I’m still mad that I don’t have a miniature cow.
Mello has to rev up before he can get a Moo going. #microcow #minicow #highlandcow #babyanimals #babyanimals #DoritosTriangleTryout #petsoftiktok #petcow #moo #cowsoftiktok #babycowsoftiktok #minifluffycows #cutebabycow
Here’s A BUNCH OF TV News
Obviously, yesterday’s biggest story in the world was that
Judge Janet Protasiewicz won a spot on the Wisconsin Supreme Court, tipping the balance of said court to the left just in time for the court to hear vitally important cases on abortion and gerrymandering and hopefully adding a guardrail in the event of presidential election shenanigans in 2024 Former President Election Shenanigans was arrested and charged with 34 felony counts of falsifying business documents in the first degree. Technically, he could face over 100 years in prison for this — but it’s unlikely he’ll see a day in jail, even if he’s found guilty, let’s all be honest. While it was deeply satisfying to see this moment of comeuppance for the Former Shit-Gibbon-in-Chief — and he looked sad — as I’ve said before, I am not going to celebrate until the convictions, and hopefully, other indictments come in.
Some notable things about yesterday:
Melania didn’t join him in New York, nor was she at his speech at Mar-A-Lago last night. Nor was Ivanka.
Marjorie Taylor Greene’s rally for her Orange Jim Jones was a hilarious disaster that she fled after about 3 minutes.
Fox News’ Jesse Waters fantasized about Former President Lock Him Up being assassinated.
Dummy Jr. posted a photo of the judge’s daughter on social media yesterday. Dummy Sr. called the judge in his case a “Trump-hating judge with a Trump hating wife and family whose daughter worked for Kamala Harris.” Judge Merchan is going to be very reluctant to issue a gag order on Former President Arsonist and his family for First Amendment and political reasons, but I don’t know how he avoids it.
Because nothing says “innocent” like threatening a judge’s family https://t.co/hk9fyvdflH
— Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (@AOC) April 4, 2023
And there was some weirdo at the press scrum after who brought along a mannequin leg? I have lots of questions about this one.
The guy holding the leg during the Trump press conference is my hero. #leg pic.twitter.com/QzMR5rGm2P
— c͎h͎r͎i͎s͎t͎i͎n͎a͎✨l͎y͎n͎n͎e͎ (@dontputmeonair) April 4, 2023
And of course, late night had jokes:
Jimmy Fallon joked about Former President 34 Felony Counts making history, but notes that the good news is that in Florida, they’ve already thrown out all the history books:
Stephen Colbert said that it was a beautiful day in New York yesterday, “70 degrees and sunny with a chance of jail.”
Seth Meyers noted that Former President American Cheese Residue is “presumed innocent until he outright confesses on Truth Social.”
Jon Stewart stopped by The Daily Show to help Roy Wood Jr. go viral with his coverage of the indictments (he shows up around the 9:55 mark):
And Jimmy Kimmel — who is kicking himself for going on vacation this week — tweeted the following:
When all your dads end up in jail. pic.twitter.com/jNmiVj85gH
— Jimmy Kimmel (@jimmykimmel) April 4, 2023
When asked what one word describes the Succession finale, the cast replied: “startling,” “surprising,” “savage,” “shocking,” “sobering,” and “heartbreaking.” THAT DOESN’T SOUND PROMISING.
The first season of The Lord of the Rings: Rings of Power had only a 37% completion rate. Oof. That’s not a great rate of return, y’all.
The Today Show won this year’s Peabody Institutional Award.
Jensen Ackles is out here teasing that Soldier Boy might be making an appearance on Gen V.
- This isn’t a cancelation, but I’m not sure where else to put it, but having been canceled, The L Word: Generation Q is no longer available on Showtime’s streaming service.
- Cruel Intentions has risen from the dead yet again, and in development at Freevee.
- Vanderbilt is being adapted into a series at Prime Video.
- Clans of the Alphane Moon is being developed at Prime Video
- Koreatown, a drama set in Los Angeles’ Koreatown, is in development at Prime Video.
- LOL: Last One Laughing Ireland, hosted by Graham Norton, has been ordered at Prime Video.
- Pauline, a German series about a pregnant teen who falls in love with the Devil, has been ordered at … ~rubs eyes~ … Disney+? Yeah, there’s no way that streams in the U.S. NO CHANCE.
- Steph Curry and Adam Pally will star in Mr. Throwback, a comedy on NBC from the creator of Happy Endings.
- Kit Harington has joined Industry on HBO and BBC.
- Dexter Darden, Chloe Bridges, and Robert Buckley have been added to the cast of the NBC pilot Non-Evil Twin.
- Mark Feuerstein has joined Hotel Cocaine on MGM+.
- April Ryan and Ana Cabera have joined MSNBC.
Mark Your Calendars
- The Diplomat will debut on Netflix on April 20.
- Somebody Somewhere returns on HBO on April 23.
- TLC Forever will premiere on Lifetime and A&E on June 3.
- Til Death Do Us Part Kourtney & Travis will debut on Hulu on April 13.
- Jeopardy! Masters will debut on ABC on May 8.
- Celeste Barber: Fine, Thanks will debut on Netflix on April 12.
- Vice will return on Showtime on May 7.
- The Nevers will debut on Roku on April 8. Many of the other shows dropped by HBO are now streaming on Roku including Westworld, F-Boy Island and Raised by Wolves.
- Flipping 101 with Tarek El Moussa returns on HGTV on May 4.
Andrés García, Mexican telenvovela star
Heklinka, San Francisco drag legend
Schmigadoon!: Melissa and Josh return to Schmigadoon, only to find it’s … darker. Season 2 premiere. Apple TV+
Dave: Dave and the gang go on tour … and come to Texas in the season premiere. 9 p.m., FXX
Deep in the Heart: A Texas Wildlife Story: This documentary narrated by Matthew McConaughey is a celebration of Texas’ unique wildlife, and a plea to save it. 9 p.m., PBS
- Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon: Matt Damon, Cecily Strong, Rema
- Late Night with Seth Meyers: Chris Pratt, Ali Wong, the Hold Steady, Brann Dailor
- The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: Victor Glover, Reid Wiseman, Christina Koch, Jeremy Hansen, Jodie Comer
- The Daily Show: Guest host Roy Wood Jr.
- Watch What Happens Live: John Owen Lowe, Tom Schwartz
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