IT IS DECEMBER! AND THAT MEANS WE ARE VERY NEARLY DONE WITH THIS GARBAGE YEAR. 31 DAYS TO GO.
My hospital hired an employee whose only job is to go around saying hi to other employees while they work pic.twitter.com/WWXNeEiWne
— Shari Dunaway, MD (@ShariDunawayMD) November 20, 2020
Additionally, we are 50 days away from me writing about politics on this blog every goddamned day.
But until January 20, 2021, we are still dealing with President Crayon-eater’s nonsense. He’s still trying to coup, but his paths are narrowing further and further. As of yesterday, all six of the crucial states that cemented Biden’s win certified their votes:
🚨NEW: All six key states have now certified their election results with Joe Biden as the winner:
✅Georgia (ongoing recount)
Trump and his allies remain 1-39 in court.
— Marc E. Elias (@marceelias) November 30, 2020
And in perhaps President Still a Loser’s most humiliating moment during this whole fucking ordeal, Arizona’s Republican Governor, Doug Ducey, silenced an incoming call from the White House while he was in the middle of certifying Biden’s win. This is delicious:
Arizona’s Republican Gov. Doug Ducey appeared to ignore a phone call from the White House on Monday while certifying Joe Biden’s victory in the state.
— CBS News (@CBSNews) December 1, 2020
With the votes now certified, there are only a few paths left for the Grifter-in-Chief to try to steal this election: 1. take his case to the Supreme Court (which note: they have not as of this writing taken this case to the Supreme Court yet), 2. hope that multiple Republican State Legislatures go rogue and reverse their states’ elections and assign electors themselves or 3. pray that thirty-seven (37!) faithless electors change their vote from Biden to President Illegitimate.
I’m sincerely-and we should all be-grateful to members of the GOP willing to reject the easy, partisan calls for mass chaos and hijacking a free, fair election.
AZ, GA, PA, elsewhere.
A strong primer:https://t.co/CQXfJoEyLd
— John Fetterman (@JohnFetterman) December 1, 2020
The only option above that has a sliver of a chance of happening is the campaign taking their case to the Supreme Court — but that does not guarantee victory. A bunch of conservative judges — some President Cheetostain’s own appointees — have laughed case after case out of court because the campaign is not producing any evidence of fraud. BECAUSE IT DOES NOT EXIST.
In the meantime, President Chaos continues to make things worse for the Republicans in the Georgia Senate runoff election.
"Then call off election." Wait, what? https://t.co/C5kJYrjWMg
— Chris Odell (@__Chris_Odell__) December 1, 2020
But it’s not only the Georgian Republicans that President Disorder is screwing over: in a sign that he might actually be realizing the exit door is looming, he is now threatening to launch his 2024 campaign on Joe Biden’s Inauguration Day. LOL, OK, DO IT. Sure, it’s a petty move and it signals that this asshole will try to be a shadow President during Biden’s entire term, but at the same time, this completely kneecaps any up-and-coming GOPers ambitions to run in 2024. I’M HERE FOR IT.
And the other sign that we’re nearing the finale of all this bullshittery? Rudy has discussed a possible pardon with President Felon.
Hang tight, we’re almost done.
Oh, it’s just Kevin Hart calling his 15-year-old daughter a “ho” in a comedy special and then getting all defensive when people called him out on it and then comparing himself to Oprah and Obama while defending the likes of Bill Cosby.
See, if “canceling” were actually a thing — which it is not — we would not be talking about this right now because Kevin Hart would not have a Netflix special in which he could spew misogynistic bullshit and he would not be promoting said special on popular podcasts because he would have been “canceled” after all the homophobic bullshit he previously spewed. But he wasn’t and here we are.
Vanderbilt University’s Sarah Fuller became the first woman to play in a Power 5 football game on Saturday, and I’m not going to post all the horrific misogynistic things that were written about her because this is a positive story and I’m not going to allow people’s hate taint it, goddammit.
I know it’s a lot to ask an octogenarian to be sensitive to trans issues — it apparently is difficult to ask people my own age to not be jackasses about it — but even so, I’m still disappointed in John Cleese.
Laverne Cox was attacked in a Los Angeles park for being trans. So keep making those jokes, assholes.
So, Rosario Dawson made her debut on The Mandalorian, which brought up a year-old accusation that she and her family attacked a trans man, claims that have been dismissed and which she addressed in a Vanity Fair interview.
Hey, Sunday was our biggest travel day since the pandemic began. 1.2 million people went through airports on that day, so brace yourselves.
But at least we have the vaccine to look forward to, right? Well, yes, but the problem is President Not My Problem is still in the White House for seven more weeks, and as of now, he plans to make the distribution of the vaccine the states’ problem. This is hardly surprising as this has been the administration’s attitude towards the pandemic the entire time: let the states deal with it. Worked out great, so far.
