It’s Friday and I am done with this week.
Oh, hey, are two potential hurricanes moving into the Gulf at the same time next week? SURE. OF COURSE. WHY SHOULD NEXT WEEK BE ANY BETTER THAN THIS SUCK WEEK?
Two tropical cyclones (could be tropical storms or hurricanes) will be in the Gulf of Mexico early next week. That will bring up talk of the Fujiwhara effect, a situation where the two nearby cyclonic vortices orbit each other and close the distance. Will be interesting to watch pic.twitter.com/jKAqwD9D1k
— James Spann (@spann) August 20, 2020
“The Fujiwhara effect.” Sure. Why not. On the upside, maybe my power will be knocked out and I won’t have to watch any of the Republican National Convention. (Segway!)
Political Crap
Last night was the fourth and final night for the Democratic National Convention, the big night in which Joe Biden officially accepted the nomination for President of the United States (oh, to have someone in the Oval Office who I can just call their actual name).
The wonderful and hilarious Julia Louis-Dreyfus, who of course played a fictional Veep, hosted the night and lent the entire event a bit of levity.
OH DAMN.
There were a few highlights of the night, including The Chicks’ beautiful performance of the National Anthem:
… the Right’s favorite target, Hunter Biden, unapologetically showing up to introduce his father and the Bidens’ charming grandaughters talking about how their grandfather calls them every day.
But the moment that most people will remember (besides Biden’s acceptance speech) was Brayden Harrington, a brave 13-year-old boy who connected with Joe Biden over their shared stutter. Please watch this if you missed it last night:
Aside from highlighting Joe Biden’s compassion towards this young man (and, you know, people in general), it also serves as such a sharp contrast to this disgraceful moment from the 2016 campaign:
There will be no stories about President Narcissistic Personality Disorder’s compassion towards individuals in next week’s convention because he has none. In fact, I’m willing to bet there will not be any people with disabilities featured at all — it would go against his particular pathology, he would never tolerate having something that he would consider “weakness” be associated with himself.
And that’s what made Biden’s speech so appealing last night: he’s the right person for this particular, terrible moment in American history. Nearly 180,000 Americans have died from this virus. That is a terrible number in and of itself, but now think about how many friends and family members are grieving those 180,000 individuals. Joe Biden, a man who has experienced unimaginable loss, understands and empathizes with every person who has lost a loved one in this crisis. In contrast, we currently have a President who claims he hasn’t cried since he was a baby, and when asked about his brother who died last week, only talked about how impressed his brother always was with him. He hasn’t mentioned him since.
Biden delivered a strong speech last night that was at times compassionate and other times angry at what this madman has done to our country. Throughout it all, Joe Biden was warm and steady and promised to offer light in the darkness that I know we all feel trapped in right now.
"Here and now, I give you my word: If you entrust me with the presidency, I will draw on the best of us, not the worst. I will be an ally of the light, not of the darkness."- Joe Biden
November 3rd #VOTE to DEFEAT THE DARK-SIDE#HelpUsJoeBiWan_YoureOurOnlyHope 🙏 pic.twitter.com/v6ZSQZe0LZ
— Mark Hamill (@HamillHimself) August 21, 2020
Also, he delivered his speech beautifully, swatting away the false narrative his opponents have been trying to write about cognitive impairment. Even Fox News personalities had to admit he did a great job — maybe because the dummies on the Trump campaign have inadvertently been lowering expectations for his performance for weeks. I mean, Steve Bannon getting arrested was pretty great yesterday, but for me, personally, watching the smile fall off of Dummy Jr.’s face when LAURA FUCKING INGRAHAM of all people tells him Biden exceeded expectations might be the highlight of my week:
Watch the smile disappear from Jr’s face as Laura Ingraham says Joe Biden exceeded expectations. It almost looks like he’s about to cry pic.twitter.com/p3XVncSOYZ
— Acyn Torabi (@Acyn) August 21, 2020
Delicious.
Oh and here’s President All the Best Words’ review:
In 47 years, Joe did none of the things of which he now speaks. He will never change, just words!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) August 21, 2020
So, what you’re saying is that Biden is making some good points and promising things that most Americans want from a President? Got it.
As for the virtual convention itself, I kinda loved it? Yes, there were moments of painful awkwardness:
But there was also amazingness:
But more importantly, the virtual nature of the convention sped the whole proceedings along. I’m sure the speakers miss the cheering crowds, but I, for one, did not miss the long delays the applause breaks create, nor did I miss all the blathering from the talking heads filling dead air between speakers. I dunno, guys, can we keep this format, maybe?
Going Viral
The Masked Singer has resumed production and this season, viewers will be able to vote for their favorite performances.
Here are all the shows that intend to address COVID-19 as part of their story this season.
Top Gear is inviting a “drive-in” audience for a taping in September.
There has been an outbreak (three cases) of COVID in Television City where The Young and the Restless, The Bold and the Beautiful and The Late Late Show with James Corden all tape. Terrific.
The Tony Awards will be presented virtually sometime this fall. They were originally supposed to be held in June.
Another baseball game has been postponed because players tested positive.
All Other TV News
Here’s the full first episode of Lovecraft Country in case you missed it:
Outlander is launching a four-part behind-the-scenes special on Facebook on Sunday.
