Breaking: Paramount promised President Blood Clot that they’d overhaul CNN in the most obvious story of all time and which we all knew already

by Therese Odell, posted in watch this


Perfect dog, no notes.

 

View on Threads

 

Here’s A BUNCH OF TV News

The Wall Street Journal reported on Monday that Larry Ellison, father of David Ellison, promised President Spray Tan a complete overhaul of CNN to make it friendlier to him if Paramount were allowed to buy Warner Bros. Discovery. The Ellisons just released a statement that amounted to, and I quote, “Nuh-uh!” And we totally believe you!

“When there’s so much propaganda and chaos,” she said, “the artist’s job gets more essential and, frankly, more dangerous. When our government sees artists as the enemy … that’s the start of something truly terrifying. It’s a very small step from here to punishing dissent itself.” Julia Louis-Dreyfus gets it. 

Well, my fellow Texans, what do you think of this ranking of shows set in our home state?

The Dutton Ranch stars aren’t too broken up about the showrunner leaving before the show even premiered.

Another Love Island contestant had to be pulled for using a racial slur.

It sure sounds like Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce are getting married at Madison Square Garden on July 3. I’ll be in the vicinity — I’ll let you know what’s going on.

JD Vance is going on Real Time with Bill Maher, because of course he is.

Heal quickly, Jade.

Renewals

In Development

  • You Deserve to Know, starring Nina Dobrev and Paul Wesley, is in development at Hulu.
  • Dark Shadows is being revived as an animated series at Warner Bros.
  • Jay-Z in 8, an eight-part documentary about Jay-Z and directed by Rick Rubin, is in the works at HBO.
  • Aquamarine has been given a pilot order at Disney+ and Disney Channel, and will guest star Emma Roberts.
  • The Wolf King series of books is being adapted into a TV series at Starz.
  • Katie Robbins has signed an overall deal with 20th Television.

Casting News

Mark Your Calendar

  • Furious will debut on Hulu on July 27.
  • Dancing With the Stars: The Next Pro will debut on ABC on July 13.
  • Ransom Canyon will return on Netflix on July 23.
  • Fightland will premiere on Starz on July 31.
  • Ready or Not 2: Here I Come will premiere on Hulu on July 2.
  • Wardriver will premiere on Paramount+ on July 8.
  • Black + Iconic Soiree will premiere on Paramount+ on June 29.
  • Mary Beth Barone: Galaxy Brain will debut on Netflix on July 28.
  • Breaking Bear will debut on Adult Swim on July 24.
  • Fluff Piece will premiere on Wonder Project on Prime Video on July 9.

R.I.P.

Ellen Weston, Actress, writer, and producer, who appeared in Get Smart, S.W.A.T., The Guiding Light, Another World, The Young and the Restless, and others

Harold Wheeler, Music director on Dancing with the Stars, and veteran orchestrator on Broadway

Ann Blyth, Oscar-nominated actress in Mildred Pierce, who also appeared in The Great Caruso, Rose Marie, The Buster Keaton Story, and others

Tim Ryan, Former Variety writer in Honolulu

WATCH THIS

FRIDAY

Life, Larry, and the Pursuit of Unhappiness: Larry David’s new show (produced by the Obamas) appears to be what would happen if Drunk History and Curb Your Enthusiasm had a baby, and I am here for it. Series premiere. 8 p.m., HBO

Little Brother: Eric Andre and John Cena star improbably as brothers in this new comedy. Premiere. Netflix

Strung: Chloe Bailey stars as a talented violinist hired to tutor the child of a wealthy family, who finds herself fighting for her sanity and survival. Premiere. Peacock

SATURDAY

Undertone: A host of a paranormal podcast becomes haunted by mysterious recordings in this horror film with decidedly mixed reviews. It sounds like if you prefer atmospheric horror, you’ll enjoy this one, but if you are looking for a jump scare, this won’t be your thing. Premiere.  7 p.m., HBO

World Cup: I’m going to recommend two games. Up first: Colombia and Portugal, which could prove to be a strong match. 6:30 p.m., Fox

World Cup: And the Democratic Republic of Congo and Uzbekistan, because I’ve become a fan of the DR Congo since they set up shop here in Houston. 6:30 p.m., FS1

SUNDAY

From: Season four finale. MGM+

BET Awards: Druski hosts. 7 p.m., BET

FRI. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC Celebrity Jeopardy!
(repeat)		 20/20
CBS Sheriff Country
(repeat)		 Fire Country
(repeat)		 Boston Blue
(repeat)
CW MLB Baseball
(live)		 News/Local
FOX World Cup
(live)		 Local
NBC America’s Got Talent
(repeat)		 Dateline

—

SAT. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30 10:00 10:30 11:00 11:30
ABC 9-1-1: Nashville
(repeat)		 9-1-1: Nashville
(repeat)		 9-1-1: Nashville
(repeat)		 News/Local
CBS WNBA Basketball
(live)		 48 Hours News/Local
FOX World Cup
(live)		 News/Local
NBC American Ninja Warrior
(repeat)		 Dateline News/
Local		 Saturday Night Live
(repeat)

—

SUN. 6:00 6:30 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC America’s Funniest Home Videos
(new)		 Armageddon
CBS 60 Minutes Marshals
(repeat)		 Tracker
(repeat)		 Marshals
(repeat)
The CW WWE NXT Local/News
FOX NHRA Drag Racing
(live)		 The Quiz With Balls
(repeat)		 Local/News
NBC MLB Baseball
(live)		 Password

Leave a Reply