foolish watcher

‘The Bachelor’: In which one family refuses to Grant an audience at the Dreaded Hometowns

Therese Odell
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The Bachelor
March 3, 2025

Ahh, the Dreaded Hometowns are here. Reasons to Hate the Dreaded Hometowns:

1. They’re repetitive.

2. They drag innocent people into it; people who did not sign up for this bullshit.

3. They’re repetitive.

4. They’re boring.

5. They’re repetitive.

But, like that Fantasy Suites, we’ve got to forge through this episode and the most boring part of the series — the last episodes — if we ever want to be done with this yawn of a season.

We begin with a prologue in Los Angeles where Grant reminds us for the 70th time that he didn’t have much of a family structure when he was growing up, and that he wants a family to call his own. THIS IS IMPORTANT BUSINESS THAT GRANT IS TAKING VERY IMPORTANTLY.

First stop: Newton, Massachusetts to meet Front Runner’s family.

Before introducing Grant to the entire island of Sicily her family, Front Runner takes Grant on a tour of her town to show Grant how the “Italians get down”: they take over the kitchen of some pizza joint, they make some very messy cannoli, they make hand gestures at one another while yelling “AY” and “YO” while wearing sweatsuits and gaudy jewelry, they do some plumbing.

They also stop at some cafe to have a chat before the reckoning, where Front Runner informs Grant that she hasn’t brought someone home in a long time. Her last relationship ended in a very dark place and she knows her familiga is going to be very protective of her, especially since they know there are still other women in the mix. Grant asks her roughly how many people he’ll be meeting that night and she begins rattling off her parents, her sisters, her friends, about 15 uncles and aunts, and 60 cousins.

Grant:

Front Runner adds that her father is going to have tough questions for them, but Grant assures her that he doesn’t mind being grilled: his feelings and intentions are in the right place.

That said, in a voice-over, Grant notes that Italian-American fathers are famously protective, and he’s a little nervous.

That evening, Grant and Front Runner go to her home where the familigia is, indeed, throwing a huge festa in the backyard, and everyone — and somehow more? — are there. After her father delivers a toast in which he jokes (???) that only 30% of the familigia could be there, Grant kisses Front Runner RIGHT IN FRONT OF EVERYONE. After feigning outrage, Dad laughs it off, and you know what? AY, YO, I like this guy!

Front Runner first chats with her sister, and tells her that for some reason she just knows that Grant is her guy, and adds that they share a similar sad story. Sister is happyish for Front Runner, but still worries about her heart being broken, which: reasonable!

Elsewhere, Grant is boring Mom with his wolf tattoo.

Grant then sits with Dad who opens by saying that his daughter seems very happy with him. That said, he’s got a problem on his hands because Grant is going to be doing this three more times with three other women, and his daughter might get hurt in the process.

Grant understands, but assures Dad that he’s falling for Front Runner and feels like she could be a woman who could help him grow and be a better man. Grant then throws a little flattery in there, noting that he respects the man that Dad is, how he’s kept his familigia together and been a good provider. Dad, unsurprisingly, decides that Grant “has a good head on his shoulders.”

Dad takes this attitude to Front Runner, telling her that he “loves the guy” — which might be the first time I’ve heard a father say that on the Dreaded Hometowns? — and that he seems ready for a relationship.

And then while walking him out, Front Runner tells Grant that she’s falling in love with him, so we can check that milestone off her list.

Next up: New York City for T-Shirt Gun’s date … even though she’s from Virginia.

Turns out T-Shirt Gun lives and works in New York and is estranged from her parents, so they won’t be involved today. Instead, Grant will meet her family and “chosen family” after spending the day playing model with T-Shirt Gun.

See, T-Shirt Gun is a project manager at a tech company that does stock thingies (I think), but she’s also a signed model with Wilhemina. So she calls in some connections to do a bridal photoshoot with Brides Magazine because you just KNOW she was waiting for the “Bridal Photoshoot Group Date” that never happened.

Anyway:

After the photoshoot (which at one point T-Shirt Gun as the fictional bride tossed her bouquet to Grant, the fictional groom, which is not how that works), T-Shirt Gun informs Grant about the whole “not meeting my parents” thing, and he’s cool with it. Grant adds that he could not have chosen a better person to go on this hometown date with, which … I don’t … what? She chose the date, dummy, she was the ONLY person you’d go on this hometown date with by the nature of the hometown date structure.

Then Grant and T-Shirt Gun are in some anonymous suburban neighborhood where they meet her sister, her best friends, and her aunt and uncle. Upon introduction, Grant tells her family that T-Shirt Gun is “strong and unwavering,” qualities that he values in her.

