MONDAY
9-1-1: My favorite thing about Ryan Murphy’s batshit insane emergency services procedural is how everyone is like, “HAVE YOU SEEN THIS BATSHIT INSANE SHOW?” Yeah, welcome to Ryan Murphy shows, bitches. Mid-season premiere. 8 p.m., Fox
The Fix: Marcia Clarke’s revenge fantasy. Series premiere. 9 p.m., ABC
Black Lightning: “The Book of the Apocalypse: Chapter Two: The Omega.” Well, THAT sounds ominous. Season finale. 8 p.m., The CW
TUESDAY
Mental Samurai: In this new competition, contestants “navigate an obstacle course … OF THE MIND!” Series premiere. 8 p.m., Fox
The Village: In NBC’s latest attempt to recapture that This is Us lightning in a bottle, this new emotional drama follows the lives of the residents of a Brooklyn building. Series premiere. 9 p.m., NBC
Amy Schumer: Growing: Pregnant Amy Schumer tells jokes. Premiere. Netflix
WEDNESDAY
The Act: I’m completely obsessed with this story of Munchausen Syndrome, murder, and shaved heads. Series premiere. Hulu
Pretty Little Liars: The Perfectionists: The stress of needing to be perfect leads to murder. You know, like it does. Series premiere. 7 p.m., Freeform
Bublé!: Michael Bublé does his Michael Bublé thing. 9 p.m., NBC
All American: It’s the season finale of the one show The CW might cancel this season. 8 p.m., The CW
THURSDAY
Supernatural: Sam and Dean come up against a monster they’ve never heard of and here’s where I would make a joke about the monster being person who doesn’t know how to load a dishwasher or the person who blocks the entire grocery aisle when you’re just trying to get through, but having just disembarked from an airplane, I think we can all agree that the real monsters are those people who are traveling in a huge family group and who will already get on between the A and B groups because they have small children, but use their grandpa — who can WALK JUST FINE — to preboard the entire group, all 17 family members, because they are obviously more important than everyone else. MONSTERS. 7 p.m., The CW
Critters: A New Binge: Children of the 80s will be excited to learn these little monsters are back in a new TV series. Series premiere. Shudder
FRIDAY
The OA: THE CRAZIEST SHOW IN NETFLIX HISTORY IS BACK YOU GUYS PLEASE DO NOT DISTURB ME THIS WEEKEND. Season premiere. Netflix
The Dirt: I was never a Mötley Crüe fan, but I was alive when all … this happened, so hell yeah, I’m going to watch this nonsense. Netflix
Mirage: Don’t go fucking around with the time/space continuum, y’all. Netflix
SATURDAY
The Meg: Story time: When I worked in book publishing some twenty years ago, our publisher bought the novel this movie is based on and he was SO EXCITED and absolutely convinced it was going to be the next Jaws. It was not the next Jaws. 7 p.m., HBO
Funny Women of a Certain Age: LET’S LEAVE AGE OUT OF IT, SHALL WE. 8 p.m., Showtime
SUNDAY
Into the Badlands: The third and final season of this crazyass show. Series premiere. 9 p.m., AMC
Action: A look at professional gamblers and bookmakers during the 2018 football season. Series premiere. 7 p.m., Showtime
King Charles III: LOL, As if Queen Elizabeth is ever going to die. 8 p.m., PBS