Wait, is this the beginning of week 9? I think this is week 9, you guys. In any event, it is definitely a Monday and we are somehow nearing mid-May? HOW?
You know what, don’t ask questions, just enjoy:
The greatest of all tweets : pic.twitter.com/wZeYhOtZE2
— Tracy-Ann Oberman (@TracyAnnO) May 9, 2020
As I’ve mentioned about 67 times already, this was supposed to be the week the networks would host their Upfronts, flashy events designed to inspire excitement in their fall lineups and new shows, and convince advertisers to buy commercial time on their networks. That’s not happening for obvious reasons. But the networks still have to put their goods out there somehow, and Fox just released their upcoming fall schedule.
Now, the reason I’m discussing that here in my block of virus-related news is that it is clear the pandemic has shaped how Fox — and presumably the other networks — will be managing their schedules in the midst of an uncertain time. It’s difficult enough that the networks weren’t able to film pilots and buy new shows this spring, how on earth can they plan what they will air in the fall when they have no idea when they will be able to start filming again?
So let’s look at Fox’s fall schedule for a few ideas — new shows are in bold:
7-8 p.m.: L.A.’s Finest
8-9 p.m.: Next
7-8 p.m.: Cosmos: Possible Worlds
8-9 p.m.: Filthy Rich
7-8 p.m.: The Masked Singer
8-9 p.m.: MasterChef Junior
6:30-7 p.m.: Fox NFL Thursday
7-7:19 p.m.: Kickoff Show
7:20 p.m.: Thursday Night Football
7-9 p.m.: WWE’s Friday Night Smackdown
6-9:30 p.m.: Fox Sports Saturday
6-6:30 p.m.: NFL on Fox
6:30-7 p.m.: The OT / Fox Encores
7-7:30 p.m.: The Simpsons
7:30-8 p.m.: Bless the Harts
8-8:30 p.m.: Bob’s Burgers
8:30-9 p.m.: Family Guy
Some important notes: as you can see, there are only three new series on the fall schedule: L.A.’s Finest, neXt and Filthy Rich. What is notable about these three series is that they have already been filmed. L.A.’s Finest is already in its second season in Canada, and neXt and Filthy Rich were filmed as mid-season series for this season, only to have Fox hold them back when it became evident production was going to grind to a halt this spring.
As for the other series, the animated shows are able to be made under social distancing protocols, and Cosmos: Possible Worlds has already aired on Nat Geo.
Where it becomes stickier is with The Masked Singer and MasterChef Junior and the sports programming. As far as I know, they have not filmed either of the reality shows, but you’ll note that there are no premiere dates released, either. This suggests they are taking a wait and see approach with both, knowing that reality shows don’t take as much time to produce and film, they are hoping that production can get underway possibly late this summer. As for the sports programming, I think the approach here is everyone crossing their fingers and praying that NFL Football in particular returns on schedule. God save us all if they have to delay NFL Football. This country will never survive it.
What is interesting about this is that the other networks are in a much more difficult position: the big three, ABC, CBS and NBC have a third as much more programming time to fill than Fox (they broadcast for three hours in primetime, Fox and The CW, only two hours), and none of them have an entire night devoted to animation, the way Fox does. It will be interesting to see what they come up with, but it should be noted that if things become dire, they all have backup sources of programming they could possibly rely on if they become desperate enough to water-down the value of their streaming services: ABC has Disney+; CBS has CBS All Access; and NBC has Peacock. Let me be clear: I have not read anything that suggests CBS is contemplating broadcasting The Good Fight or Star Trek: Picard, or that The Mandalorian will be broadcast on ABC, but it seems like an answer that is just lying there if things become particularly bleak.
Just a thought.
So, the virus is just running rampant in the White House: Ivanka’s personal assistant has it; Mike Pence’s press secretary who also happens to be the unfortunate Mrs. Stephen Miller has it; and as noted last week, one of President Denials’ personal valets has it. Also, too, 11 Secret Service agents have it. Fun!
And here’s the point to be made about it: The White House is the best-protected space in the country: they have access to as many tests as they need; they presumably have the best sanitation available to them; they have everything they could possibly need to keep this virus out if it was possible to keep the virus out. And yet, it’s everywhere inside the White House. So how the hell are businesses who do not have any of the same capabilities supposed to safely open? Such bullshit.
As a result of all these White House folks testing positive, the White House COVID-19 task force, including Dr. Fauci, are self-isolating for a while. Vice President Powdered Milk stayed home this weekend but was back in the White House today. So they’re definitely taking this seriously.
