‘The Bachelor’: The fantasy of a decision

by Therese Odell, posted in the bachelor: season 29

The Bachelor
March 17, 2025

Welcome to the Dominican Republic, the last stop on our journey to find a wife for one former basketball player/day trader. Before we move on, I’m obviously weeks late to this episode, but since the time this and the finale aired, the Dominican Republic has suffered a terrible tragedy when a roof collapsed at a popular nightclub while it was packed with music fans. 221 people died and another 189 were injured. Our thoughts are with everyone in the country.

As for why we’re in the Dominican Republic for The Bachelor, the reason is twofold: 1. This is where Grant played basketball professionally for a few seasons and 2. His grandmother is originally from the island and therefore he feels like he has a connection. And yet, despite all of this, Grant speaks zero Spanish because he’s American, dammit.

Before the dates begin, Grant chats with Jesse Palmer about how this week works: it’s an important opportunity to spend time with each woman privately before he makes his decision about who he is going to marry NEXT WEEK. Grant makes it clear that the physical part is less important to him than the emotional connection, but he doesn’t explicitly rule out the physical element, either. Though Grant claimed to have been celibate for a year before beginning the show, notably he makes no promises to remain that way.

The first date will be with Front Runner, who, before meeting with Grant, has a little breakfast drinkie with Daisy from Joey’s season. There, Front Runner tells Daisy that she’s falling in love with Grant but that she has a great deal of apprehension about Grant spending this intimate time with two other women; that it’s bringing up a lot of trauma from being cheated on repeatedly by her ex. Daisy’s like, “Yeah, well, good luck with that.”

Front Runner then meets up with Grant for their date where he drives her through mud puddles in an ATV.

Grant:

Front Runner:

When they’re done, Grant notes that Front Runner was worried about how she looked — SINCE SHE WAS COVERED IN WET AND ICK — but that he thought she looked beautiful. And that’s sweet, but I bet she would have enjoyed a nice beach picnic or spa date instead.

They pull over and enjoy a glass of wine where Grant tells Front Runner about his grandmother being from the Dominican Republic and how he liked her cooking. Front Runner is like, “Cool. Meanwhile, I’m internally spiraling, but we can talk about that later.”

That evening, after Front Runner is allowed to shower and reapply her makeup and get out of her mud-splattered clothes, the two meet for dinner. Front Runner opens up again about how this week is challenging for her and bringing back old feelings from being cheated on. Front Runner cries as she tells Grant that she’s “a little broken” and still working on herself and afraid that someone will not love her for the “full” her. Front Runner admits that it’s scary to have someone so great like Grant in front of her and know that he might not ultimately choose her, because he means so much to her already.

Grant, who has been crying right along with her, says that he has broken parts, too, but that he’s also willing to work on himself.

“That’s what love is for,” this man goes on to say, “it fixes you.”

I AM BEGGING YOU PEOPLE TO GO TO THERAPY.

Grant goes on to tell her that he knows she was self-conscious about her hair during the date but that he was thinking how beautiful she was and she didn’t even know, that he’d take that over glitz and glamour every day. Grant reassures her that she doesn’t have to be perfect, and that he’ll be there for her on the days she doesn’t feel beautiful to tell her that she is. He then hands her a Polaroid photo of the two of them from her Dreaded Hometown where he notes she looked so happy. This seems to cheer her up.

He tells her that he’s falling in love with her, and gives her the Fantasy Suite invitation, which she readily accepts.

The next morning, Front Runner tells Grant that she feels “great,” that it was a “12 out of 10” experience, would do again.

As Grant begins to take his leave, Front Runner admits that not seeing him again for a couple of days is going to make her “lose [her] mind.” And sure enough, as soon as he walks away, Front Runner is already talking about how already spiraling, thinking about him spending time with the other women.

Next up is T-Shirt Gun who is paired up with Rachel from Joey’s season for bottomless mimosas. Together, they discuss the fact that they both came into Fantasy Suites week having spent the least amount of time with their respective Bachelors, and Rachel encourages her to hang in there. Fat lot of good it did her, but sure.

As for their date, T-Shirt Gun arrives in a dress, only to be informed by Grant that they are going to do silent couples yoga.

Now, first of all, it’s maybe not fair to put the woman who has spent the least amount of time with Grant on a date where she literally is forbidden to speak to him. It feels like sabotage.

But that said, this could have been a sexy, funny date if these two had an iota of chemistry. Sure, Grant jokes about trying to not fart, and T-Shirt Gun worries about her hair extentions, but they are clearly hating every second of this date, and their absolute lack of connection isn’t making it any better.

What I would have given to have seen Llama Drama on this date. She would have had a great time.

That evening over dinner, they talk about how much they fucking hated the date, and how they haven’t had much time together. Sounds like love!

T-Shirt Gun notes that she doesn’t actually know much about him, and that while she thinks he’s a good man, he’s also something of a tough nut to crack.