Netflix is building a Stranger Things immersive drive-thru experience in Los Angeles which sounds pretty cool, though $59 per car seems steep.
Lori Loughlin’s husband was sentenced to five months in jail for the college admissions scandal. Aunt Becky learns her fate later today.
I would say this Gossip Girl fan has too much time on her hands, but I’ve been reposting my Lost blogs all summer and well, hi, Kettle, my name is Pot.
I remain furious that Netflix didn’t renew Marianne for a second season. FURIOUS.
Nick Cannon is trying to make nice with ViacomCBS after making those anti-Semitic comments in June.
Renewals
- RuPaul’s Drag Race, All Stars and Untucked have been renewed at VH1.
Cancellations
- Tosh.0 will end after this upcoming 12th season on Comedy Central.
In Development
- Sarah Cooper’s How to Be Successful Without Hurting Men’s Feelings is being turned into a comedy series at CBS.
- Moonbase 8, a comedy from Fred Armisen, Jonathan Krisel, Tim Heidecker, and John C. Reilly has landed at Showtime.
- Colin Quinn, Phoebe Robinson, and Aida Rodriguez are all getting stand-up specials at HBO Max.
- Candy Land, a competition series hosted by Kristin Chenoweth, is being made at Food Network.
- National Enquirer: The Untold Story! is being turned into a limited series.
- Hunted, Slaxx, and Lucky have all been bought by Shudder.
- Spin, a movie about a teen who discovers DJ culture, is coming to Disney+.
Casting News
- Suranne Jones and Rose Leslie have joined the BBC One miniseries, Vigil.
Mark Your Calendar
- The Boys in the Band will debut on Netflix on September 30.
- Warrior will return on Cinemax on October 2.
- Magical Girl Friendship Squad and Wild Life will both premiere on TZGZ on September 26.
- Love and Monsters will debut on VOD on October 16.
- Shudder has announced their “61 Days of Halloween” lineup.
R.I.P.
Chi Chi DeVayne, RuPaul’s Drag Race contestant
WATCH THIS
FRIDAY
Lucifer: Look who’s back. Season premiere. Netflix
RuPaul’s Drag Race: Vegas Revue: Mama Ru has a Vegas Revue! These are the showgirls I want to see put on a show. Series premiere. 7 p.m., VH1
Chemical Hearts: Lili Reinhart stars in this romantic film about two teens on a newspaper staff who fall in love. Amazon
Hoops: Jake Johnson stars as a foul-mouthed high school basketball coach in this new animated comedy. Series premiere. Netflix
SATURDAY
Love in the Time of Corona: A four-part limited series about couples trying to find a connection in this distanced moment we’re all living through right now. 7 p.m., Freeform
Queen & Slim: A young Black couple goes on the run when an encounter with the police goes wrong. I would say this movie was timely or prescient but the truth is it isn’t because racism is ALWAYS WITH US. Ugh. 7 p.m., HBO
SUNDAY
The Vow: A deep dive into the NXIVM cult. Series premiere. 9 p.m., HBO
NOS4A2: Vic takes another stand against Charlie Manx. Season finale. 9 p.m., AMC
The Chi: Emmett and Tiff move towards their future in the season finale. 8 p.m., Showtime
Yellowstone: The battle for the future of the Yellowstone heats up. Season finale. 8 p.m., Paramount
Elena of Avalor: Elena is coronated in the series finale. 6 p.m., Disney Junior
| FRI. | 7:00 | 7:30 | 8:00 | 8:30 | 9:00 | 9:30 |
| ABC | Shark Tank (repeat) |
20/20 |
| CBS | MacGyver (repeat) |
Magnum P.I. (repeat) |
Blue Bloods (repeat) |
| CW | Masters of Illusion (new) |
Masters of Illusion (repeat) |
Being Reuben (new) |
Being Reuben (new) |
Local |
| FOX | Friday Night Smackdown | Local |
| NBC | America’s Got Talent (repeat) |
Dateline |
—
| SAT. | 7:00 | 7:30 | 8:00 | 8:30 | 9:00 | 9:30 | 10:00 | 10:30 | 11:00 | 11:30 |
| ABC | NBA Playoff (live) |
News/Local |
| CBS | Magnum P.I. (repeat) |
48 Hours | 48 Hours | News/Local |
| FOX | Fox PBC Fight Night (live) |
News/Local |
| NBC | Stanley Cup Playoff (live) |
News/ Local |
Saturday Night Live (repeat) |
—
| SUN. | 6:00 | 6:30 | 7:00 | 7:30 | 8:00 | 8:30 | 9:00 | 9:30 |
| ABC | America’s Funniest Home Videos (repeat) |
Celebrity Family Feud (new) |
Press Your Luck (new) |
Match Game (new) |
| CBS | 60 Minutes | Big Brother (new) |
NCIS: Los Angeles (repeat) |
NCIS: New Orleans (repeat) |
| The CW | Local | Fridge Wars (new) |
Supernatural (repeat) |
Local |
| FOX | Last Man Standing (repeat) |
Duncan-ville (repeat) |
The Simp-sons (repeat) |
Bless the Harts (repeat) |
Bob’s Burgers (repeat) |
Family Guy (repeat) |
Local/News |
| NBC | Cannonball (new) |
Stanley Cup Playoff (live) |