It’s Friday. It is not Saturday.
And this is exactly why I keep telling you people what day it is:
It would appear I have fucked up. pic.twitter.com/pLeGacil8y
— David Hughes (@david8hughes) May 7, 2021
All Other TV News
The single funniest thing I’ve seen today is Newsmax’s Greg Kelly defensively trying to claim that his pair of GENUINELY TERRIBLE cargo pants cost $1200, as if that makes them good and not weird and ill-fitting, when — Plot Twist! — the pants he was wearing actually cost $97 from Alibaba.
Chillin’ with 45! (And yes. Those are BUGLE BOY jeans I’m wearing) pic.twitter.com/g8EwzRgrAs
— Greg Kelly (@gregkellyusa) May 6, 2021
Everyone busting my CRACKERS over the “pants”—(partially my fault because I called attention to them with the Bugle Boy comment). The truth is, they’re BALMAIN (the most prestigious brand in PANTS)—my shoes are by Ferragamo. Basically, I’m a Sharp Dressed Man. Thank you ! pic.twitter.com/sDgtoGy9Ol
— Greg Kelly (@gregkellyusa) May 6, 2021
Actually they are 96.99 from aliexpress. Balmain cargo pants only have 1 zipper pocket but the knock offs have 2. Odd thing to lie about. pic.twitter.com/PaTFQmSumM
— 🌷Michelle🌷 (@Irish_Rose14) May 7, 2021
Literally, LITERALLY, nothing will give me more joy than this today. This is a thing a grown-ass man typed out: “the most prestigious brand in PANTS” — HE TYPED THAT! THAT’S A THING HE TYPED! A THING THAT HE THOUGHT SOUNDED REASONABLE!
YO U GOT THE MALLMAINS WITH THE FERRAGAMO LOAFS AND THE VAN HEUSEN WRINKLE FREE SHIRT / BLAZER COMBO TF IS HAPPENING HERE GREGORY? 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 https://t.co/E2JFA26cZq
— THE KID MERO 🇩🇴 (@THEKIDMERO) May 7, 2021
Are these the pants you were wearing when you smoked jazz cigarettes and ended up in Kenya https://t.co/AmovGRDIDW pic.twitter.com/Dda6M1aPE0
— ⚓️🚢Imani Gandy 🚢⚓️ (@AngryBlackLady) May 7, 2021
Everyone busting my CRACKERS over the “pants”—(partially my fault because I called attention to them with the Bugle Boy comment). The truth is, they’re BALMAIN (the most prestigious brand in PANTS)—my shoes are by Ferragamo. Basically, I’m a Sharp Dressed Man. Thank you ! pic.twitter.com/0zrosgXo5f
— Josh Spiegel (@mousterpiece) May 7, 2021
Impeachment: American Crime Story has full input from one Monica Lewinsky, who is not only a producer, but is “involved with every script” according to Ryan Murphy. And here’s something I did not know until today: Clive Owen is going to play Bill Clinton? What the huh?
Elon Musk is not the first non-entertainer to host Saturday Night Live and, unfortunately for all of us, he won’t be the last.
Wait, people are blaming Kourtney Kardashian for the end of Keeping Up With the Kardashians and not the fact that Ryan Seacrest Productions signed an overall deal with ABC Studios? Lol, ok.
Oh no, we’re going to lose Jen Psaki? (In a year, maybe.) BUT SHE’S SOOO GOOOOOOOOD!
Yo-Yo Ma playing DMX and Britney Spears on his cello for Desus & Mero is as delightful as it sounds.
UPDATE: I’m still laughing at Greg Kelly’s pants.
The case numbers continue to tick downwards and look good, the job numbers … eh, not so much.
Meanwhile, as businesses start returning in person, they are weighing the question of whether or not to require their employees to get the vaccine. Many would very much like to so as to protect their workforce and their customers, but they are worried about being sued.
It’s interesting, though not exactly equivalent, but in the cruise industry, the CDC has decided against requiring passengers to be vaccinated in order to take a cruise. This decision comes in large part because the state of Florida, from which most U.S. cruises dock, made it illegal for businesses to require their patrons be vaccinated. Florida’s dumbass GOP thought this would be good for businesses, but instead, it is profoundly complicating things for the cruise industry in particular. Now before they can start cruising again, the cruise lines have to — and this is true — do test cruises with volunteer passengers to make sure they can cruise safely. Additionally, the passengers will no longer be able to explore destinations on their own, and masks and social distancing will still be required. None of this would be required if the federal government could just say, “Sorry, no vaccine: no cruise!” but they’ve been hamstrung by local anti-science governments. It’s all very stupid and counterproductive.
People are still real mad at Ivanka for getting vaccinated.
This afternoon, I gratefully received my second dose of the COVID-19 vaccine. Getting fully vaccinated is the best way to end this pandemic and protect ourselves and one another. ♥️ pic.twitter.com/7zcvuiG0a9
— Ivanka Trump (@IvankaTrump) May 5, 2021
“Being a test subject is not my idea of wisdom…. Sad that you and others would even condone this…. Can’t wait for Americans to wake up!” wrote one Twitter user in response to Ivanka’s second dose. “Sad and regrettable that you promotes an EXPERIMENTAL substance disguised as a ‘vaccine’ that does not ‘Vaccinate’,” said another. Other responses included “Love your family but this is a huge NO for me & my family. Will be praying you do not get any of the horrible side affects”; “Grateful until you get [sick face emoji] from it”; and “You are crazy. Vaccine is poison.”
