UPDATE: President Loser still lost.

It’s Friday, HUZZAH!

Political Crap

I’m going to keep this brief because I feel like I’m repeating myself these days: “Here’s how President Autogolpe is trying to steal the election, here’s why it’s going to fail, here’s why it’s still dangerous even though Biden will be sworn in at the end of the day.”

But the bottom line is that this dingdong train ride will be coming to an end soon enough. The lawsuits are a joke:

.., his attorneys have repeatedly made elementary errors in those high-profile cases: misspelling “poll watcher” as “pole watcher,” forgetting the name of the presiding judge during a hearing, inadvertently filing a Michigan lawsuit before an obscure court in Washington and having to refile complaints after erasing entire arguments they’re using to challenge results.

Today Georgia certified its results, and President Fewer Votes still lost:

On Monday, Michigan and Pennsylvania will certify theirs, and barring something completely insane happening, the electors will be set on December 8 and will elect Biden on December 14.

But here’s a fun American Bar Association article published on September 25:

According to unnamed sources who spoke with the Atlantic, the Trump campaign is discussing plans to bypass election results and appoint loyal electors in battleground states.

“With a justification based on claims of rampant fraud, Trump would ask state legislators to set aside the popular vote and exercise their power to choose a slate of electors directly,” according to the Atlantic. “The longer Trump succeeds in keeping the vote count in doubt, the more pressure legislators will feel to act before the safe harbor deadline expires.”

THEY HAVE BEEN TELLING US FOR MONTHS THEY WERE GOING TO DO THIS. LITERALLY: THEY OUTLINED THE WHOLE SCHEME MONTHS AGO, AND YET EVERYONE IS CLUTCHING THEIR PEARLS NOW, SHOCKED THAT THEY ARE DOING THE THING THEY PROMISED THEY WOULD DO.

Anyway, I choose to stay calm — today — because the plot outlined above is failing, and I know that because not even Tucker Carlson is biting. I mentioned in passing yesterday’s insane press conference with Rudy Guiliani, what with the My Cousin Vinny and the leaking hair dye and the yelling that cities are frauds or whatever. But what I didn’t include was the batshit conspiracy theories spouted by one of President Batshit Conspiracy Theorist’s lawyers, Sidney Powell. Powell claimed that voting machines were flipping votes from Trump to Biden and something about Hugo Chavez — who has been dead for seven years — being involved. I dunno, it’s not worth worrying about. The point is, Tucker was intrigued by this theory, but when he asked Powell for, you know, EVIDENCE, she was unable to provide any and then got all pissy with him:

When Tucker Carlson isn’t carrying your water for you anymore …

And then there is the slow, so slow trickle of Republicans telling President King Baby that he lost and he needs to fucking get over it already. It is NOT ENOUGH, but it is a start:

 

We’re getting there. It’s infuriating, and these shenanigans will probably continue to happen until December 8, December 14 at the latest, but it’s not going to work. Unless “it” is undermining Biden’s presidency with half of all Americans, and giving the GOP bad ideas about future elections. If that’s what we’re talking about, then “it” is working beautifully.

Three COVID-related political thingees:

The White House Coronavirus Task Force held a press conference yesterday for the first time in months. However, after the nearly 90-minute briefing, Mike Pence just walked out without taking questions and it went over really well with the press:

You need to read this horrifying article about how people who live in the conservative media bubble who HAVE COVID deny that they have COVID.

Perez, who said she recently became symptomatic and is awaiting the results of her own COVID-19 test, told me she was once bullied by a patient for wearing personal protective equipment. “I was taking care of a trauma patient [in the non-COVID-19 area] and I was wearing my N95 mask to protect myself,” she recalled. “He proceeded to verbally mock me and said, ‘Take off your mask. What’s the matter, are you a Democrat or something?’ I explained it was for my protection against COVID-19 and had nothing to do with politics, but he continued to harass me about wearing a mask.” She added, “Every single person I have encountered who was misinformed on COVID-19 referenced the president’s dishonesty on Fox News or social media. For Americans to believe a politician over experts is horrifying to us nurses on the front lines. This is insane. I have never seen anything like it.”

An infectious disease doctor who asked to remain anonymous told me he had never before experienced politics overshadowing science in the medical field. “Before [Donald] Trump I never spoke politics in the clinic room,” he said. “There is no doubt that COVID splits into fact-free and factful worlds. This is why we have a raging epidemic: it’s the Trump bubble.”

“Viruses don’t care about human truth—they only care about biology,” he added. “We are in a hyperendemic right now. It’s everywhere. It’s exponential. It’s in all parts of the country: the suburbs, the cities, the mountains…it’s everywhere.” 