Yep, definitely taking it seriously:
— The White House (@WhiteHouse) May 9, 2020
Asked why President Trump didn’t wear a mask while honoring WW II veterans in their 90s—just a day after one of his personal valets tested positive for COVID-19—press secretary Kayleigh McEnany said, “They made the choice to come here” https://t.co/UTLLh3i9kH pic.twitter.com/fZmUWdPu1m
— Forbes (@Forbes) May 8, 2020
Predictably President 125 Tweets in one day knew exactly who to blame. THANKS, OBAMA.
We are getting great marks for the handling of the CoronaVirus pandemic, especially the very early BAN of people from China, the infectious source, entering the USA. Compare that to the Obama/Sleepy Joe disaster known as H1N1 Swine Flu. Poor marks, bad polls – didn’t have a clue!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) May 10, 2020
And you know what? The media SHOULD compare President Obama’s handling of H1N1 to how President Science Denier has handled COVID-19, because they’ll find that between April 2009 and April 2010, the United States lost 12,469 Americans to H1N1, which is tragic. However, it is a drop in the fucking bucket compared to the 81,173 we have lost to COVID-19 since March. So, you know, shut the fuck up, you fucking moron.
“What we’re fighting against is these long-term trends in which being selfish, being tribal, being divided, and seeing others as an enemy — that has become a stronger impulse in American life,” Obama said in the 30-minute recording. “And by the way, we’re seeing that internationally as well. It’s part of the reason why the response to this global crisis has been so anemic and spotty.”
“It would have been bad even with the best of governments. It has been an absolute chaotic disaster when that mindset — of ‘what’s in it for me’ and ‘to heck with everybody else’ — when that mindset is operationalized in our government,” he said.
THIS. EXACTLY THIS. COME BACK TO US, BARRY.
Roy Horn, of the legendary Siegfried and Roy, has passed away from COVID-19.
UFC fighter Jacare Souza has tested positive.
We all knew it was going to come to this:
San Diego’s Comic-Con will be an At-Home event this year:
— San Diego Comic-Con (@Comic_Con) May 8, 2020
Cannes will announce an official selection of movies, but there will be no physical festival this year.
A24 has delayed the release of The Green Knight which looks creepy and good. Trailer at the link. Over at Marvel, however, they are still counting on a theatrical release of The New Mutants despite teasing fans with an accidental preorder button for VOD on Amazon. The button is gone now.
A couple recreated The Office’s Jim and Pam’s engagement, so John Krasinski not only married them in a surprise ceremony on Zoom, he had the entire cast of The Office recreate the dance they did at Jim and Pam’s wedding and it was very, very sweet. It’s the video above. It all starts at about the 7-minute mark if you want to skip ahead.
Jack Dorsey, Twitter’s CEO, has donated $10 million to Sean Penn’s nonprofit that is providing drive-through testing.
We All Play Our Part, a one-hour fundraiser that will be streamed on Friday on MPTF’s YouTube page will be headlined by George Clooney, Michael Douglas, Hugh Jackman, Allison Janney, Jodie Foster, and Pierce Brosnan.
Seth MacFarlane is going to host The At-Home Variety Show, a daily series on Peacock that will raise money for relief.
The Pretty Little Liars cast is having a virtual reunion to raise relief funds.
IDCON: Home Together will happen on Zoom on the 21st, and raise money for relief efforts.
The Jonas Brothers and Steve Tisch have donated a combined $1 million to relief efforts.
Robert Kraft is auctioning off one of his Super Bowl rings to raise money for charity.
All Other TV News
Will SPOILER return to Westworld? Yes, of course. The only question is how.
We’re inching closer to a Community movie. I’m pretty sure this will happen now that the series is over on Netflix.
I guess people have been using this time to binge old episodes of America’s Next Top Model (and why not), and have noticed that Tyra wasn’t always exactly nice about the contestants’ looks. People started posting about it, specifically about Banks telling one contestant she needed to go to the dentist and close a gap in her teeth, and you guys, Tyra heard you and she’s sorry:
Been seeing the posts about the insensitivity of some past ANTM moments and I agree with you. Looking back, those were some really off choices. Appreciate your honest feedback and am sending so much love and virtual hugs. ❤️
— Tyra Banks (@tyrabanks) May 9, 2020
Of course, she also didn’t need this negative press right now, either, as she was set to open a model-themed theme park called ModelLand right when the pandemic hit.
This is a list of the “craziest” TV shows of all time, including Small Wonder, Manimal, and Cop Rock, but it leaves off a number of contenders, including I Wanna Marry Harry, in which Fox convinced a bunch of dummies that they were on a reality competition show to marry one of the Princes of England since that is definitely a thing he would do; Sex Box, in which people had sex in a box; and Baby Talk, a sitcom in which Tony Danza was the voice of a talking baby.
Ink Master star Daniel Silva is about to be booked for murder.
- American Horror Stories, a spinoff of American Horror Story is in the works.
- Santa Inc., an adult animated comedy voice by Sarah Silverman and Seth Rogan, is coming to HBO Max.