T-Shirt Gun visits with her skeptical aunt and uncle first, and tells them that she is happy and comfortable with Grant, but Aunt and Uncle remain unmoved.

T-Shirt Gun then visits with her sister, Faith, who says that she’s never seen her sister so happy and healthy with someone before and that she loves the way Grant looks at her.

T-Shirt Gun tells her that it’s been great so far but adds that Grant’s not perfect. “Who is?” replies Faith, only to have T-Shirt Gun remind her that T-Shirt Gun herself is pretty close. T-Shirt Gun reveals that she is the only woman remaining who never went on one of the extravagant one-on-one dates, and Faith is like, “THE FUCK?”

Unsurprisingly, when Faith has a chat with Grant her first question is, “THE FUCK?” Grant sells her a line of bullshit about not needing that time with her sister because they had such great conversations and have such a great connection based on their similar traumas.

Faith asks if T-Shirt Gun’s strained relationship with their parents will be a problem for him, and he’s like, “Oh no, I know all about dysfunctional families, it’s cool. If anything, it makes me MORE comfortable than being around perfect families.”

And with that, Grant is sent off to his next Dreaded Hometown while T-Shirt Gun notes that she’s more optimistic now that she’s had an ACTUAL date with this man, and hopes it’s not too late for them.

Next stop: Somewhere, Wyoming

Grant meets Miss Mormon out in the middle of nowhere to go horseback riding. Miss Mormon explains that she’s not originally from Wyoming; after her Grandma Candy passed away, her family chose Wyoming to be one of the places they would gather together. And understandably so: it’s spectacularly gorgeous, and I’m saying that as a born and bred city mouse who has little interest in “nature” and “outside.”

Miss Mormon and Grant ride around for a while to “awaken the country side” of Grant, and eventually have a long talk about what he can expect when meeting her family. Her family is all Mormon, and this will be the first person she’s brought home that isn’t in the church. Grant notes that he’s never known Mormons before, but that his mother was very religious and strict which gave him a narrow view of religion generally. He doesn’t know what, exactly, to expect from today, but he’s coming into it with an open heart and mind.

Still, he explains to us, he’s nervous: he’s not Mormon, he has tattoos and piercings, and he likes to drink and have fun. Will they accept him? Will they resent him? Will they think she’s “going rogue” to be with him? QUESTIONS. MORMON MYSTERIES.

Spoiler alert: her nice Mormon family is nice and Mormon and welcomes Grant with open Mormon arms.

Grant is welcomed by Miss Mormon’s giant Mormon family: mother and stepfather, brothers, cousins, nieces and nephews, and one adorable grandfather.

After being introduced to everyone, learning from her four-year-old niece that there is a lot of tongue kissing on The Bachelor, and an overly aggressive game of tug-of-war, Grant sits down with Miss Mormon’s stepfather for a chat.

Dad admits that meeting their family can be overwhelming: he had a similar experience when he started dating Miss Mormon’s mother. Grant tells Dad that he has feelings for his daughter and can see himself with her. Dad responds by saying that he read about Grant and learned that he is a man of faith (he is?) and that while he may not be a member of their church (yet) it doesn’t mean they can’t accept him (as long as he believes in Jesus Christ as his personal lord and savior). Dad goes on to remind Grant that family is VERY IMPORTANT to them, and if you look around, everyone has four or five children. Miss Mormon is 31 and TIME IS RUNNING OUT, GRANT.

Grant’s literal face:

BEACUSE, YOU KNOW, WOW, DAD. WOW. COULD WE NOT TALK ABOUT HER FERTILITY WITH A GUY YOU MET 15 MINUTES AGO? THANKS.

Grant then visits with Miss Mormon’s Mom whom he tells he’s ready for an engagement and that he’s falling in love with her daughter. Mom responds by saying that they have no expectations for him, as long as God is an important part of raising his family. Mom also reiterates the part where her daughter is ready to pop out babies. NOW. RIGHT NOW. GIVE HER BABIES.

Grant then tells us, with all the sincerity and innocence of someone who knows nothing about the Mormon church, that Miss Mormon’s family assured him that he doesn’t have to become Mormon to be with her, and he is deeply relieved.

Miss Mormon has an incredibly sweet conversation with her grandfather, who is exceptionally adorable. She notes that her own mother brought someone home that didn’t look like the rest of the family and he and her grandmother loved him nevertheless. Grandfather notes that Miss Mormon’s father was an easy man to love, and that they never hesitated for a second in believing that he was the right person for her mother.