Ivanka, you ain’t my favorite, but I’m still grateful you did this so publicly since your cowardly father refused to.
Japan may not be ready for the Summer Olympics after all.
Chicago, the musical, will return to the stage for its 25th season on September 14 in New York. (I promise I won’t mention every Broadway show returning — but this feels like a notable development.)
The L.A. Pride Parade will be canceled again this year, but promises to return in 2022.
Here’s an interesting video on how crowd scenes have been created during a time when people are supposed to stay six feet apart:
- Don’t Be Tardy has been canceled at Bravo after eight seasons.
- The Circle U.K. will end after three seasons at Channel 4.
- Cinderella, starring Camila Cabello, is coming to Amazon Prime.
- The next Paranormal Activity will premiere on Paramount+.
- Invisible Life, Just As I Am and Abide With Me have been optioned for a series adaptation at HBO.
- The Magic Order is back in production at Netflix.
- They Both Die at the End is being adapted for TV.
- Loch Down Abbey is being adapted into a TV series.
- Sci-fi podcast From Now is going to be adapted into a series at Amazon.
- A documentary about Willie Mays is coming to HBO and HBO Max.
- HBO Max has greenlit García, based on the graphic novel.
- Jesse Williams is leaving Grey’s Anatomy after 12 seasons. The May 20 episode will be his last.
- David Tennant is joining the cast of The Amazing Maurice on Sky.
- Erika Alexander, Derek Luke, and Sam Trammell will lead the cast of American Refugee on Epix.
- Theo James is not returning to Sandition on PBS.
- The Ultimate Surfer has announced its surfers.
Mark Your Calendar
- The Bold Type will return on Freeform on May 26.
- Sailor Moon Eternal will premiere on Netflix on June 3.
- Muppets Haunted Mansion will debut on Disney+ this fall.
- Dancing Queens will premiere on Netflix on June 3.
- The Neighbor debuts on Netflix on May 21.
- Going from Broke returns on Crackle on May 20.
- The Amusement Park will premiere on Shudder on June 8.
- Xtreme will debut on Netflix on June 4.
- Mad for Each Other will debut on Netflix on May 24.
- Creator’s File: GOLD will premiere on Netflix on June 3.
- Secrets of the Lost Ark premieres on Science Channel on May 23.
- BBQ Brawl returns on Food Network on June 14.
- Too Large premieres on discovery+ on June 2.
- Two Steps Home will premiere on HGTV on June 16.
- The Today Show has announced their summer concert dates:
It's here! Check out the 2021 Citi Music Series on TODAY lineup! pic.twitter.com/EMJnvZq8P5
— TODAY (@TODAYshow) May 7, 2021
Bob Abernethy, Host of PBS’s Religion & Ethics NewsWeekly, and longtime NBC News correspondent
Jimmy Rich, Robert Downey Jr.’s longtime personal assistant
Jupiter’s Legacy: The children of the first generation of superheroes have to live up to their parents’ legacy in this new series. Series premiere. Netflix
Dynasty: Alexis has some advice for Fallon’s wedding, not that Fallon asked, in the season premiere. 8 p.m., The CW
Magnum P.I.: Higgins is invited to join Doctors Without Borders in the season finale. WILL SHE ACCEPT? 8 p.m., CBS
Vax Live: Celebrities, royals, politicians, and musicians come together to educate and encourage people to get the damn vaccine already. 7 p.m., ABC & CBS; 10 p.m., Fox
Saturday Night Live: Elon Musk & Miley Cyrus 10:30 p.m., NBC
ELON MUSK. MILEY CYRUS.
THIS SATURDAY pic.twitter.com/6miGBj90XJ
— Saturday Night Live – SNL (@nbcsnl) May 7, 2021
Greenland: If you haven’t already had enough of the apocalypse, Gerard Butler and his family fight to get to the safety of Greenland as a “planet-killing” comet hurtles towards Earth in what is called by some critics, “an improbably entertaining time.” This is one of those movies that had the misfortune of opening last year, and I’d never heard of it until today, so who knows. 7 p.m., HBO
Watch What Happens Live: The Real Housekids of Bravo, because we know who the real stars of these shows are. 9 p.m., Bravo
Burning Little Lies: Not to be confused with Little Fires Everywhere. 7 p.m., Lifetime
Beware of Mom: HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY, EVERYONE! 7 p.m., LMN
- Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon (Friday): Jessica Biel, Chiara Aurelia, Nick Thune, Mad Foxes
- Watch What Happens Live (Sunday): The Real Housekids of Bravo, featuring Brielle Biermann, Riley Burruss, Frankie Catania, Briana Culberson, Gia Giudice, Albie & Chris Manzo, Brooks Marks, Shane Keough, Noelle Robinson, Avery Singer, Kairo Whitfield, Portia Umansky
|CBS||Kids Say the Darndest Things
|FOX||Friday Night Smackdown||Local|
|ABC||VAX LIVE: The Concert to Reunite the World||American Idol
|CBS||VAX LIVE: The Concert to Reunite the World||48 Hours||48 Hours||News/Local|
|Saturday Night Live
|Saturday Night Live
(Elon Musk & Miley Cyrus)
|ABC||America’s Funniest Home Videos
|CBS||60 Minutes||NCIS: Los Angeles
|NCIS: New Orleans
|The CW||Local||DC’s Legends of Tomorrow
|Bless the Harts
|The Great North
|NBC||American Ninja Warrior
|Zoey’s Extraordinary Playlist