Grant: “I like to have fun. I love R&B and rap. My favorite color is blue.”

T-Shirt Gun asks him what her favorite color is, and he’s like, “Blue?”

She corrects him that it is teal.

Wow, grab a preacher, these two are practically walking down the aisle!

Grant finally opens up to T-Shirt Gun, telling her the same story that we’ve heard about 15 times already: his dad struggled with addiction; his mother was busy holding the family together; he was a lonley child; and when he has his own family, THEY ARE GOING TO EAT DINNER TOGETHER GODDAMMIT.

T-Shirt Gun notes that she had a similar childhood, and that security is really important to her. Also: she wants to travel and have parties and have fun experiences and then a few years down the road, start to have kids. Grant is like, “Cool. Want to go to the Fantasy Suites?” She happily accepts.

(To be fair to T-Shirt Gun, she didn’t ask him what his favorite color was: he just volunteered that up for no good reason at all.)

The next morning, the two go for a beach picnic? Which is a first on these shows, I think? There they talk about how they dove deep into their similar childhoods and issues and toast to taking the next step. (The next step being sending her ass home once and for all, obviously.)

Finally, Miss Mormon meets Kaity from Zach’s season over mimosas coffee water, and she explains that she has no intention of becoming intimate on tonight’s date, but is worried about what Grant has been doing with the other women.

Kaity is like, “Yeah, so, I’ve got a story: Zach was all, ‘I WILL BE HAVING NO SEX IN FANTASY SUITES!’ ahead of time, and then 30 minutes into our date, he confessed he had sex with one of the other women. Which was uncool! It totally ruined our date! So my advice to you is to tell Grant from the get-go that you don’t want to hear about his dates with the other women, to just keep that shit to himself.”

It’s genuinely some very solid advice, and Miss Mormon gladly accepts it.

On their date, Grant takes Miss Mormon ziplining. She hates every second of it.

After, they go swimming at some ridiculously beautiful blue hole where they talk about how her family accepted him at the Dreaded Hometowns and how he might want to live in New Jersey to be near his father. Miss Mormon lights up at the idea of moving to New York City, and Grant’s like, “Well, I didn’t say all that; we’ll see where it goes.”

That evening, Miss Mormon chooses to wear a top? dress? that her grandma crocheted for her?

Such a pretty woman, such questionable taste in clothes.

Grant asks her what she thinks is the next step on their timeline, and when she answers meeting his family and getting engaged, Grant is like, “no, specifically, when do you want to start a family because the one takeaway from the Dreaded Hometowns is that you want to be a mom yesterday.”

Miss Mormon is all, “Yeah, I’m 31, so I’ve got about two more years before things start becoming serious. But I also want to have a solid foundation in my marriage, and that’s a decision we will make together.”

Grant tells us that Miss Mormon’s kid timeline is faster than his, but notes he can compromise for someone he really loves.

Miss Mormon discusses her anxiety about him spending time with the other women, but insists that she doesn’t want to hear about his time with them. Grant assures her that he understands, before offering her the Fantasy Suite key. And Miss Mormon is like, “Cool, but there’s not gonna be any shenanigans going on in there.”

Grant tells her that he respects her decision and that he just wants to spend time with her because he can see her as his wife. “I do love you,” he adds.

No “I’m falling in love with you,” or “I have feelings for you…” “I DO LOVE YOU,” full stop.

The next morning, they have a little breakfast in bed and toast to being in a good place.

As Grant leaves the hotel room, he tells us that this is only the second time he’s ever told someone that he loved them, and that she is someone he could spend every day with. Grant notes that there are other people that he has feelings for, and wonders, exactly, how to maneuver through this: does he pick Miss Mormon now or does he continue to pursue other women?

Excuse me WHAT? Are we done here?

Well, apparently, we’re going to have to sit through another Rose Ceremony first:

Rose #1: Miss Mormon
Rose #2: Front Runner

Which means the woman who must go away now is: T-Shirt Gun.

As Grant walks T-Shirt Gun out, she delivers a whole monologue about how she knows that he had a tough choice and that she’s sad to see this come to an end and that he is a kind and emotionally available man which is hard to come by in this day and age and that she hopes he finds the right woman.

Grant: “Uh-huh.”

But somehow we’re not yet done with the episode, because suddenly we’re welcoming his parents to the D.R.?

~frantically checks how much time is left on the episode; sighs with relief when it is only 4 minutes~

Grant greets his parents and is like I HAVE A HUGE DECISION TO MAKE AND I AM FREAKING OUT. “Stay tuned for my demise,” he groans.


Here are the ladies who have been eliminated along with their very not good nicknames:

Here are the women along with their dumb nicknames who are still “dating” Grant:

 

 

The Bachelor airs on ABC on Mondays at 7/8 p.m. and streams on Hulu.

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