President Bloviator just gave the longest, most gaslighting State of the Union ever

OH NO IT’S A DINOSAUR

@pugloulou

Beware of this dinosaur and her chomps 🦖🦕 IB: @Bepo と Tomodachi #pug #dog #pugsoftiktok #dogsoftiktok

♬ original sound – WinkWinkCrew

Here’s A BUNCH OF TV News

The State of the Union took place last night, and apparently it was the longest in history. Hardly surprising. I didn’t watch it because fuck that guy I don’t need to waste three hours of my life being gaslit, but I’m pretty sure this is an excellent recap of what went down.

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I do want to give props to Texas — HOUSTON — representative Al Green for once again protesting that racist asshole without even mentioning his name. All Representative Green did was hold up a sign that read “BLACK PEOPLE AREN’T APES,” and the Republicans threw him out of the chamber. What’s the old expression again? Hit dogs will holler?

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Tony Dokoupil is out here showing his whole ass again. (If you are looking for a saner take on last night’s speech, here you go.)

Paramount has indeed sweetened its deal for Warner Bros. Netflix expected this to be Paramount’s best and final offer, so it’s possible they could return with their own bid that would be superior. I guess we’ll see.

Taylor Sheridan is moving his Tulsa King spinoff starring Samuel L. Jackson to Texas from New Orleans. It was originally to be entitled “NOLA King,” but now will be “Frisco King,” and set in Frisco, Texas.

You’ll be able to watch the first two episodes of One Piece in the movie theater next month. I’m not sure why you would, but you can.

Airbnb The Cottage and take your mind off the fact that the next Heated Rivalry book has pushed its pub date back to 2027.

Could Doctor Who find a new home on HBO Max? Maybe!

Apparently, One Million Moms is mad about a Dunkin’ Donuts ad because they didn’t grow up in the 80s watching Solid Gold or the Jane Fonda workout tapes.

Flavor Flav turning into America’s Girl Dad is the best character development of the past ten years.

LOL, actual professional soccer players have a lot to say about Love is Blind‘s Number 2 asshole, Alex (Alec? unclear).

Here’s a Melania producer whining that musicians refused to allow them to use their music: “She apparently couldn’t get over the political hurdle, notwithstanding the fact that the film is not a political film.” BITCH, IT IS A FLUFF DOCUMENTARY ABOUT THE FIRST LADY TO THE MOST CONTROVERSIAL PRESIDENT OF ALL TIME, PAID FOR BY A BILLIONAIRE OLIGARCH DESPERATE TO REMAIN IN THE PRESIDENT’S GOOD GRACES, OF COURSE IT’S POLITICAL.

Cancellations

  • Industry will end on HBO with season five.
  • It is unofficial — it has neither been renewed nor has the series finale been announced — but Paradise is expected to end with season three on Hulu.
  • Doctor Foster will return for a third and final season on BBC One and BBC iPlayer.

In Development

Casting News

Mark Your Calendars

  • Ready or Not Texas debuts on Netflix on March 24.
  • The Real Housewives of Atlanta returns on Bravo on April 5.
  • The Count of Monte Cristo premieres on PBS on March 22.
  • Love & Marriage: Huntsville returns on OWN on March 7.
  • Great British Baking Show: Juniors debuts on Roku on March 13.
  • That Thrifting Show with Lara Spencer will premiere on Freeform on March 19.
  • Dinosaur returns on Hulu on February 25.
  • If It’s Tuesday, It’s Murder premieres on Hulu on March 31.

R.I.P.

Katherine Short, Daughter of Martin Short. Keep Martin Short in your thoughts, this man has been through so much loss in his life (he lost a brother and both parents by the time he was 20; and his wife after 36 years of marriage) and very recently, with the passing of his dear friends, Diane Keaton, Rob Reiner, and Catherine O’Hara in such a shot period of time.

Lauren Chapin, Child actress best known for her role on Father Knows Best

John Wheeler, Character actor who appeared in Star Trek, The Dukes of Hazard, The Odd Couple, Dallas, ER, The Golden Girls and many other series, movies and Broadway productions

Gregory de Polnay, British actor, director, voice teacher and performance coach

WATCH THIS

Scrubs: John “J.D.” Dorian returns to Sacred Heart in the series reboot premiere. 7 p.m., ABC & Hulu

Survivor: Somehow, it’s the 50th season, and CBS has brought back 24 popular players to celebrate. The theme is “In the Hands of the Fans,” putting the fans in control. Season premiere. 7 p.m., CBS

The Greatest Average American: In this rip-off of Family Feud new game show hosted by Nate Bargatze, contestants have to answer trivia questions as close to the average American does, to win a grand prize of $67,920, the average American salary. Series premiere.  8 p.m., ABC

The Bluff: Priyanka Chopra Jonas and Keith Urban star in this swashbuckling adventure film. Prime Video

Late Night:

  • Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon: Kit Harington, Mike White, Jackson White, Carter Faith
  • Late Night with Seth Meyers: Lizzo, Jake Shane
  • The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: Teyana Taylor, Bradley Whitford
  • Jimmy Kimmel Live: Jason Bateman, Chloe Kim
  • The Daily Show: Jonathan Haidt, Catherine Price, host Desi Lydic
  • Watch What Happens Live: Venita Aspen, Lisa Rinna

WEDS. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC Scrubs
(new)
Scrubs
(new)
Greatest Average American
(new)
Scrubs
(repeat)
CBS Survivor
(new)
CW Police 24/7
(new)
Police 24/7
(repeat)
Local
FOX The Masked Singer
(new)
Fear Factor: House of Fear
(new)
News/Local
NBC The Voice
(repeat)
Chicago P.D.
(new)

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