitting out this season & this is an example of why. I would love to have a conversation with you about the matter if you’re down?
— Renee Montgomery (@itsreneem_) July 7, 2020
All Other TV News
Just when I thought I had fully mourned Carl Reiner’s death, along comes this: his last ever performance, along with his son Rob (the original director of Princess Bride) in Quibi’s Princess Bride project. PREPARE TO CRY:
"As you wish." ❤️ In his final performance, Carl Reiner shares a special goodbye with his son Rob as part of the fan-film version of The Princess Bride: https://t.co/ykEQy1KN5w pic.twitter.com/EgE4djHvRh
— VANITY FAIR (@VanityFair) July 10, 2020
And here is Steve Martin’s heartfelt tribute to Reiner. He was perfect.
According to the critics, these are the best shows of the year. (Watchmen better win errrrrrrrything.)
OK, HAVE YOU BINGED MY MOST RECENT OBSESSION YET: UNSOLVED MYSTERIES? Here are some updates/pieces about the stories featured:
- Fans have some theories about Rey Rivera, that note, and the movie The Game.
- We all think her husband killed Patrice, right?
- People have lots of theories about the Count Xavier Dupont de Ligonnès murders.
- Of the stories, Alonzo Brooks’ murder might be the first one solved, thanks to viewers.
- HOW ABOUT THAT UFO ONE?
- Reminder: Sandy Klemp can still be tried for murder.
In Watchmen, the destruction of Tulsa in the 1921 Massacre = the destruction of Krypton. Brilliant.
Roswell, New Mexico is getting a new showrunner. Carina Adly MacKenzie announced she is leaving the show.
Although the playwright-turned-series creator and showrunner (Katori Hall) tells Variety she “did try to hire men,” during interviews she asked, “What is your definition of the female gaze? And I would say 10 times out of 10, the men did not have an answer to that question.”
“And so, knowing that was my goal, to show this world through the eyes of women, I knew that I really had to pick artists and interview directors who were passionate about that and had already started investigating that gaze within their own work, and so naturally, the hiring practice quickly became all-female,” she explains.
Demi Lovato says the entertainment business gave her an eating disorder. Next, you’ll be telling me that attending a Trump rally gives you stupid and COVID.
I don’t care what the Grammys had to say, “Misbehavin'” was THE song of 2019.
The news about Naya Rivera is not positive. My heart goes out to her family and friends.
- Better Things has been renewed at FX for a fifth season.
- Ramy has been renewed at Hulu for a third season.
- An untitled spinoff of the upcoming movie The Batman, set in the Gotham City police department, is being developed at HBO Max.
- Tether, a supernatural drama, is in development at Amazon.
- Chinos, an animated series by Eddie Huang, has been bought by HBO Max.
- La Bravura, a thriller drama is in the works at Showtime.
- Shell, a satirical horror, is in the works at HBO Max.
- Tomie is being adapted at Quibi.
- Ravenswood Manor, a camp horror soap, is in development.
- ESPN and Jimmy Kimmel are producing a 30 for 30 on the 1986 Mets.
- Class Action Park has been bought by HBO Max.
- Get Real, a documentary about reality TV, has been bought by Quibi.
- Gone for Good, another Harlan Coben adaptation is in the works at Netflix.
- Cate Blanchett has signed a first-look deal with FX.
- Matt Reeves has signed an overall deal with Warner Brothers Television.
- The Maurice Sendak Foundation has signed an overall deal with Apple.
- Netflix is developing the international series Soil and Nexiko.
- The Union of European Football Associations (UEFA) Champions League will be broadcast on CBS All Access.
- Oscar Isaac and Michelle Williams are going to star in a six-episode adaptation of Scenes from a Marriage on HBO.
- Aya Cash is joining the cast of the Fox comedy pilot This Country.
- Lucy Liu has been cast as the lead in the ABC pilot Bossy. (Working title.)
Mark Your Calendar
- Woke will debut on Hulu on September 9 and it has strong Sorry to Bother You vibes. Also, it’s great to see the charming Lamorne Morris in something again. Give this man more work!
- Street Food will return on Netflix on July 21. This is a wonderful, humanizing series, and I highly recommend checking out the first season which is about Asia.
- Rogue Trip will debut on Disney+ on July 24.
- Jim Gaffigan: The Pale Tourist will debut on Amazon on July 24.
- Jack Whitehall: I’m Only Joking will premiere on Netflix on July 21.
- Tig N’ Seek will debut on HBO Max on July 23.
Transformers: War For Cybertron Trilogy will debut on Netflix on July 30.
- Power Book II: Ghost will premiere on Starz in September.
- Martha Knows Best will premiere on HGTV on July 31.
- Tiger will debut on HBO on December 20.
- Tyler Perry’s Madea’s Farewell Play will premiere on BET+ on August 27.
- Cake My Day will debut on Nickelodeon on July 17.
- Stockton on My Mind will premiere on HBO on July 28.
- Infinity Train will premiere on HBO Max this summer.
- Hulu announced the premiere dates of five British series: Jamie: Keep Cooking and Carry On on July 27; Maxxx on July 28; Ladhood on July 29; In My Skin on July 30; Brassic on July 31.
- True and the Rainbow Kingdom will premiere on Discovery Family on August 2.
- The Larva Island Movie will premiere on Netflix on July 23.
- The Osbournes Want to Believe will premiere on Travel Channel on August 2.
- The Baby Factory: Alabama will debut on Lifetime on July 15; Happily Ever Altered will debut on July 22.
Brandis Kemp, aka Sally Blankfield, Actress known for Fridays and AfterM*A*S*H
Alan Donnes, Comedian, producer, writer, and former head of National Lampoon
Ronald Schwary, Oscar-winning producer
Palm Springs: OK, Groundhog Day, but what if Andie MacDowell was also experiencing what Bill Murray was is the concept of this movie starring Andy Samberg and Cristin Milioti. Premiere. Hulu
Greyhound: Tom Hanks stars in this World War II drama about Captain Ernest Krause, who led an international convoy of supplies to Allied forces. Premiere. Apple TV+
Home Movie: The Princess Bride: It’s the scene-by-scene remake of The Princess Bride by bored celebrities that everyone is so bent out of shape about. Series premiere. Quibi
The Old Guard: Charlize Theron stars in this film about a team of immortal mercenaries. Premiere. Netflix
Little Voice: Sara Bareilles and J.J. Abrams produced this musical romantic comedy. Series premiere. Apple TV+
Greatness Code: Great athletes discuss what makes them great. Great. Premiere. Apple TV+
Down to Earth With Zac Efron: Zac Efron does a travel show. Sure, why not. Series premiere. Netflix
Hotel Paranormal: It’s another ghost show, but this time it’s 1. about hotels and 2. narrated by Dan Akroyd who is a true believer. Series premiere. 9 p.m., Travel
Crikey! It’s the Irwins: Life in Lockdown: More COVID TV. 8 p.m., Animal Planet
My Cat From Hell: Cat Sh#t Crazy: The cat dude with the goatee and piercings is back to help people deal with their COVID cat situations. I really need real TV to come back. 9 p.m., Animal Planet
P-Valley: This new drama follows the complicated lives of strippers in the Mississippi Delta. Series premiere. 8 p.m., Starz
Snowpiercer: Layton struggles to govern the survivors in the season finale. 9 p.m., TNT
Hightown: Season finale. 7 p.m., Starz
- Watch What Happens Live (Sunday): Imani Walker, Britten Cole
|CW||Masters of Illusion
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|FOX||Friday Night Smackdown||Local|
|ABC||AFV: America This is You!
|The Good Doctor
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|Bless the Harts
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