foolish watcher

The Goldens are going to mix it up with the Bachelors and Bachelorettes in Paradise. So how’s that going to work?

Therese Odell
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What’s wrong, Rio? I mean, besides our national security leaders using apps to text each other war plans and including randos in the conversation and the President claiming he has no idea what is going on and the Social Security department being stripped for parts and students being deported for protesting and other folks being deported because they have tattoos and the administration telling courts “FIGHT ME, BRO” and the intimidation of law firms and lawyers and universities and private businesses and Greenland for some reason and stripping our environment of all its protections while also gutting NOAA and eliminating FEMA at the same time while also destroying the Department of Education? I mean, besides all that? Everything is fine, Rio. Just peachy.

@thebluerio

what’s wrong? HUH? #indianringneck #iloveyou #fyp #funnyparrot

♬ original sound – The Blue Rio

Here’s A BUNCH OF TV News

Looks like Amazon is putting James Bond into the hands of the folks who handled Spider-Man and Harry Potter.

Netflix has released some of Owen Cooper‘s audition tape for Adolescence, because he’s just that remarkable:

Speaking of, please leave the cast of Adolescence alone. Especially the kids.

And one more thing while we’re at it, can you stop calling Aaron Paul “bitch?” That’d be great.

So which show is more successful at creating couples, Love is Blind or The Bachelor? Swoon does the math.

Yep, the Golden Bachelor/ette contestants are joining Paradise this summer along with the kids, so how’s that going to work? Will they date each other? Will they just date among their own age groups? Will they serve as mentors? Will they provide them chairs during the rose ceremonies? I need answers! (See Casting below.)

The kids are spending more time on social media than with television and movies.

Also, on average we’re spending $69 a month on four streaming services, and we are pretty sure that’s too damn much.

Jenny McCarthy is out here spilling Barbara Walters’ not-very-well-hidden secrets.

Wait, Coyote vs. Acme might see the light of day after all?

So, we can just compete in any category we want now? Huh.

Oh my God, “rawdogging” on planes IS Puddy’s fault:

The New York Times considers why TV presidents are so “weird” all of a sudden. I have a couple of theories.

#MeToo

Oh hi! It’s been a few weeks since I’ve talked about these disgusting sex pests, but, sadly, it’s time to get back to all the harassment and assault because it never goes away.

Impractical Jokers’ Joe Gatto has been accused by multiple women of inappropriate behavior. He denies the allegations.

This is your reminder that Stephen Collins, the star of Seventh Heaven, has never been charged with allegedly sexually assaulting three children, he went on to marry a woman 40 years younger than him, a self-described “superfan.” Gross.

H’oh boy. So Kanye West recorded a song with Sean “Diddy” Combs, his son, Christian, Jasmine Williams, and Kanye’s 11-year-old daughter, North. Kim Kardashian was understandably pissed about this, and sent out a cease and desist, but Kanye released the single anyway.

And if having your preteen daughter on a track with an accused sex monster wasn’t bad enough, apparently, Kim had to retrieve North from Kanye’s house after security guards let her know the Tate brothers were on their way over. Reportedly, Kim Kardashian is considering asking a judge to rescind their joint custody order. GEE, WHY?

Sean Combs is now being accused of forcing labor by demanding his staff have sex with him.

Now, listen. I firmly believe Sean Combs is an abusive, drugging, raping piece of shit, so don’t get confused when I tell you I also think it’s kinda hilarious that Tony Buzbee had to withdraw from more than a dozen lawsuits he’s filed against Combs because he’s not barred in New York State. Sir! YOU KNEW YOU COULDN’T BRING THESE LAWSUITS, SO WHY DID YOU DO IT? Narcissists, man.

Puddle of Mudd’s Wes Scantlin has been arrested for felony domestic violence.

Former Dodgers star Julio Urias has been suspended for half a season for violating the MLB’s domestic violence policy.

Republican Minnesota state senator Justin Eichorn was arrested for trying to hire a teenager for sex. This asshole spent the morning trying to get “Trump Derangement Syndrome” officially classified as a mental illness before moving on to the whole soliciting who he thought was a 17-year-old girl.

Fox News has been removed from a lawsuit brought by a former producer who claimed they ignored the fact that she was being raped by reporter Ed Henry.

Neil Gaiman is out here calling his accuser a “fantasist,” and provided text messages to try to prove it.

The state of Florida has opened an investigation into the Tate brothers now that they’re back in America thanks to President Rapist.

