foolish watcher

What if Former President Insurrectionist announced he was running for President again … and no one cared?

Therese Odell
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If you will excuse me, I have to go back to Miami immediately.

@christiangabriellopez

@Zoo Miami such a cute exhibit

♬ original sound – Christian Lopez

Here’s A BUNCH OF TV News

This happened yesterday:

That’s correct: as threatened repeatedly, Former President Traitor announced he was running for President again and the collective response was … “Eh.” Or, rather, worse than that, some mocked, including formerly dependable allies of the Former Liar-in-Chief:

The Washington Examiner called him a “three-time loser” and demanded that Republicans must “say no” to him.

The Wall Street Journal has been running editorials begging Republicans to pick anyone but the Former President Florida Man.

But even more devastatingly, Rupert Murdoch’s New York Post did this:

And here’s the entire hilarious article:

 

Notably, CNN and Fox News — yes, Fox News — cut away from the announcement as Former President Narcissistic Personality Disorder rambled on so long that his security had to prevent people from leaving.

Even Ivanka has announced that she will not be involved in her father’s campaign. 

After last week’s disappointing midterms in which most of the Former Cheeto-in-Chief’s handpicked candidates lost, many Republicans are looking to free themselves of his grip on the party. He’s just not a winner! He lost the popular vote in 2016 by 3 million votes; he lost the 2018 midterms; he lost the 2020 election by 7 million votes; and he’s largely responsible for the 2022 midterm losses.

And that is putting aside all of the legal trouble he is in: the Department of Justice continues to investigate his taking of top secret documents and the events of January 6;  the January 6th Committee continues to investigate him; he is still being investigated by Georgia for possible election fraud, oath of office violations, conspiracy, and racketeering in his attempt to steal the 2020 election; the Trump Organization has been hit with criminal charges in New York; and he’s being sued for defamation by E. Jean Carroll after he called her a liar when she claimed he raped her in the 1990s.

But he still has a weirdly loyal cult-like base which makes him dangerous to the GOP: if he wins the nomination, it will be 2020 all over again but this time high on meth; if he loses the nomination to someone like Ron DeSantis, he will try to burn the entire party down. In that event, it’s likely Former President Tin Foil Hat would run as an independent, peeling away a third of the Republican voting block. The Republicans can’t afford to run him and they can’t afford to not run him.

I’m not gullible enough to think he can’t win again — 2016 scarred me. But, buoyed by the results of the midterms, I remain cautiously optimistic that this country was so traumatized by the chaos of his presidency that we will not allow that to happen to us again. In the meantime, let the GOP fight it out while we pray that Merrick Garland finally gets around to DOING SOMETHING.

The backlash to Candace Cameron Bure’s comments about appearing on GAC because it focuses on “traditional” families — i.e., heterosexual couples — continues to receive backlash: The president and CEO of GLAAD called her comments “irresponsible and hurtful”:

JoJo Siwa said it is “rude and hurtful to a whole community of people”;

And on that post, Cameron Bure’s former Full House and Fuller House co-star, Jodie Sweetin responded to Siwa by saying, “You know I love you ❤️❤️.”

Brendan Fraser will not be returning to the Golden Globes after being fondled by former president Phillip Berk, thankyouverymuch.

Also, Brendan Fraser is a mensch, but I feel like we already knew that.

You can finally kick people off of your Netflix account.

DC’s Stargirl filmed two endings for season three: one as the series finale which will be used; the other in the improbable event that a fourth season was ordered. This bums me out, thinking about all the creatives at The CW who saw what was coming and could do nothing about it except try to end their shows on their own terms, while hoping at the same time that it wasn’t coming to an end.

Denise Richards and her quack husband Aaron Phypers were shot at in a road rage incident in Los Angeles. They are both fine.

Jon Stewart responded to the Dave Chappelle/SNL commentary to say, “I don’t believe that censorship and penalties are the way to end antisemitism or to gain understanding. I think it’s the wrong way to approach it.”

It’s a point, but not one I agree with —  no one is censoring Chappelle. He will put out more comedy specials, and go on tour, and he hosted Saturday Night Live after being an unapologetic transphobe for fuck’s sake. While I respect Jon Stewart, I can also recognize that he is another man of a certain age who seems to think the world is trying to silence other men of a certain age, to which I say, “IF ONLY.”

Zoë Kravitz has just put the hope for a third season of Big Little Lies out of its misery. Not gonna happen.

Johnny Depp and Vanessa Paradis’ daughter has some thoughts about nepotism if you give a single shit.

The producers of The Walking Dead have served AMC with a new breach of contract lawsuit for $200 million.

Paramount is starting its own round of layoffs. And Warner Bros. Discovery is still out here firing people.

Apple has released the details and prices for their MLS Soccer plan if you care.

Renewals

Cancellations

In Development

Casting News

Mark Your Calendars

 

R.I.P.

Dan Lembo, Survivor: Nicaragua contestant

WATCH THIS

Fleischman’s In Trouble: Jesse Eisenberg and Claire Danes star in this dramedy about a man struggling to get back into the Manhattan dating scene following his divorce, which is further hampered when his ex-wife disappears leaving his two young daughters with him. Series premiere. Hulu

The Wonder: Florence Pugh stars in this psychological drama as a nineteenth-century English nurse who investigates a young girl who claims she hasn’t eaten in months in what could be a medical anomaly or possible miracle. Premiere. Netflix

Limitless with Chris Hemsworth: Chris Hemsworth is out here making a whole docuseries about his “personal journey” to combat aging and unlock the “full potential” of the human body. STEP ONE: Be an impossibly hot Australian. Series premiere. Disney+

The Santa Clauses: Tim Allen and Elizabeth Mitchell star in this new series based on The Santa Clause movies, in which Santa searches for his replacement. Series premiere. Disney+

Late Night:

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FOX The Masked Singer
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NBC Chicago Med
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