foolish watcher

Lock him up! Lock him up!

Therese Odell
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GIVE THE GOOD BOY HIS SOY SAUCE.

WELP, HE GOT INDICTED AGAIN.

Before we get to today’s TV news, we have to acknowledge the fourth (and last? for now?) indictment against Former President Emoluments that was just brought down by a Fulton County grand jury in Georgia. And they may have just saved the best for last. Former President “I Just Want to Find 11,780 Votes” and 18 co-defendants, including Rudy Giuliani, Mark Meadows, Jenna Ellis, and Sidney Powell, have been charged with forty-one counts (13 for Former President Traitor), including 161 overt acts of racketeering under the RICO act for attempting to subvert the 2020 election results in Georgia.

There’s a lot in this indictment, including more information on the whole false electors scheme. But more damning perhaps is the infamous “find votes” call to the Georgia Secretary of State Brad Raffensperger, and, apparently, some tampering with voting machines post-election.

Additionally, there’s already some fear in the Former President Dingus’ camp that the co-defendants could turn on him to save themselves — something that could also be used in the federal January 6th case that Jack Smith brought against him.

But what makes this indictment more hopeful than the previous three leveled against him is that it is a state charge — and in a state where the governor does not have pardon power. (It’s a long story, but basically, a former governor of Georgia — a Ku Klux Klan member at that — brazenly sold pardons to the highest bidder, and so the residents of Georgia altered their constitution to strip governors of the power.)

So if Former President RICO gets convicted, there’s essentially fuckall the governor can do about it (besides go to the parole board and plead for leniency on his behalf, I guess). In contrast, if Former President 91 Charges is convicted in federal court, a Republican president could come along and pardon him one day — and probably will.

But don’t think about that! Instead, focus on a couple of other delightful things about this particular case: 1. there is a chance it will be televised, and 2. the Fulton County sheriff has already made it clear that Former President Adderall will be treated like any other detainee.

And yes, I did enjoy yesterday’s news with another glass of bubbly.

I can imagine someone else was out there enjoying some champagne, too.

Here’s A BUNCH OF TV News

For the first time ever, broadcast TV dropped below 50% in overall TV viewing during the month of July. Streaming ticked up to 38.7%, marking its highest share to date. But can you guess which service has the largest share of the streaming pie? It might surprise You(Tube).

Johnny Hardwick, the voice of Dale on King of the Hill, recorded “a couple” of episodes for the revival of the series on Hulu before his untimely death last week.

The creators of The O.C. say that they immediately regretted killing off Marissa, but that they were under a lot of pressure to kill a major character.

Did a Ted Lasso director essentially confirm that there will be spinoffs? And why can’t we get a straight answer from anyone as to whether or not this series is over? What’s all the secrecy about?

Paris Hilton and her family were photographed vacationing on Maui this week and … yeaaaaah … not a great look.

Congratulations to Ashley Olsen and husband Louis Eisner!

#MeToo

After the cast of Days of Our Lives created a petition demanding that disgraced producer and director Albert Alarr be removed after multiple complaints, Alarr was finally replaced with producer Janet Drucker. After being replaced, Alarr released a petulant statement claiming that this all stemmed “from the animus of just two individuals.” Dateline reports that they spoke to a dozen current and former Days of Our Lives employees who corroborated the stories that Alarr created a toxic work environment.

Over on Below Deck, two crew members were fired for sexually harassing other crew members. Bosun Luke Jones was fired after he attempted to crawl naked into the bed of another, unconscious crew member, and locked the producers out of the room when they went to stop him. And second steward Laura Bileskalne was fired after she was sympathetic to Jones and made multiple advances towards another crew member, including climbing on top of him to “give him a massage.”

Sooooo … Lizzo. Since the news came out that Lizzo created a hostile work environment for her backup dancers and fat shamed them, more women have come forward to say they had similar experiences with the singer. Director Sophia Nahli Allison also came forward saying that she quit working on a documentary project about Lizzo after two weeks because she was disrespectful, “arrogant, self-centered, and unkind.”

Lizzo responded on Instagram with a denial and non-apology:

The Made in America music festival canceled the event, citing “severe circumstances outside of production control.” Lizzo was set to be one of the headliners.

But hey: Beyoncé has her back.

Singer Morganne Picard is suing Bill Cosby for drugging and raping her in the 1980s.

Laura Luhn can move forward with her lawsuit against Fox News over the sexual abuse settlement she signed, allegedly under duress.

One Tree Hill star Bethany Joy Lenz reveals in an upcoming memoir that she was in a “Bible-based” cult for about a decade, and that her co-stars tried to help her leave.

Michael Imperioli has revealed that the toughest scenes to film on The Sopranos were the ones where Christopher had to be abusive towards Adriana. “On a technical level, you’re trying to be really careful so you don’t hurt the person. But having to get to that point of violence toward a woman, you have to go to some nasty places to get there. Sometimes it’s very immediate. Sometimes it’s something present in your life that you can tap into. Sometimes you have to go someplace from the past. And sometimes you have to go to someplace imaginary.” 

Ne-Yo needs to take all the seats.

The right was already all mad about Rachel Zegler being cast as Snow White in the upcoming live-action Disney movie on account of her not being white enough for them. But now she’s calling Prince Charming a “stalker” in the original film, and how the new film won’t focus so much on the “love story,” and they’re out here losing their minds. (She’s not wrong, though.)

 

LOL, die mad, y’all.

Speaking of movies that are making men BIG MAD, after seeing Barbie, Bill Maher called the movie, “preachy, man-hating, and a #ZombieLie.” And if you’re wondering what a “#ZombieLie” is, he explains it’s an idea that won’t die; the idea at hand in the Barbie movie is that the patriarchy exists. Just that it exists.

Mark Ronson had some thoughts:

But it was another Marc, Marc Maron whose thoughts on Barbie were  the best, most perfect response to Maher:

@marcdmaron

#barbiemovie #barbietiktok #gretagerwig #margotrobbie #ryangosling #willferrell

♬ original sound – Marc Maron

Suck it, Bill Maher.

Renewals

In Development

Casting News

Mark Your Calendars

R.I.P.

Darren Kent, Actor who played the goat herder on Game of Thrones in season four

Alex Collins, Former NFL player

WATCH THIS

Midsommar: Sometimes you just need to set things on fire, you know? 7 p.m., The Movie Channel

The Love Experiment: This new dating show is described as a “dating app brought to life” which, I don’t know, feels like a damn nightmare. Series premiere.  9 pm., MTV

Reinventing Elvis: The ’68 Comeback: On the eve of the 46th anniversary of his death, a look at Elvis’ comeback special through interviews with Elvis experts and audience members. Paramount+

TUES. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC Celebrity Wheel of Fortune
(repeat)		 Jeopardy! Masters
(repeat)		 The Chase
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CBS FBI
(repeat)		 FBI: International
(repeat)		 FBI: Most Wanted
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CW Penn & Teller: Fool Us
(repeat)		 Whose Line Is It Anyway?
(repeat)		 Whose Line Is It Anyway?
(repeat)		 Local
FOX Beat Shazam
(new)		 Don’t Forget the Lyrics
(new)		 News/Local
NBC America’s Got Talent
(new)		 That’s My Jam
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