I would have put this under “Going Viral,” except I think this is a much more political story than one about the virus. For the past 25 years, people have been told that there is an alternative reality wherein what they feel is real is actually real and that the conventional media are a bunch of liberal liars. These people have been primed for decades to dismiss scientists and experts as having their own agendas instead of, you know, just reporting on objective reality. And so, when someone like President Shameless comes along and lies with impunity, and the lies align with what they already feel and believe, they are not only thrilled to embrace him, they will die because of him, because of his lies, believing them even as they take their last breath. It’s terrible, it’s a condemnation of our entire system, but it was always inevitable in a world where outlets like Fox News are allowed to spew their bullshit.

Meanwhile, Geraldo Rivera suggested the vaccine be named for President Denial to soften the blow of his loss. LOLOLOLOLOLOL NEVER.

Going Viral

Pfizer is applying for emergency approval of their vaccine from the FDA today, and hope to have 20 million doses ready to go next month for health care workers. We are tantalizingly close to being able to end this thing, we just have to get through the next few months, so be safe and proactive. It would be a horrible tragedy to lose people close to you just a month or two before a vaccine was widely available to everyone.

Rachel Maddow has not been hosting her show for the past two weeks after she was exposed to someone who was positive for the virus. Of course, that’s not much of an explanation, as she hosted the show from her home for months early into the pandemic. Turns out, she had a pretty good excuse: the person Maddow was exposed to was her partner Susan, and Susan very nearly died. You need to watch her segment, especially if you’re planning on doing Thanksgiving with a big group this year:

California is issuing a limited stay-at-home order, though it doesn’t apply to entertainment industry workers because in California, they are essential workers.

The 33-year-old singer Jeremih’s condition is severe: he is on a ventilator in the ICU.

Rick Scott has tested positive, surprising exactly no one.

Andrew Giuliani, Rudy’s idiot son, has tested positive, and hey! guess who was at that insane press conference?

The Bold and the Beautiful had another positive test and are making production adjustments.

ViacomCBS is planning for 70% of its workforce to continue working for home even in a post-pandemic world.

Disney is considering premiering the live-action movies Cruella, Pinocchio, and Peter Pan and Wendy on Disney+ instead of in theaters.

All Other TV News

Supernatural came to an end last night and SPOILER! gave Sam and Dean happy endings — of a sort. Whitney will have her recap up soon, I’m sure, but in the meantime, if you just want the nuts and bolts of how the longest-running genre show ended, you can click here. From what I’ve seen, fans seem really torn about how it all ended, and I get it, believe me: I weathered Lost and Game of Thrones. But I will also say that as a casual viewer, I thought it was fitting and moving, and more than that, it was satisfying. And I find myself — admittedly from a place of some distance — agreeing with what a lot of the Game of Thrones actors said when that show ended: that a lot of the fans’ anger at the finale is coming from a place where they just don’t want the show to end, that basically there would never be a satisfying ending for them. (I don’t agree that this is the source of the anger at GoT, let’s be clear, I have VERY strong feelings about how that show could have ended in a satisfying fashion, and I am STILL VERY PISSED OFF.) And even Eric Kripke says he tried to come up with a better ending, and couldn’t.

Anyway, it looks like ABC’s show Big Sky is using some of SPN‘s locations. Supernatural fans will know exactly what this is after last night:

R.I.P. Show.

Grey’s Anatomy is not done with casting stunts.

Yesterday’s Jeopardy! opened with an important message:

How are the Brits responding to The Crown? Exactly how you think they are: “The queen’s salute has also been criticized. A letter by an army veteran to The Times of London read, ‘To my recollection Her Majesty’s salute has always been exemplary, with the forearm and hand being ramrod straight. This may not perhaps be noticed by many viewers, but to us ex-military types, with a passion for standards, it is particularly galling.’”

HBO would like the courts to throw out the Leaving Neverland lawsuit, please and thank you.

Now Zak Bagans owns the Poltergeist clown.

Oh no, Cake Boss might not be able to bake again after a terrible injury to his hand.

In Development

  • DMZ, the DC comic series, is being turned into a limited series at HBO Max by Ava DuVernay. Rosario Dawson is set to star.
  • Family Affair, a family comedy about a fading R&B star produced by Mary J. Blige and 50 Cent, is being developed at ABC.
  • Out There, a dramedy from Sharon Horgan, is being developed at Hulu.
  • Game of Talents, a Spanish mystery talent show has been ordered at Fox. Wayne Brady is set to host.
  • Oaklandia, an animated series produced by and starring Snoop Dogg, is being developed at Amazon.
  • Blood Brothers, a series about the friendship between Malcolm X and Muhammad Ali, is being developed at A&E.
  • The G Word with Adam Conover has been ordered at Netflix.
  • Killers Of The Cosmos, a “dramatized documentary series” — whatever that means — starring Aidan Gillen, has been ordered at Discovery.
  • Zoe Bakes has been ordered at Magnolia Network.
  • Death Saved My Life has been ordered at Lifetime.
  • Shawn Levy has signed a first-look deal with Netflix.

