It the best of the times, it was the most boring of times. Last night’s Olympic coverage was a mixed bag, at best. There were a few thrilling moments in the pool, but then, good God, did we spend a lot of time watching track and field HEATS. Not even semifinals! Semi-semi finals. Do you even care about that? Will you even remember? Even the athletes looked bored!
Continue reading “The Rio Olympics: A Dog In Heats”
Sorry for missing the last few days of blogging, y’all. I’ve just been so busy booting up Grindr and hunting down dates with journalists. (Just kidding! Journalists can’t afford dates!) Look, people, the first rule of Grindr is we don’t talk about Grindr, specifically whom we see on Grindr. The second rule is NO STRAIGHTIES ALLOWED. I don’t show up at your fantasy football party and tell everyone which Facts of Life actress you’re all jerking off to together, or whatever the fuck you people do there. Leave our sexy, horny Olympic hotties to get theirs.