The biggest October surprise is that there isn’t one.

It’s Monday. It is 8 years days until Election Day. I recommend you just watch this video on repeat (sound on):

Political Crap

We’re in the last throes of the election, so everyone is out on the trail with President Hoax out at superspreader rallies claiming that doctors lie about COVID for profit …

And let me just pause here for one second and say as the daughter of a physician, and the niece of two other physicians, and the friend of countless other doctors, fuck this lying asshole. Fuck him right in his fucking lying face. Over 1,600 American health care workers have died from this virus after saving untold thousands of their fellow Americans’ lives. How dare he impugn medical officials who have done more to stop this virus than this lazy, weak, and dumb administration. Fuck him.

~deep breath~

Elsewhere, if you missed the 60 Minutes interview, here are the last few minutes:

There were plenty of things that triggered President Snowflake, but one of the final things that clearly pissed him off was Stahl’s refusal to humor his conspiracies about Obama spying on his campaign and the Hunter Biden dumbfuckery.

About that. So, The New York Times has a hilarious story about the Trump campaign and how it had this whole big Hunter Biden October surprise cued up to land right before last week’s debate, and then they went and shot themelves in the damn foot.

The plan: in early October some Trump insiders, including a White House lawyer (who ethically may or may not be allowed to be involved in such campaign chicanery) delivered to some Wall Street Journal reporters a bunch of Hunter Biden’s emails that they claimed revealed some shady business dealings. Along with these emails, they passed along contact information to one Tony Bobulinski, a former business partner of Hunter’s who was willing to confirm that Joe Biden was aware of and profited from Hunter’s activities.

The Journal is well-respected in the business and a report that confirmed such allegations would be potentially explosive, mainstream media would have to take it seriously, and maybe do their own investigations, casting a pall of corruption over the Biden campaign in the final days of the election. Nevermind the fact that the past four years have been one corruption scandal after another with this goddamned adminstration, and nevermind the fact that during the impeachment, these allegations were investigated and found to have exactly zero merit.

So The Wall Street Jorunal reporters agreed to look into the story when out of fucking nowhere, Rudy Giuliani gets impatient and drops the whole Hunter’s laptop story over at the trash tabloid, The New York Post, who runs it without looking into it. It’s so bad and sketchy, the reporter who wrote the story refused to allow his name to be on the byline.

Around the same time, President Dumbass tells his aides in a conference call that an “important piece” would be dropping in The Journal soon, which only pissed off The Journal editors who didn’t want to look like White House tools.

Now it’s Debate Eve, and the story still hasn’t come out in The Journal because, again, they’re real reporters who take their jobs seriously. So this Tony Bobulinski character, desperate to be do his part, emails a bunch of media outlets with his statement that Joe Biden is a crook, and the next day, shows up to the debate as President One Trick Pony’s “Special Guest” … except no one knows who he is because no reputable outlets went with his story. After the debate, The Wall Street Journal finally ran a brief piece saying that they found no connection to Joe Biden in Hunter and Bobulinski’s business dealings.


It seems the media has learned a little in the past four years, and it helps that Steve Bannon so gleefully showed his hand. His playbook in 2016 was to push out into the media sphere as much bullshit he could, knowing full well that the mainstream media would run with it, out of a sense of “fairness” and not wanting to be the last one to report something that might be newsworthy. He literally called it “flooding the zone with shit.” The theory is that it is one thing to have Fox News, OANN and Brietbart reporting a story, but to persuade voters other than the rabid base, you have to have mainstream media duped into covering your nonsense. As revelaed with the Hillary email story, it worked, and it worked well.

Fortunately, the media, after four years of dire self-examination and warnings from all sides that the Russians would be trying their disinformtion crap again, didn’t fall for it this time and for the most part, like Leslie Stahl in the 60 Minutes interview above, laughed in the Trump campaign’s face when they tried to peddle it.

It also helps that:

1. Joe Biden is better liked than Hillary Clinton

2. ~knocks on wood~ FBI Director Chris Wray has so far refused to pull a James Comey and announce an investigation into Joe Biden

3. the Trump administration has been SO FUCKING CORRUPT at every turn that in comparison, most Americans just can’t get themselves worked up about a Byzyntine Ukrainian corruption scheme involving the former Vice President’s kid, and

4. which goes back to 1., Joe Biden isn’t a woman.

But before we get too excited with patting the mainstream media on the back for doing their jobs, just this morning Kristen Welker, NBC’s White House correspondent who did a good job moderating the debate just last week, credulously reported on The Today Show this morning that Joe Biden called President Rusian Mobster “George” in an interview, implying that Biden was old and confused.

Actually, she receieved the clip from the Trump campaign and no one at NBC bothered to double check it. And what do you know, but the clip had been cut in such a way to obscure the fact that Joe was talking to George Lopez. When he says “George” a couple of times, he actually speaking to Lopez, not confusing President Somehow Worse than George W. Bush with George W. Bush.

And that’s how you flood the zone with shit, friends.

It’s going to be a long 8 days. Go vote. And don’t get complacent.

There’s going to be a live table reading of A Different World, with the intention to raise awareness for voting. There will also be a Superbad reunion to raise money for Wisconsin Democrats.