Casting News

Mark Your Calendar

ABC has announced its winter dates:

  • The Rookie returns on January 3
  • The Good Doctor: January 11
  • The Goldbergs: January 13
  • American Housewife: January 13
  • The Conners: January 13
  • Call Your Mother: January 13
  • For Life: January 20
  • black-ish: January 26
  • mixed-ish: January 26
  • Big Sky: January 26

 

  • The Walking Dead will return on AMC on February 28.
  • The Resident returns on Fox on January 12.
  • Batwoman will return on The CW on January 17.
  • Godmothered will debut on Disney+ on December 4.
  • Giving Voice will debut on Netflix on December 11.
  • Macho: The Hector Camacho Story will debut on Showtime on December 4.
  • Chico Bon Bon and the Very Berry Holiday will stream on Netflix Jr. on December 3.

R.I.P.

Kirby Morrow, Voice actor for Gundam Wing and Dragon Ball Z

Broselianda Hernández Boudet, Cuban actress

WATCH THIS

FRIDAY

Marvel’s 616: This series explores Marvel’s creative process. “Episodes in this anthology series will cover topics including Marvel’s world-spanning artists, the trailblazing women of Marvel Comics, discovering the “forgotten” characters of Marvel, and much more.” Disney+

The Right Stuff: Series finale. Disney+

SATURDAY

Between the World and Me: Mahershala Ali, Angela Bassett, Angela Davis, Alicia Garza, Tip “T.I.” Harris, Jharrel Jerome, Mimi Jones, Marc Bamuthi Joseph, Ledisi, Janet Mock, Jason Moran, Joe Morton, Wendell Pierce, Phylicia Rashad, Greg Alverez Reid, Mj Rodriguez, Kendrick Sampson, Yara Shahidi, Nate Smith, Tariq “Black Thought” Trotter, Courtney B. Vance, Olivia Washington, Pauletta Washington, Susan Kelechi Watson, Michelle Wilson, and Oprah Winfrey all appear in this adaptation of Ta-Nehisi Coates’ best-selling book. 7 p.m., HBO

Underwater: This ocean-monster movie starring Kristen Stewart, Vincent Cassel and T.J. Miller for some reason is described by critics as “instantly forgettable,” and “The Abyss‘-lite, the horror beats feel cadged from Alien and the seafood-looking CG monsters appear to have been liberated from a bin outside Iceland.” So, you know. 8 p.m., HBO

Saturday Night Live: It should be a new episode but at this writing, I’m not sure who the host is. UPDATE: it is not a new episode. They are re-airing a Kerry Washington/Eminem episode from 2017? Ok, sure.  10:30 p.m., NBC

SUNDAY

Dolly Parton’s Christmas on the Square: A cold-hearted Christine Baranski tries to sell her hometown’s land but I bet Dolly Parton’s songs change Christine Baranski‘s mind. Premiere.  Netflix

2020 American Music Awards: Taraji P. Henson hosts what ABC would like to call music’s “hottest night of the year” to which the Grammys might have something to say about. 7 p.m., ABC

Belushi: A revealing look into the legendary comedian’s life. Premiere. 8 p.m., Showtime

Late Night:

  • Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon (Friday): Leslie Mann, Colin Quinn, SAINt JHN
  • Watch What Happens Live (Sunday): WWHL Friendsgiving

FRI. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC Shark Tank
(new)
20/20
CBS MacGyver
(new)
Magnum P.I.
(new)
Blue Bloods
(repeat)
CW Masters of Illusion
(new)
Masters of Illusion
(repeat)
World’s Funniest Animals
(new)
World’s Funniest Animals
(new)
Local
FOX Friday Night Smackdown Local
NBC The Blacklist
(new)
Dateline


SAT. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30 10:00 10:30 11:00 11:30
ABC College Football
(live)
News/Local
CBS NCIS: New Orleans
(repeat)
48 Hours 48 Hours News/Local
FOX College Football
(live)
News/Local
NBC The Croods Saturday Night Live
(repeat)
News/
Local
Saturday Night Live
(repeat)


SUN. 6:00 6:30 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC America’s Funniest Home Videos
(new)
American Music Awards
(live)
CBS 60 Minutes NCIS: Los Angeles
(new)
NCIS: New Orleans
(new)
 
The CW Local Pandora
(new)
The Outpost
(new)
Local
FOX The OT
(live)
The Simp-sons
(new)
Bless the Harts
(new)
Bob’s Burgers
(new)
Family Guy
(new)
Local/News
NBC Sunday Night Football
(live)

2 thoughts on “UPDATE: President Loser still lost.

  1. I would literally lick the floor of an ER waiting room in South Dakota before I ever inject something called “The Trump” into my body. F–K Geraldo Rivera and f–K the demented orange Peep that got us into this mess in the first place.

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