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- Ryan Murphy has made it clear that he’s not going to be straight with us about what this next season of American Horror Story is going to be about, but, seriously, Ryan Murphy, what the hell are we supposed to do with these newest trailers which are just all over the place? Creature from the Black Lagoon? Aliens? Nosferatu? WHAT IS IT?
- Good news, fsociety: Mr. Robot was picked up for a third mumbly, baffling season.
- I’m not saying that it’s a good thing that The Nightly Show with Larry Wilmore was canceled, it was a perfectly alright show that I forgot to watch. I’m just saying that Comedy Central now has a chance to give Jessica Williams the late night news show that she should have had in the first place.
- Oh wow, the chair of NBC Bob Greenblatt just posted this about Donald Trump on his personal facebook page: “The sad state of affairs thanks to a pompous businessman turned reality TV star (whose show consistently ran LAST in its time period, by the way) who thinks speaking his mind is refreshing. It’s actually corrosive and toxic because his ‘mind’ is so demented; and his effect will unfortunately linger long after he’s been told to get off the stage.” SAD!
- John Krasinski is your new Jack Ryan.
- And Jill Soloway — the woman who gave us Transparent — is now working on a musical comedy for Amazon.
- I know what it looks like, but I’m pretty sure this actually means Daryl is safe. Unless they’re reverse-reverse psychologing us, which would be some bullshit.
- Singularity, a sci-fi comedy from Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg, has landed at FX.
- Oh, God, HBO might be giving Pizzolatto a “Perry Mason” drama and it will star Robert Downey Jr. and can we just count all the ways this will be a disaster? Also, why is Robert Downey Jr. wearing ladies sunglasses in that picture?
- Lifetime is working on a psychological thriller based on Shakespeare’s A Midsummer Night’s Dream called — wait for it — A Midsummer’s Nightmare. Clever.
- Hulu is going to be your place to watch Community and all those WGN dramas from here on out.
- First he loses his childhood home in Katrina and now Wendell Pierce has lost his Baton Rouge home in these most recent Louisiana floods. Our thoughts are with everyone in Louisiana right now.
WATCH THIS
- Toddlers & Tiaras: Break out your lacey ankle socks and Pixie Stix/Mountain Dew combos: After a Honey Boo Boo-induced hiatus, the exploitative show about kiddie beauty pageants is back! Season premiere. 7 p.m., TLC
- Elvis Lives!: The geniuses who gave us Sharknado bring us this movie in which Elvis never died, and in fact is alive and well and fighting crime. 8 p.m., AXS
- Late Night: The Daily Show: Yaa Gyasi
| TUES. | 7:00 | 7:30 | 8:00 | 8:30 | 9:00 | 9:30 |
| ABC | Bachelor in Paradise (new) |
After Paradise (live) |
The Middle (repeat) |
Fresh Off the Boat (repeat) |
| CBS | NCIS (repeat) |
Zoo (new) |
NCIS: New Orleans (repeat) |
| CW | The Flash (repeat) |
MadTV (repeat) |
Local |
| FOX | Brooklyn Nine-Nine (repeat) |
New Girl (repeat) |
Luicfer (repeat) |
News/Local |
| NBC | The Olympics (live) |