Grandfather talks about how much he loved and misses her grandmother, that they had a deep love for each other, the kind of love that never goes away. He then adds that he thinks Grant could be that guy for Miss Mormon. And Miss Mormon, she tells Grandfather a secret: She thinks she loves Grant.

Miss Mormon then has a conversation with her mother where she reveals that she’s nervous about the Fantasy Suites because it will hurt her feelings if he sleeps with other women since she won’t be sleeping with him. And Mom’s response? NOT WHAT I WAS EXPECTING: “Are you open to keeping an open mind about it?” Miss Mormon agrees that she has to give him the benefit of the doubt, because he’s always made her feel special.

Oh, girl, you can give Grant the benefit of the doubt, but don’t give the producers such room because they will do everything in their power to spin drama out of this. The devil works hard, but these producers work harder.

Miss Mormon tells her mother that she thinks she loves him, and that the moment she fell for him was when he told her about his traumatic childhood.

So that’s super healthy and a good foundation for a relationship.

Finally, Miss Mormon says a tearful goodbye to her family before walking Grant out and telling him that she is falling in love with him. Grant reciprocates, telling her that he’s falling in love with her, too.

You in danger, girl.

Finally: Chicago.

Grant is all excited to meet Hand Model’s huge family — Mom, Dad, and all 11 siblings. But when he arrives, Hand Model is like, “Change of plans: my entire family has decided they don’t want to meet you because they think you’re a manwhore.”

And you know what, Hand Model’s Family? GOOD FOR YOU. You saw point number 2 at the beginning of this piece and were like, “NOPE, NOT US, WE’RE NO SUCKERS.” And for that, I applaud you. Look, the sentiment online is that you guys ruined Hand Model’s chances to get fake engaged to this man, but I see it differently: you called bullshit on some bullshit because you don’t have time for bullshit. Heroes, all 67 of you.

Grant asks Hand Model how she feels about this development and if it will affect how she feels about him, and she’s like, “It’s no biggie, I like you a lot. Anyway, let’s go meet my friends and not talk about this weirdness anymore.”

So they go to some pumpkin patch and I had to look this up because I would have thought we should be well into November by now — long past pumpkin patch time — but NOPE. Filming on this show took place between September 18 – October 31. I want you to really chew on that: from start to PROPOSAL, that is 43 days.

They play games which Hand Model loses.

And they wander into a corn maze where they worry about getting lost.

Hand Model’s friends arrive in a giant pack and Hand Model bursts into tears at the sight of someone actually showing up for her.

Upon meeting Grant, Hand Model’s friends take him aside and grill him about his feelings about her. He explains that he respects that she is so driven and brilliant and accomplished and that he can see them being providers for each other.

Other Friend asks Grant about the family part: is her family not being there holding him back from a relationship with her? Grant replies that while it’s not holding him back, there is a time crunch — he’s going to be proposing to someone in two weeks, and it’d be nice to meet the families of everyone involved first.

Friends then chat with Hand Model herself who tells them that while she’s not in love with Grant at this very moment, she is in a place where she could fall in love with him.

Oh no, girl, then why are you wasting your time? You’re wasting his time, you’re wasting our time, but worst of all, you’re wasting your time and you know it.

Meanwhile, other friends visit with Grant who tell him that Hand Model’s family is actually super great and if things work out, they’ll welcome him as one of their own, don’t worry about it, and DON’T HOLD THAT AGAINST HAND MODEL.

And then Hand Model sends Grant back to Los Angeles so she can pick out the dress she will be dumped in.

Back in Los Angeles, Grant has a beer with Bachelor Joey — the last (only?) good Bachelor — who urges Grant to listen to his gut instead of looking for hard data for answers.

Meanwhile, the producers thought it would be funny to make the four remaining women have drinks together and compare notes on their hometowns. As Front Runner and T-Shirt Gun gush about Grant meeting their families and how it couldn’t have possibly gone better, Hand Model looks like she’s going to vomit.

But no time to be sick, Hand Model! Go put on your Dump Me dress and get in line!

Rose #1: Miss Mormon
Rose #2: Front Runner
Rose #3: T-Shirt Gun

Which means the woman who must go away now is Hand Model, as we all knew. Hand Model, who had to be expecting this, takes the rejection with grace, telling him that her time with him taught her a lot about herself, and how she now knows that she is ready for marriage. She wishes him the best and that he finds what he’s looking for. All in all, a class act, even if I question some of her choices when it comes to unnecessary fillers.

Good bye and good luck, Hand Model; maybe date another lawyer.

Here are the ladies who have been eliminated along with their very not good nicknames:

Here are the women along with their dumb nicknames who are still “dating” Grant:

The Bachelor airs on ABC on Mondays at 7/8 p.m. and streams on Hulu.

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