Conan is going to Haiti for an episode because fuck you, Donald Trump. If President Racist doesn’t like the Haitians, they must be lovely people.
Stephen Colbert compares Trump bragging about his “shithole” comments to a toddler calling his mother to the potty. “Come look at the load I dropped in the national discourse!” And on the semantic differences between “shithouse” and “shithole,” Colbert suggests Trump is an “asshouse” who doesn’t belong in the “White Hole.”
Seth Meyers takes a closer look at the ongoing fallout of our dumb President’s dumb racism, and argues that if Trump really wants a “merit-based” immigration system, he should have to go back to whatever bog his family crawled out of and get in the back of the line.”:
Jimmy Fallon notes that “Former White House communications director Anthony Scaramucci defended Trump, saying, ‘At the end of the day, he’s not a racist.’ Then he said, ‘During the day, it’s a different story.’”
Trevor Noah marvels at Sentaor Cotton and Perdue’s changing memories about what, exactly, Trump said in the immigration meeting, before pointing out the obvious: that the vulgar words Trump said aren’t what are offensive here:
Jimmy Kimmel is genuinely insulted by Cotton and Perdue’s brazen lies in their effort to protect their racist president.
Jordan Klepper argues that Trump isn’t racist, he’s “basest.”
Seth Meyers notes that Trump celebrated Martin Luther King, Jr. Day doing the most White thing possible:
Kimmel also talked about that Google portrait app that DOESN’T WORK IN TEXAS. Which is some bullshit.