foolish watcher

Do not fuck with Nancy.

Therese Odell
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Impeachment Corner!

Hi hello hi! Do you feel different today? A little lighter, a little less just pissed off? Yeah, that’s because, as promised back in November 2018, the House impeached the motherfucker.

After hours and hours of “debate” where the Republicans compared President Abuse of Power to Jesus and demanded a moment of silence for the 63 million Trump voters whom the Democrats were “trying to silence” — you know, kinda like the 65.8 million voters whom the Electoral College actually silenced — the vote came down strictly party lines, with that asshole Tulsi Gabbard voting “present,” and a couple of other Democrats voting no because they’re cowards.

But it’s done and headed to the Senate now where the Republicans are ready and waiting to acquit President Obstruction.

Yeah, turns out, Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi, she’s not handing over the impeachment, not just yet. See, Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell, this obstructionist piece of shit, he’s been going around proudly and loudly talking about how he’s been working with the White House to arrange a sham trial to exonerate President Will Forever Be Impeached. In response, Minority Leader Chuck Schumer has demanded a fair trial with witnesses and documents — you know, LIKE A TRIAL, but Mitch McConnell has been all, “Yeah, nah.”

So, then, there’s this Constitutional scholar — the guy who literally wrote the book on Constitutional Law — Lawrence Tribe, who has been saying, “You know, there is no timetable for when the House has to turn over the impeachment to the Senate. In theory, the House could just hang on to the impeachment while other investigations continue or courts rule that witnesses do, in fact, have to testify.”

Nancy Pelosi:

So following the House vote last night, Nancy Pelosi had a press conference where she explained that they would not be handing the impeachment over to the Senate, not until they make perfectly clear how this trial is going to go. Her reasoning is that she has to appoint House Managers to the trial — basically prosecutors that will explain the House’s case for their articles of impeachment. But she can’t make that decision until she knows what the trial is going to look like. She isn’t doing anything until she knows that the trial is going to be fair — or exactly the opposite of what Mitch McConnell is promising.

And if that has the additional benefit of making The First President to Be Impeached in His First Term’s head explode, well, that’s just an added benefit.

By the way, his head is totally exploding:

LOLOLOLOL.

Lindsey Graham, who just this weekend repeated that he had no intention of being a fair or impartial juror in an impeachment trial — otherwise known as performing his Constitutional duty — is now getting his panties in a twist over Constitutional propriety:

And Mitch MotherFucking McConnell — the man who held up a nominee for the Supreme Court for nearly a year because he didn’t want Obama to have an appointment — this shitbird, he’s ACTUALLY WHINGING ABOUT PELOSI HOLDING THIS UP FOR POLITICAL REASONS, SAYING THAT THE DEMOCRATS ARE DESTROYING INSTITUTIONS, AND WORRYING ABOUT PARTISANSHIP!

Look, the bottom line is that the House will turn over the impeachment to the Senate soon enough. Holding onto it indefinitely undermines the Democrats’ argument that they needed to expedite the impeachment because President CheeseyPoof was threatening the election. But in the meantime, Nancy Pelosi and the Democrats get to rent some space out in the Republicans’ heads for free, give some moderate Republicans a little time to see that their Senate leadership is a fucking joke, and push the Piece-of-Trash-in-Chief a little bit farther over the edge.

Point: Nancy.

In Other TV News

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Late Night:

 

THUR 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC Disney’s Prep & Landing Disney’s Prep & Landing 2 The Great American Baking Show
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CBS Young Sheldon
(repeat)		 The Unicorn
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NBC Miss America 2020
(new)		 Gwen Stefani’s You Make it Feel Like Christmas
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