And then there are the lesser-known Alexander brothers.

Alexander Westwood‘s survivor bravely told her story to Deadline in excruciating detail. Here’s hoping she finds a way to heal.

Molly Ringwald has some mixed feelings about being John Hughes’ muse now that she’s an adult, and who can blame her?

Julia Stiles opened up about Harvey Weinstein making her feel “slimy” on the set of “Down to You” when he made her dance on the pool table for Freddie Prinze Jr.

So, Jason Isaacs was asked about that nude flash on The White Lotus a few weeks ago, and whether or not he used a prosthetic. And instead of just answering the question, he got all weird and defensive and decided to bring Mikey Madison’s “vulva” into it:

“A lot of people are debating it. It’s all over the internet,” Isaacs said on “CBS Mornings” when asked if his full frontal nude scene featured a prosthetic or not. “And it’s interesting because the best actress this year is Mikey Madison at the Oscars. And I don’t see anybody discussing her vulva, which was on [the screen] all the time.”

“It’s interesting that there’s a double standard for men,” he continued. “But when women are naked, Margaret Qualley as well, in ‘The Substance,’ nobody would dream of talking to her about her genitalia or her nipples or any of those things. So, its odd that there’s a double standard.”

First of all, the idea that people don’t talk about female nudity is the most preposterous and tone-deaf thing I’ve ever heard. Secondly, sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but Ms. Madison’s “vulva” was not on display in Anora once, much less “all the time.” Anyway, Jason Isaacs wants you to know he’s very sorry about saying such a weird thing.

Good news: Chris Cuomo is still awful. Oh! And so is Bill Maher! Just the worst! Oh, and Don Lemon claims he was sexually harassed at CNN.

Gwenyth Paltrow doesn’t understand intimacy coordinators. Maybe she should talk to Ellen Pompeo about why they are necessary.

Jonathan Majors is on a redemption campaign — just as an audio recording of him apparently admitting to assaulting his ex-girlfriend came out. Here’s a timeline of his entire story.

Cate Blanchett is pissed that the whole #MeToo movement lost its momentum and that we are nowhere near equal pay. Preach.

Following the recent suicide of Korean actress Kim Sae-ron, a huge scandal has unfolded in that country involving her mistreatment by the industry and a fellow Korean star and just how cruel the Korean culture is towards performers in general.

Sarah Wynn-Williams, the former director of global public policy at Facebook, is claiming she was fired for raising concerns about multiple sexual harassment allegations against a top executive, Joel Kaplan.

Martin Fustes, a writer on the British soap opera Emmerdale, has been fired after admitting to assaulting his girlfriend. ITV also pulled the show from consideration at the BAFTAs.

So now Jason Baldoni and his current publicist are suing his former publicist.

People tried to act like there was some sort of bad blood between Blake Lively and Anna Kendrick, because at a South by Southwest red carpet event, Kendrick was asked by a reporter what it was like to work with Lively. Kendrick, clearly irritated by the question, answered, “Oh, you know,” and the Jason Baldoni apologists ran with this, claiming that Kendrick dislikes her co-star. I read it the press loving nothing more than pitting women against each other and as Kendrick being annoyed at a reporter clearly trying to start shit and drag her into the whole mess. Anyway, the whole thing is a non-story and people should use their critical thinking skills. Grow up.

Renewals

In Development

Casting News

Mark Your Calendars

R.I.P.

Theo Kingma, Former president of the HFPA

Eddie Jordan, BBC racing commentator

Alex Wheatle, Author of the Crongton Knights books

WATCH THIS

The Cleaning Lady: Ramona still has cards to play even with the FBI sniffing around. Spring premiere. 7 p.m., Fox

Alert: Missing Persons Unit: A collegiate women’s rowing team goes missing during practice in the season premiere. 8 p.m., Fox

The Irrational: Alec and Rose are pulled into the dangerous world of international espionage. Season finale. 9 p.m., NBC

Bad Romance: Second season premiere. 9 p.m., ABC

Late Night:

TUES. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC Will Trent
(new)		 The Rookie
(new)		 Bad Romance
(new)
CBS FBI
(new)		 Watson
(repeat)		 Watson
(repeat)
CW WWE NXT
(new)		 Local
FOX The Cleaning Lady
(new)		 Alert: Missing Persons Unit
(new)		 News/Local
NBC St. Denis Medical
(new)		 Night Court
(new)		 Deal or No Deal Island
(new)		 The Irrational
(new)
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