OK, but what if Bert & Ernie were gay? Couldn’t we all just be cool with that?

OH WE’RE GOING TO FIGHT ABOUT MUPPETS NOW? OK, LET’S DO THIS. If somehow you managed to avoid the breaking Sesame Street news yesterday, first of all, bless you. Second of all, may I please have the name of the contractor who built your bunker, I am going to be in need of one until this Kavanaugh mess goes away. But third, what had happened was, Mark Saltzman, a former Sesame Street writer who joined the series in the early eighties gave an interview in which he claimed he wrote Bert and Ernie as if they were a gay couple.

People freeeeeeeeeeeaked out. Exhibit A:

So then Frank Oz tweeted that they weren’t gay:

And Sesame Workshop issued a statement denying that Ernie and Bert are in a relationship or even have a sexual orientation:

https://twitter.com/SesameWorkshop/status/1042117602678587395

But then this led to an argument about whether or not puppets can have sexual orientations, an argument to which the puppets of Avenue Q might have something to add. Also, if puppets don’t have sexual orientation, that might come as news to Kermit, Miss Piggy, and Gonzo.

So a couple of things:

1. The writer in question says that his comments were misconstrued, and if you actually read his quote, it’s obvious that he was just discussing his writing process and about writing what he knew:

Ok, so we have to address—that’s the big question, right? In the writer’s room, you’re all adults. Were you thinking of Bert & Ernie as a gay couple? Did that question ever come up?

I remember one time that a column from The San Francisco Chronicle, a preschooler in the city turned to mom and asked “are Bert & Ernie lovers?” And that, coming from a preschooler was fun. And that got passed around, and everyone had their chuckle and went back to it. And I always felt that without a huge agenda, when I was writing Bert & Ernie, they were. I didn’t have any other way to contextualize them. The other thing was, more than one person referred to Arnie & I as “Bert & Ernie.”

Nowhere does the interviewer ask whether Bert and Ernie are gay, and nowhere does Saltzman say they are.

But 2. Why not make Ernie and Bert gay? Sesame Street has long featured families and relationships of all kinds, so what real harm could come from normalizing the notion of same-sex relationships for children via Bert and Ernie? Just last month a 9-year-old boy who had come out as gay killed himself after he endured relentless bullying at school. I’m not saying that gay characters on Sesame Street would have saved him but maybe if he had more characters to identify with he wouldn’t have felt so alone, and maybe if his classmates had been exposed at a formative age to the idea that being gay is normal, he wouldn’t have been abused in the first place. And love is love is love is love is a message tailor-made for Sesame Street which has always been an inclusive place. YOU LOVE WHO YOU WANT TO LOVE, BERT & ERNIE, AND DON’T LET ANYONE ELSE DEFINE YOU.

Maroon 5 will be your Superbowl Halftime act which sounds about right. In fact, I’m surprised that Maroon 5 hasn’t already been the Superbowl Halftime act? Doesn’t it seem like they have been the Superbowl Halftime act like three times already?

Chuck Lorre should call Damon Lindelof, I’m sure he has some unused ideas lying around.

TREBEK BEARD CHEK.

They’re still talking about that Mad About You reboot for some damn reason. (Paul Reiser’s got nothing else to do.)

Discovery is being sued over Street Outlaws: Memphis after the cast beat up a couple, which is surprising behavior from the cast of something called “Street Outlaws.”

I love Jake Tapper.

This right here is just a really fucking creepy story.

BREAKING NEWS: Chevy Chase is still an asshole.

Sex Monster News

NOPE, GARRISON KEILLOR, NOPE. RETURN TO YOUR HOLE, PLEASE.

Julie Chen taped a message saying goodbye to The Talk — SEE YA! — but she’s staying at Big Brother. For now.

Meanwhile, get a load of this: Les Moonves still has office space at CBS, security services paid for and access to the company jet. COME. ON.

Will Bill Cosby go to jail? I CERTAINLY HOPE SO.

Jonathan Kaiman, the Beijing bureau chief of the  Los Angeles Times’ office, has resigned after allegations that he had been sexually aggressive came out and were investigated.

Renewals

Cancellations

In Development

Casting News

Mark Your Calendars

  • The Haunting of Hill House will debut on Netflix on October 12 and it LOOKS GOOD.

R.I.P.

Dennis Norden, U.K. TV host and comedy writer

WATCH THIS

I Feel Bad: One-hour series premiere of the new sitcom about how hard it is to be a woman. AMEN. I’ve read some half-warm reviews of this series — people seem to think there’s potential, but that the show isn’t there yet — but can we just talk about what a terrible title this is? I know it’s based on the book “I Feel Bad. All Day. Every Day. About Everything.” But I think it’s going to turn off some viewers. 9 p.m., NBC

The Sinner: Y’ALL NEED TO FIND JULIAN. Season finale. 9 p.m., USA

America’s Got Talent: A winner is chosen and there is about a 99% chance it will be a singer. Season finale. 7 p.m., NBC

Masterchef: A winner is chosen and there is about a 99% chance it will be a cook. Season finale. 7 p.m., Fox

Suits: Donna does what’s best for the firm in the season finale. 8 p.m., USA

American Horror Story: Apocalypse: “The Morning After” 9 p.m., FX

The Real Housewives of Dallas: “Smashing Friendships” 8 p.m., Bravo

Late Night: Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon: Kevin Hart, Robert Irwin Late Night with Seth Meyers: Matthew McConaughey, Taran Killam, Lady Antebellum, Sean Kinney The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: Jane Fonda, Willie Nelson The Late Late Show with James Corden: Kaley Cuoco, Joel McHale, Gaz Coombes Jimmy Kimmel Live: Peter Dinklage, Issa Rae, Ann Wilson Conan: Fred Armisen, Alice Eve, Jonathan Wilson The Daily Show: Eli Saslow & Derek Black Watch What Happens Live: Leeanne Locken, Brendan Schaub

WEDS. 7:00 7:30 8:00 8:30 9:00 9:30
ABC The Goldbergs
(repeat)
American Housewife
(repeat)
Modern Family
(repeat)
Modern Family
(repeat)
Shark Tank
(repeat)
CBS Big Brother
(new)
SEAL Team
(repeat)
Criminal Minds
(repeat)
CW Burden of Truth
(new)
Supergirl
(repeat)
Local
FOX MasterChef
(new)
News/Local
NBC America’s Got Talent
(live)
I Feel Bad
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I Feel Bad
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