The White House is planning multiple holiday parties. What could go wrong?
True story: last month — LAST MONTH — some fucking idiots decided to host a “swingers festival” in New Orleans, and 250 fucking idiots attended. Now 41 fucking idiots have tested positive and the fucking idiots who organized it have some regrets. I NEVER WANT TO HEAR ANOTHER GODDAMNED POLITICIAN TELL ME THAT WE HAVE TO RELY ON PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY BECAUSE THE FACT OF THE MATTER IS WE ARE ALL A BUNCH OF FUCKING IDIOTS WHO WILL DO THE FUCKING IDIOTIC THING GIVEN HALF A FUCKING CHANCE.
And then there is this: Los Angeles was going to shut down a testing site for a day so that a She’s All That remake starring a TikTok star could shoot there, but then people were understandably pissed, so they had to pull the filming permit. We are an incredibly stupid species.
Scenes from a Marriage had to suspend production because of two positive tests on set.
Queen Sono is the latest Netflix show that had been renewed that is now canceled because of the pandemic.
All Other TV News
So, I watched The Undoing and finally caught up with the finale last night, and personally my reaction is: WOOF. Still, I could make an argument for why it worked (but I won’t). If you watched — and based on the ratings, a lot of you did — and still have questions (Grace’s flashbacks? That kiss?), I recommend this article. But it’s spoiler-HEAVY so tread carefully with all those links.
Showtime has added a Pluto TV channel that will make 250 hours of their programming free in an attempt to lure new subscribers.
Someone absolutely needs to make this fake Quibi show, and I happen to know a Real Housewives of New York tertiary character who should be cast immediately.
How Jordan Klepper and his beard became a sex symbol. Because 2020, man.
Y’all need to be nicer to Millie Bobby Brown, you monsters.
Be kind to others. Find compassion. Wear a mask.
All those things cost zero dollars and take zero energy.
— stranger writers (@strangerwriters) November 30, 2020
Breaking News: Ben Shapiro is a homophobic idiot.
- Folklore has been renewed for a second season at HBO.
- Foster Friends, a comedy about foster parents, is in development at CBS.
- Charlie Booker is making a mockumentary about 2020 starring Hugh Grant for Netflix.
- The Plague Year and The Donner Party are in development at History Channel.
- John Heilemann’s book about the Biden campaign has been optioned at Showtime.
- The long-rumored Alien series is still being rumored. Who knows.
- Gugu Mbatha-Raw will star in Surface on Apple TV+.
- Jake Choi is joining American Housewife on ABC.
- Mel B is hosting the BBC competition series, The Fashion Hero.
- Bradley Walsh and Tosin Cole are leaving Doctor Who after the Christmas special.
Mark Your Calendars
- Euphoria returns on HBO for a two-part special on December 6.
- My Gift: A Christmas Special From Carrie Underwood will premiere on HBO Max on December 3.
- Red Dot will debut on Netflix on February 11.
- Best Leftovers Ever! will premiere on Netflix on December 30.
- Men in Kilts will debut on Starz in early 2021.
.@SamHeughan, @grahammctavish, and one of the most beautiful countries on Earth… now that’s an adventure worth watching. #MenInKilts: A Roadtrip with Sam and Graham premieres early 2021 on @STARZ. pic.twitter.com/X9ISc1Wkbu
— Men in Kilts: A Roadtrip with Sam and Graham (@MenInKiltsSTARZ) November 30, 2020
- Rival Peak, the first-ever interactive AI reality series, will debut on Facebook Watch on December 2.
Quibi, Streaming platform
Abby Dalton, Falcon Crest and The Joey Bishop Show actress
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer: The only way to drag out a three-minute song into a one-hour special is to add a whole plotline about wanting to be 7 p.m., CBS
Let’s Make a Deal Primetime: It’s “Let’s Make a Deal,” but at nighttime! 8 p.m., CBS
Natalie Palamides: Nate – A One Man Show: Comedian Natalie Palamides is “Nate” in this one-man show, a dude reckoning with his toxic masculinity. Netflix
- Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon: Keanu Reeves, Alex Winter, Gov. Andrew Cuomo, Smashing Pumpkins
- The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: Bryan Cranston, Cori Bush
- The Late Late Show with James Corden: John Lithgow, Gary Barlow
- Jimmy Kimmel Live: John Mulaney, Rita Wilson, Devon Gilfillian
- The Daily Show: The Daily Social Distancing Show
- Watch What Happens Live: Melissa McCarthy, Ben Falcone
|CBS||Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer||Let’s Make a Deal Primetime||FBI: Most Wanted
|Tell Me a Story
|FOX||Cosmos: Possible Worlds