Going Viral

White House COVID-19 Outbreak 2: The Pencening. Seems at least five Mike Pence aides have contracted the virus, not that this will stop him from going to rallies.

White House Chief of Staff Mark Meadows wanted to cover up this outbreak, and admitted as much on CNN yesterday morning. He also admitted that the White House is not trying to control or contain the virus. Cool. Great. Terrific.

The President of Fox News, Jay Wallace, Bret Baier, the chief political anchor; Martha MacCallum, the anchor of The Story; and Dana Perino and Juan Williams, of The Five, have all been exposed to the virus after flying on a private plane with someone who was positive. Fox News confirmed that they will be reducing staff in the building as a result. These idiots.

Kumail Nanjiani has some thoughts about those who refuse to wear masks:

BUT LISTEN. There’s nothing to be worried about. Despite 230,000 Americans dead, more than 80,000 testing positive every day, a thousand deaths a day, and a third wave that is overwhelming our hospitals, it’s all a media conspiracy. President Twitter says so.

Also, cases are surging in Europe again, setting off curfews and shutting movie theaters back down.

It looked like for a minute there, the James Bond film No Time To Die might come to VOD, but then talks fell apart.

We’ve got to do better than this.

A Million Little Things will cover both Black Lives Matter and the virus when it returns on ABC next month.

HBO is making The Day Sports Stood Still, a documentary about the sports shutdown that occurred in March.

All Other TV News

Wait, is Jeff Zucker being kicked out at CNN? MAYBE.

Larry David’s favorite Seinfeld episode is probably the one you think it is.

What’s going on with Wendy Williams?

Good for Jill Duggar! Keep getting that therapy, girl!

Unsolved Mysteries is receiving hundreds of tips on the whereabouts of Lester Eubanks. GET HIM, GUYS.

I was too old for Family Matters when it originally aired, so I missed the “Stevil” episodes. But I’ve seen all I need to see, thanks.

The National Comedy Center will maintain Johnny Carson’s archives

Get well soon, Arnold Schwarzenegger!


  • black-ish has been given a full-season order at ABC. I SHOULD THINK SO.
  • Cherish the Day has been renewed for a second season on OWN. 

In Development

  • Sovereign, a Native American family drama from Ava DuVernay is being developed at NBC.
  • Archive 81, a supernatural horror series starring Mamoudou Athie, and Dina Shihabi, is being produced by James Wan for Netflix.
  • New York Undercover is maybe being rebooted at Peacock.
  • Warped!, a comic book store comedy, is being developed at Nickelodeon.
  • Mephisto, a drama series based on a real-life female Italian prosecutor who went after the mob, is in the works.
  • Suzanne Mackie has signed an exclusive deal with Netflix.

Casting News

Mark Your Calendar

  • Chilling Adventures of Sabrina will return on Netflix on December 31.
  • Selena: The Series will premiere on Netflix on December 4.
  • A Creepshow Animated Special will debut on Shudder on October 29.
  • Tekashi 6ix9ine: The Rise and Fall of a Hip Hop Supervillain will debut on Showtime sometime in 2021.
  • Life After Lockup returns on WeTV on November 20.
  • Kid Correspondent debuts on YouTube on October 26.


William Blinn, Creator of Starsky & Hutch and writer of Purple Rain, Roots, Bonanza, and Fame, among others.

Jerry Jeff Walker, Iconic Texas country singer (though he wasn’t originally from Texas, he got here as soon as he could).

Daryl Grove, Total Soccer podcaster

Lee Kun-hee, Former Samsung chairman who led the company into becoming the largest producer of smartphones, televisions, and memory chips in the world.

Ming Cho Lee, Tony-winning Broadway scenic designer


Essential Heroes: A Momento Latino Event: In this special event, Latino culture and diversity are celebrated, while also calling attention to how hard hit the community has been by COVID-19. Hosted by Eva Longoria, Gloria Estefan, and Ricky Martin, the special will feature musical performances, comedy bits, and docu-shorts. 8 p.m., CBS

America’s Hidden Stories: The first episode of the second season focuses on Hitler’s secret attempt to interfere in the 1940 U.S. election. NO REASON. 7 p.m., Smithsonian

Ruby Sparks: If you haven’t seen this sharp and very feminist take on the Pygmalion myth, it’s worth your time. 9:15 p.m., HBO Signature

Late Night:

  • Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon: Sterling K. Brown, Zoe Lister-Jones, Matthew “Super” DeLisi, Rina Sawayama
  • Late Night with Seth Meyers: Gwen Stefani, Giancarlo Esposito
  • The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: Sacha Baron Cohen, Jeff Tweedy
  • The Late Late Show with James Corden: Aaron Sorkin, the Shins
  • Jimmy Kimmel Live: Bill Maher, Louis Partridge, 24kGoldn featuring Iann Dior
  • The Daily Show: TBA
  • Conan: Heidi Gardner
  • Watch What Happens Live: “Below Deck Mediterranean” Reunion, Part 2

MON. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC Dancing With the Stars
Emergency Call
CBS Big Brother
Essential Heroes: A Momento Latino Event One Day at a Time
One Day at a Time
CW Whose Line is it Anyway?
Whose Line is it Anyway?
Penn & Teller: Try This At Home Too
FOX L.A.’s Finest
Filthy Rich
NBC The Voice
Weakest Link


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