Breathe.
This is Cuzco. He wanted to remind you to breathe. Thought he'd provide a demonstration just in case. 13/10 thank you Cuzco (TT: cuzco.the.golden)
Here’s A BUNCH OF TV News
You’re going to be waiting until at least 2027 for season three of The Last of Us.
This is some good news: the clever comedian Josh Johnson has been promoted to The Daily Show anchor rotation beginning tomorrow.
We have our first look at the Golden Bachelorettes who will appear on Mel Owen’s Golden Bachelor season — that is, if he’s still the Golden Bachelor after his comments about not dating any woman over 60. Ironically, or perhaps intentionally, there is only one woman under 60 in the entire group. Good luck, Mel!
The Sopranos refused to share their meatballs with the Sex and the City ladies.
Isaac Hayes’s son says that his father did not quit South Park of his own volition, but that leaders within Scientology did so on his behalf: “Those decisions about his involvement in the show, his leaving the show, were made by those people and not him,” Hayes III tells Cracked. “He would have never quit that show. He loved that show, and he was making a lot of money doing that show.”
Pee Wee’s bike has finally arrived at its real home: The Alamo.
One of the stories that I didn’t mention last week because the Stephen Colbert outrage sucked all the air out of the room was the one where the Wall Street Journal — the same Wall Street Journal owned by Rupert Murdoch — revealed that President Pervert sent Jeffrey Epstein a birthday note that contained a sketch of a naked woman, and a weird imagined conversation between the two of them about “secrets” and that his signature made up the woman’s pubic hair.
President Freak Out has done what he do: he’s sued the Dow Jones, News Corp, Rupert Murdoch, and two Wall Street Journal reporters for $20 billion over the story. The Wall Street Journal is, for the time being, not backing down: “We have full confidence in the rigor and accuracy of our reporting, and will vigorously defend against any lawsuit.”
The Wall Street Journal story has put Fox News in an awkward position, as both entities are owned by the Murdochs. Hence, the story disappearing over on Laura Ingraham’s show.
There was a mention from Ingraham suggesting that she would be discussing the new reporting from the WSJ after the commercial break but unless I missed it, the WSJ was not mentioned again after this moment. pic.twitter.com/Xk5OysxYuV
— Acyn (@Acyn) July 18, 2025
You know how badly President Sex Crimes wants this Jeffrey Epstein story to go away? He wants it to go away so badly, he admitted he has a health issue to try to distract us.
You know how badly President Malignant Racist wants this Jeffrey Epstein story to go away? He wants it to go away so badly, he’s screaming at NFL and MLB teams to try to distract us.
You know how badly President January 6th wants this Jeffrey Epstein story to go away? He wants it to go away so badly, they’re making up nonsense about President Obama having committed treason to try to distract us.
Oh, but here’s an interesting story about the Epstein files: one thousand FBI agents were tasked with combing over hundreds of thousands of documents in the case to look for President Secret’s name. Huh!
Meanwhile, a judge has thrown out one of President Litigious’ frivolous lawsuits against journalist Bob Woodward, so stay strong, Wall Street Journal. Please don’t cave like ABC, CBS, and all the rest.
Over the weekend, the outpouring of support for Stephen Colbert continued:
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Renewals
- Vanderpump Villa has been renewed for a third season on Hulu.
Cancellations
- Blue’s Clues and You was canceled back in 2023 with no announcement after four seasons on Nickelodeon.
In Development
- She’s Making a List, starring Lacey Chabert and Andrew Walker, is in the works at Hallmark Channel.
- Variety, a K-Pop drama, is in the works at Netflix.
Casting News
- Callum Vinson has been cast as Jason Voorhees in Crystal Lake on Peacock.
- Bridget Moynahan will guest star on Boston Blue on CBS.
- Poorna Jagannathan and Gary Carr have joined the adaptation of the Lars Keppler novels at Apple TV+.
- Len Cariou, Sean ‘Dino’ Johnson, Andrea Jones-Sojola, Johnny Mckeown, Billy Eugene Jones, Joseph Morales, Matt McGrath, Phillip Johnson Richardson, Terry Walters, and Yaegel T. Welch have joined American Classic on MGM+.
- Mehcad Brooks is leaving Law & Order on NBC.
- Michael Bradway is leaving Chicago Fire on NBC.
- Eric Graise and Abby McEnany are leaving Tracker on CBS.
- Sofia Mattson has left General Hospital on ABC.
- Will Kulp is leaving Southern Hospitality on Bravo.
Mark Your Calendar
- The Phoenician Scheme will begin streaming on Peacock on July 25.
- Truck Dynasty will premiere on Discovery on August 12.
- Canelo Álvarez vs. Terence Crawford will live stream on Netflix on September 13.
- Final Draft debuts on Netflix on August 12.
- Love Is Blind will return on Netflix on October 1.
- Perfect Match will return on Netflix on August 1.
- Selling the OC will return on Netflix on November 12.
- Owning Manhattan will return on Netflix on December 5.
- Gilmore Girls will begin airing on Hallmark Channel on August 25.
- Bobby’s Triple Threat returns on Food Network and HBO Max on September 2.
R.I.P.
Eileen Fulton, As the World Turns actress
Tom Troupe, Screen and stage actor who appeared in My Own Private Idaho, Star Trek, Cagney & Lacey, and Mission: Impossible, among others
Judy Loe, British actress known for her work in The Chief and Casualty, and mother of actress Kate Beckinsale
Alan Bergman, Oscar-winning song lyricist who co-wrote “The Way We Were” and theme songs for Good Times, Maude, and Alice
Felix Baumgartner, Austrian extreme adventurer who is best known for parajumping from the stratosphere
Robbie Pardlo, Singer in the R&B group City High
WATCH THIS
The Hunting Wives: Brittany Snow stars in this new thriller series as a newcomer to East Texas, where she falls into a clique of housewives harboring deadly secrets. Netflix
Trophy Wife: Murder on Safari: This docuseries explores the murder of Bianca Rudolph, the wife of a wealthy dentist, while the two were on safari. Hulu
Justice on Trial: Judge Judy looks back at 8 landmark cases and questions whether the courts got them right in this new series. Prime Video
Late Night:
- Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon: Adam Sandler, Sabrina Ionescu, Jessie Murph
- Late Night with Seth Meyers: Peter Dinklage, Jerrod Carmichael
- The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: Sandra Oh, Dave Franco
- Jimmy Kimmel Live: Pedro Pascal, Vanessa Kirby, Ebon Moss-Bachrach, Joseph Quinn, Pamela Adlon, guest host Alan Cumming
- The Daily Show: Jon Stewart host, guest TBA
- Watch What Happens Live: Meg Stalter, Tracee Ellis Ross
| MON. | 7:00 | 7:30 | 8:00 | 8:30 | 9:00 | 9:30 |
| ABC | Bachelor in Paradise (new) |
Celebrity Family Feud (repeat) |
| CBS | The Neighbor-hood (repeat) |
The Neighbor-hood (repeat) |
FBI (repeat) |
FBI: Most Wanted (repeat) |
| CW | Penn & Teller: Fool Us (repeat) |
Whose Line Is It Anyway? (repeat) |
Whose Line Is It Anyway? (repeat) |
Local |
| FOX | LEGO Masters (new) |
The Quiz With Balls (new) |
News/Local |
| NBC | American Ninja Warrior (new) |
Survival Mode (new) |