The Golden Marriage has already ended in Golden Divorce (who could have possibly golden predicted?)

by Therese Odell, posted in watch this

Where’s the Benny Hill music, though?

Here’s A BUNCH OF TV News

Oh, who could have possibly predicted that the Golden Marriage was a Golden Failure after their Golden Announcement less than two weeks ago that they weren’t Golden Living together?

And to think, I never wrote up my recap of the wedding …

Look. Listen. When I introduced y’all to the Golden Bachelor contestants, I gave extra weight to the women who lived within two hours of Gerry, because these are grown-ass adults with grown-ass children who are not going to be willing to pick up their lives and move to God knows where to be with a man they just met. If nothing else, Love is Blind has taught me that MOST people including 20-somethings are not inclined to do so, so why would a 65-year-old? So when Illinois Gerry chose New Jersey Teresa, it seemed … like a bad idea. And the lesson here is don’t marry someone on national TV after only knowing them for 6 months, PARTICULARLY if you are eligible for Medicare.

Anyway, they better not make Teresa the Golden Bachelorette, not when Susan, Kathy, April, Sandra, Edith, and Natascha are still out there in the world.

In the past 24 hours, Conan O’Brien has managed to roast his parent streamer Max; be so good on Hot Ones that no one will ever be able to live up to it and they might as well cancel it; and remind us all that Norm Macdonald was the GOAT.

Freddie Highmore regrets not exploring Vancouver more while filming The Good Doctor but I’m here to tell him if he’s going to be on another TV show in the future, he’ll get his chance.

Gina Carano still doesn’t get it.

You won’t have Showtime’s standalone app to not watch anymore. It’s shutting down on April 30, so go sign up for Paramount+ if you want that content.

Got a Roku account? Your data may have been compromised so go change those passwords.

Renewals

In Development

Casting News

  • Marc Maron will co-star in the Owen Wilson golf comedy on Apple TV+.
  • Paula Patton will guest star in Murder in a Small Town on Fox.

Mark Your Calendar

  • Bodkin returns on Netflix on May 9.
  • The Upshaws returns on Netflix on April 18.
  • Supacell will premiere on Netflix in June.
  • The 8 Show will premiere on Netflix on May 17.
  • The Real Housewives of Dubai returns on Bravo on June 2.
  • Royal Rules of Ohio will premiere on Freeform on May 15.
  • Kiss the Future will debut on Paramount+ on May 7.
  • The Stranger debuts on Hulu on April 15.

R.I.P.

Simon Murray, International TV analyst

WATCH THIS

FRIDAY

Franklin: Michael Douglass stars as Benjamin Franklin in this new limited series which has nothing to do with the incredibly irritating cartoon turtle. Series premiere. Apple TV+

Good Times: Norman Lear’s beloved sitcom returns as an animated series. Series premiere. Netflix

A Strange Way of Life: Pedro Pascal and Ethan Hawke star in this Pedro Almodóvar short film about two Old West gunslingers with a … complicated relationship ~wink~ Premiere Netflix

SATURDAY

Saturday Night Live: Ryan Gosling & Chris Stapleton 10:30 p.m., NBC

Fast Times at Ridgemont High: Cameron Crowe’s first great movie. 9:15 p.m., Sundance TV

Almost Famous: Cameron Crowe’s last great movie. I said what I said. 5 p.m., Showtime Showcase

SUNDAY

The Sympathizer: A satirical thriller about a communist spy during the Vietnam War who learns his spying days aren’t over in his new life as a refugee in Los Angeles. Series premiere.  8 p.m., HBO

Bluey: The Sign: It’s the longest episode of Bluey ever! Premiere. Disney+, Disney Channel, Disney Junior

Billy Joel at Madison Square Garden: Billy Joel plays his 100th performance at Madison Square Garden. 8 p.m., CBS

Late Night:

  • Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon (Friday): Jesse Eisenberg, Susie Essman, Nathan Macintosh
  • Watch What Happens Live (Sunday): Jasmine Ellis Cooper, Summer Marie Thomas

FRI. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC Shark Tank
(new)		 20/20
CBS S.W.A.T.
(new)		 Fire Country
(new)		 Blue Bloods
(new)
CW Penn & Teller: Fool Us
(new)		 Sight Unseen
(new)		 Local
FOX Friday Night Smackdown Local
NBC Password
(repeat)		 Dateline

—

SAT. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30 10:00 10:30 11:00 11:30
ABC NHL Hockey
(live)		 News/Local
CBS So Help Me Todd
(repeat)		 48 Hours 48 Hours News/Local
CW I Am Heath Ledger Local
FOX United Football League
(live)		 News/Local
NBC The Wall
(repeat)		 Weakest Link
(repeat)		 Saturday Night Live
(repeat)		 News/
Local		 Saturday Night Live
(Ryan Gosling & Chris Stapleton)

—

SUN. 6:00 6:30 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC America’s Funniest Home Videos
(new)		 American Idol
(new)
CBS 60 Minutes Tracker
(new)		 The 100th: Billy Joel At Madison Square Garden – The Greatest Arena Run Of All Time
(new)
The CW 10 Things I Hate About You The Conners
(repeat)		 The Conners
(repeat)		 Local
FOX Next Level Chef
(repeat)		 The Simpsons
(repeat)		 The Great North
(new)		 Grimsburg
(new)		 Local/News
NBC Password
(repeat)		 The Voice
(repeat)		 Dateline
(new)

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