- A spinoff of Younger is in the works at Freeform.
- Call Me Cat is a go at Fox.
- The script for Here Comes The Flood has been bought by Netflix.
- Ricky & Cricket an animated comedy is being developed at Amazon.
- Bill Skarsgard has been cast as Clark Olofsson, one of the bank robbers involved in the robbery that coined the term “Stockholm Syndrome” in the Netflix series about the event.
- Kal Penn has been cast in Clarice on CBS.
- Temuera Morrison will play Boba Fett on The Mandalorian on Disney+.
- Chris Noth is joining the cast of The Equalizer on CBS.
Mark Your Calendar
- 13 Reasons Why will return for its final season on June 5.
- The 100 will return on The CW on May 20.
- The Baby-Sitters’ Club will debut on Netflix on July 3.
- Selling Sunset will return on Netflix on May 22.
- Betaal will debut on Netflix on May 24.
- Bulletproof will return on The CW on June 10.
- Mysteries of the Deep will premiere on Discovery Channel of May 27.
- “Sit, Stay, Dogs All Day,” a five-day marathon of dog programming, will being on Nat Geo WILD on May 18.
- Hallmark announced premiere dates for three movies: Aurora Teagarden Mysteries: Heist and Seek on May 27; Timeless Love on June14; Midway to Love on June 28.
- Impetigore, an Indonesian horror film, is coming to Shudder on July 23.
Jerry Stiller, Legendary comedian, actor, father to Ben, husband to Anne
I’m sad to say that my father, Jerry Stiller, passed away from natural causes. He was a great dad and grandfather, and the most dedicated husband to Anne for about 62 years. He will be greatly missed. Love you Dad. pic.twitter.com/KyoNsJIBz5
— Ben Stiller (@RedHourBen) May 11, 2020
Such sad news that my beloved friend, Jerry Stiller, has passed. He was perhaps the kindest man I ever had the honor to work beside. He made me laugh when I was a child and every day I was with him. A great actor, a great man, a lovely friend. #RIPJerryStiller I Love you.
— jason alexander (@IJasonAlexander) May 11, 2020
Yeah. I adored this man. pic.twitter.com/4YiaTLJh4C
— jason alexander (@IJasonAlexander) May 11, 2020
I was lucky enough to work with Jerry Stiller, playing his daughter for 9 years on The King Of Queens, but even luckier to know him, the man, the husband, the father, the grandfather. I am only
comforted knowing… https://t.co/yHUS1XWyN0
— Leah Remini (@LeahRemini) May 11, 2020
Little Richard, Legendary musician, one of the creators of rock-and-roll and just all-around entertainer
A night to remember little Richard. And the boys peace and love. ✌️🌟❤️🎶🎵🍒☮️ pic.twitter.com/VsRDLTVeeJ
— #RingoStarr (@ringostarrmusic) May 9, 2020
— Mick Jagger (@MickJagger) May 9, 2020
— Patti LaBelle (@MsPattiPatti) May 9, 2020
RIP Little Richard. The man who invented It. Elvis popularized it. Chuck Berry was the storyteller. Richard embodied the Spirit of RocknRoll. Maureen and I were so honored being the first marriage he conducted. Were lucky to know him. He lives forever in the Underground Garage.
— Stevie Van Zandt (@StevieVanZandt) May 9, 2020
Betty Wright, Grammy-winning R&B singer
Andre Harell, Founder of Uptown Records
Leslie A. Pope, Oscar-nominated set decorator
9-1-1: The team rushes to save passengers in a train derailment in the series finale. 7 p.m., Fox
Amy Schumer Learns to Cook: Amy Schumer’s chef husband tries to teach her how to cook during the lockdown. Series premiere. 9 p.m., Food
The Price is Right with RuPaul: RuPaul comes to play. 7 p.m., CBS
Barkitecture: It’s a show about dog houses. I mean, come on. Series premiere. Quibi
Trial by Media: A look at some famous trials that were influenced by the media coverage. Netflix
- Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon: Seth MacFarlane, David Chang, Lady Antebellum
- Late Night with Seth Meyers: Tina Fey
- The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: Jake Tapper, Tame Impala
- The Late Late Show with James Corden: Nicholas Hoult, Lior Suchard, Sam Fischer
- Jimmy Kimmel Live: dam Sandler
- The Daily Show: The Daily Social Distancing Show
- Conan: Ed Helms
- Watch What Happens Live: Dua Lipa, Lena Dunham
|ABC||The Bachelor Presents: Listen to Your Heart
|The Baker and the Beauty
|CBS||The Price is Right
|Bob Hearts Abishola
|CW||Whose Line is it Anyway?
|Whose Line is it Anyway?
|Roswell, New Mexico
|9-1-1: Lone Star